Positive Thinking Garbage
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16-06-2013, 07:47 AM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
(16-06-2013 04:33 AM)AyameTan Wrote:  I certainly wouldn't condescend and tell a cancer victim, who has just undergone a harrowing chemotherapy course, to simply "grin and bear it." That would be profoundly insulting and unfair towards them.

You can't tell anyone how to feel, that comes from within.

Even cancer, even when terminal, can be dealt with from within the person, but never from without.

When my husband realized that this time around he was terminal, he was depressed for 2 days, then he jumped into action and made every minute count.

I find it best to just show even support when dealing with a person who is going through inner turmoil.

There are some tools one can use to improve one's attitude, but one really has to want to, and it takes a lot of introspection and self awareness.

No doubt it is better to feel good about things. It improves the quality of life.

Positive thinking strategies have been around for ages, and years ago I looked at a couple of books and maybe took away a sentence or two from each, that's about it.

Personally, I find positivity in rationality - once an issue has been rationally dissected and analysed, a positive move forward can be made.

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16-06-2013, 11:17 AM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
(15-06-2013 09:45 AM)Chas Wrote:  There are positive health effects for having a positive outlook, for being reasonable optimistic. And there are positive psychological effects that will reflect in our behaviors and can affect outcomes by our actions.

(16-06-2013 07:16 AM)AyameTan Wrote:  If we expect the worst, then we are practically immune to being disappointed.

Like most everything interesting, it appears to be complicated, controversial and situational. There is some recent provocative support for MeTanYouPale's statement though: Pessimism About the Future May Lead to Longer, Healthier Life, Research Finds, Optimistic older adults face greater risk of disabilities and death, study reports.

(15-06-2013 06:33 AM)AyameTan Wrote:  I must also say this: I find your blase, dismissive attitude offensive.

If you think that's dismissive and offensive you obviously haven't been here long. Bemore's one of the most affable, least offensive and dismissive players here. Better pucker your sphincter now if you plan to stay and play. Tongue

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16-06-2013, 11:21 AM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
(16-06-2013 11:17 AM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(15-06-2013 09:45 AM)Chas Wrote:  There are positive health effects for having a positive outlook, for being reasonable optimistic. And there are positive psychological effects that will reflect in our behaviors and can affect outcomes by our actions.

(16-06-2013 07:16 AM)AyameTan Wrote:  If we expect the worst, then we are practically immune to being disappointed.

Like most everything interesting, it appears to be complicated, controversial and situational. There is some recent provocative support for MeTanYouPale's statement though: Pessimism About the Future May Lead to Longer, Healthier Life, Research Finds, Optimistic older adults face greater risk of disabilities and death, study reports.

(15-06-2013 06:33 AM)AyameTan Wrote:  I must also say this: I find your blase, dismissive attitude offensive.

If you think that's dismissive and offensive you obviously haven't been here long. Bemore's one of the most affable, least offensive and dismissive players here. Better pucker your sphincter now if you plan to stay and play. Tongue

Thanks GM, now I'm depressed. I'll probably live a long, miserable life. Weeping

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16-06-2013, 11:30 AM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
(16-06-2013 11:21 AM)Chas Wrote:  Thanks GM, now I'm depressed. I'll probably live a long, miserable life. Weeping

I wouldn't be too worried just yet, Chas. The study was done on a German population: Forecasting Life Satisfaction Across Adulthood: Benefits of Seeing a Dark Future? I wasn't aware there was such a critter as an optimistic German. The fuck's that even look like. Tongue

As it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
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16-06-2013, 11:35 AM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
(16-06-2013 11:30 AM)GirlyMan Wrote:  I wouldn't be too worried just yet, Chas. The study was done on a German population: Forecasting Life Satisfaction Across Adulthood: Benefits of Seeing a Dark Future? I wasn't aware there was such a critter as an optimistic German. The fuck's that even look like. Tongue

Pfffft! I am German and definitely an optimist! Girl_nails

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16-06-2013, 11:40 AM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
(16-06-2013 11:35 AM)Dom Wrote:  
(16-06-2013 11:30 AM)GirlyMan Wrote:  I wouldn't be too worried just yet, Chas. The study was done on a German population: Forecasting Life Satisfaction Across Adulthood: Benefits of Seeing a Dark Future? I wasn't aware there was such a critter as an optimistic German. The fuck's that even look like. Tongue

Pfffft! I am German and definitely an optimist! Girl_nails

hehehehehe ... I knew that. So now we know what an optimistic German looks like. By all appearances, they are virtually indistinguishable from a rationalist. ... hehehehehe Big Grin

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16-06-2013, 01:04 PM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
Quote:"Our findings revealed that being overly optimistic in predicting a better future was associated with a greater risk of disability and death within the following decade," said lead author Frieder R. Lang, PhD, of the University of Erlangen-Nuremberg in Germany. "Pessimism about the future may encourage people to live more carefully, taking health and safety precautions."

Well hell yeah!

It's a choice - live it up and maybe lose a few years, or live cautiously and live longer - but where's the fun in that?

I do a mix, I take health precautions in that I make sure I eat well. Safety precautions - not so much. I take risks. I thrive on risks. If it does me in some day - I will have a life well lived. I have no ambition to be tottering around in senility anyways.

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16-06-2013, 05:56 PM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
I don't think there is really one way to about this, different things work for different people, choosing to look on the bright-side can make a big difference for some people and some situations, but it will fail terribly in others, not only because control of emotions is only limited, but sometimes because 'looking on the bright side' can literally be bad, we have our emotions for a reason, when you suffer it is because your body is telling you something is wrong, if you 'be happy' instead, then that problem might just get worse.
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16-06-2013, 10:17 PM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
This was reported by the BBC in July 2009:




Quote:Real life
The researchers, led by psychologist Joanne Wood, said: "Repeating positive self-statements may benefit certain people, such as individuals with high self-esteem, but backfire for the very people who need them the most."
However, they say positive thinking can help when it is part of a broader programme of therapy.
Simon Gelsthorpe, a psychologist with Bradford District Care Trust and spokesman for the British Psychological Society, said self-esteem was based on a range of real life factors, and that counselling to build confidence - rather than telling yourself things are better than they are - was the solution.
"These are things like, do you have close family relationships, a wide network of friends, employment and appearance.
"If you're not close to your parents, don't have many friends, are unemployed and are unhappy with your appearance, it might be hard to have high self-esteem.
"But if your experience is the reverse of that it would be much easier to say 'I'm OK' and believe that."

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“That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years?”
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17-06-2013, 03:24 AM
RE: Positive Thinking Garbage
(16-06-2013 11:17 AM)GirlyMan Wrote:  If you think that's dismissive and offensive you obviously haven't been here long. Bemore's one of the most affable, least offensive and dismissive players here. Better pucker your sphincter now if you plan to stay and play. Tongue

I appreciate the words GM but you dont have to apologise for your views Ayamtan as you are entitled to them. If my views are offensive to you Ayamtan then Im afraid I cannot do anything to change that.

After spending a few days mulling this over slowly and occasionally in my head I think it all comes down that word of unreason.... faith.

Faith can blind you as much as it can empower you, it depends on where and when you apply it and to what degree. If you are blindly waiting that your world will become a better place just through thinking things that are outside of your direct control then this is of course probably a futile task. However if you can rationalise and come to your own decision, seeing things for what they actually are as best as you can do... and still wish to follow the optimistic route then I personally see nothing wrong with that.

For no matter how much I use these symbols, to describe symptoms of my existence.
You are your own emphasis.
So I say nothing.

-Bemore.
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