Problems with Christian roommate
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11-01-2015, 12:44 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
(11-01-2015 12:23 PM)Anjele Wrote:  This is the perfect time for you to learn to establish boundaries and to hold them. It will pay off in lots of areas of your life in the years ahead.

The decision is made, you have a semester to go...next time she brings up something you feel is an attack or criticism, tell her so and that you are done with the conversation.

I have some pretty religious friends but the boundaries are clear. We can also talk about religion without it being emotional or overly personal. Some knew me when I belonged to a church and a couple I met after I was an out atheist. It's a respect thing. Your roommate needs to learn that.

Good luck and do well with your studies!

Thank you!

I have set way too many precedents that have allowed her to treat me pretty crappily so I can't even tell a lot of the times if she is outright criticizing me or just treating me how I have let her treat me for so long. It is difficult.

She asks me the same questions every day in what I guess is either her attempting to be friendly or trying to find some spiritual in into my life. My dad suggested that I no longer answer the questions but instead ask her the same questions as my answer. So if she asks: How is school? Instead of saying, its good but I have a lot to do (which usually opens up a criticism about how my studies are not as important as I think they are...even though I want to be a professor and actually LOVE what I do) I should ask: How is school for YOU? Thereby giving her as little information on my life as possible.

I actually feel really guilty for posting this whole ordeal on here. If she read it, what would she think?
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11-01-2015, 01:02 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
(11-01-2015 12:44 PM)historyhistory Wrote:  I actually feel really guilty for posting this whole ordeal on here. If she read it, what would she think?

Dodgy Remember that talk we had about growing a pair?

What she thinks is immaterial. Back to remedial school for you.

“I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man’s reasoning powers are not above the monkey’s.”~Mark Twain
“Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.”~ Ambrose Bierce
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11-01-2015, 01:20 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
(11-01-2015 01:02 PM)Full Circle Wrote:  
(11-01-2015 12:44 PM)historyhistory Wrote:  I actually feel really guilty for posting this whole ordeal on here. If she read it, what would she think?

Dodgy Remember that talk we had about growing a pair?

What she thinks is immaterial. Back to remedial school for you.

Hahaha! Good point!
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11-01-2015, 01:26 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
What would your oh-so-Christian roommate be doing on this website?

Dude, you gotta do what FC said. Being passive is one thing, being a pushover, quite another.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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11-01-2015, 01:33 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
(11-01-2015 01:26 PM)Anjele Wrote:  What would your oh-so-Christian roommate be doing on this website?

Dude, you gotta do what FC said. Being passive is one thing, being a pushover, quite another.

I recommend red paint for the pentagram. Big Grin
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11-01-2015, 01:39 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
If you rent, then you should consider moving out and finding other roomates somewhere else. If you own the house then you can provide legal notice(in most locals you cant simply kick someone out) And tell them they have to move out by the deadline are be removed by law enforcement.

Whatever you do do it legally. Oh and regardless of what issues are causing problems, it does not have to be about religion. If something is causing you stress to the point you cannot function you need to work on communicating in a civil manor collectively or recognize that it simply is not working out. No one has the right to suck the life out of you, but you also do not have the right to force them to submit to you either. It does not have to be a power struggle. It just has to be a problem solving issue, and sometimes in any relationship it is not always good to force it.

Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37
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11-01-2015, 01:44 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
(11-01-2015 05:58 AM)Mathilda Wrote:  
(10-01-2015 10:01 PM)historyhistory Wrote:  She is constantly telling me that I live a miserable life without a moral basis or the hope for happiness, even though I try to explain that I am very happy and also try very hard to act compassionately towards others. Once she asked me (I kid you not) "if you have no fear of divine punishment, why don't you just kill your family?" no answer was good enough for her moral stance.

Just reply with a condescending smile and words like "Sure, whatever" or "Yes dear".

There's no point arguing with her, she won't see reason. If you try to reason with her then she will think that she can convince you otherwise. If everytime she tries to argue with you she feels silly then she may be less inclined to continue.

I like to pretend like I'm excitedly in agreeance, followed by a bible quote "... Like in __:__, where it says _____." And make it the most obviously fucked up example of christian morality possible. Bonus points if it's relevant to the topic.
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11-01-2015, 02:46 PM
RE: Problems with Christian roommate
Just stay away from her off she ever loses HER faith. .. apparently you're good as dead then
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