Quick Easter questions
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23-06-2017, 11:04 PM
RE: Quick Easter questions
(23-06-2017 10:52 PM)jennybee Wrote:  Jesus is busy racking up his frequent flyer miles so he can come back and visit us from Heaven.

Ah, that's why he's late -- he keeps cashing in the points for small appliances and tunes to put on his iGod. Big Grin

I'm sorry, but your beliefs are much too silly to take seriously. Got anything else we can discuss?
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23-06-2017, 11:21 PM
RE: Quick Easter questions
In, On The Historicity of Jesus, Richard Carrier points out an oddity. The way jesus freaks tell it there were xtians walking around claiming that their boy was back from the dead and talking to his followers. Yet, the authorities who presumably would be interested in a guy who apparently escaped justice and was still the same threat as he was before evince no interest in finding the body or apprehending him if alive.
For people who were so gung ho to nail the mother fucker up the Sanhedrin seems curiously derelict in the aftermath.

Atheism is NOT a Religion. It's A Personal Relationship With Reality!
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23-06-2017, 11:27 PM
Quick Easter questions
(23-06-2017 10:48 PM)Astreja Wrote:  
(23-06-2017 07:25 PM)KUSA Wrote:  He most likely has been dying on other planets for the sins of aliens. No telling which one he will come from.

So don't wait up, then?


I wouldn't. He's very busy so it will be a while.
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24-06-2017, 07:29 AM
RE: Quick Easter questions
It almost sounds like the Terminator might be a jesus fable retold.
"I'll be back" - thick German accent

Skynet. End of the world.

We need some heroes to stop jesus.
We'll go back in time, grab him after he's crucified and make sure he never returns.

Insanity - doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results
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24-06-2017, 07:30 AM
RE: Quick Easter questions
(24-06-2017 07:29 AM)Rahn127 Wrote:  It almost sounds like the Terminator might be a jesus fable retold.
"I'll be back" - thick German accent

Skynet. End of the world.

We need some heroes to stop jesus.
We'll go back in time, grab him after he's crucified and make sure he never returns.

Just put a giant stone in front of his tomb...oh wait.. Wink
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24-06-2017, 07:53 AM
RE: Quick Easter questions
(24-06-2017 07:29 AM)Rahn127 Wrote:  It almost sounds like the Terminator might be a jesus fable retold.
"I'll be back" - thick German accent

Skynet. End of the world.

We need some heroes to stop jesus.
We'll go back in time, grab him after he's crucified and make sure he never returns.

Nononono. We need to REPROGRAM Jesus to save us from a more advanced model of messiah.
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24-06-2017, 08:38 AM
RE: Quick Easter questions
Jesus is an alien that travels between inhabited planets spreading the message of peace and love. This is what he looks like in his natural form:

[Image: species_reference_sheet__space_bunnies_b...8njos6.png]

He had to fake a birth story and a death story because he was actually beamed down from his spaceship and then back up again from inside the tomb.

This is what his ship looks like (notice the "cross like" symbol on his ship, it's the symbol for his planet of origin:

[Image: zamora1.jpg]

He goes away for hundreds of years at a time because there are so many inhabited worlds in his patrol zone. But he has been back at least once since his "death & resurrection"

This is a top secret photo smuggled out of area 51 showing him emerging from his escape pod after the US military destroyed his ship in orbit:

[Image: 1411501383657_wps_49_image003_png.jpg]

He has since faked his death again after a rescue ship from his home planet was able to come get him:

[Image: original.jpg]

But don't worry, he'll be back.

A friend in the hole

"If we're going to be damned, let's be damned for what we really are." - Captain Picard
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24-06-2017, 08:48 AM
RE: Quick Easter questions
(23-06-2017 11:04 PM)Astreja Wrote:  tunes to put on his iGod. Big Grin

[Image: 006_CreativeJuice_30092009_FamigliaCrist...LERY05.jpg]

Serious answer - he ascended or some such shit, didn't he? So, I guess, some folk are waiting for him to descend or something.

SpaceXtianity Rolleyes

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24-06-2017, 08:49 AM
RE: Quick Easter questions
[Image: 97dc60569878bae013949667c710745b.jpg]

"Theology made no provision for evolution. The biblical authors had missed the most important revelation of all! Could it be that they were not really privy to the thoughts of God?" - E. O. Wilson
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24-06-2017, 09:48 AM
RE: Quick Easter questions
(23-06-2017 06:41 PM)Rahn127 Wrote:  If he returned from the dead, where is he ?

This is the crux of a major problem that Christians have. Did people who lived prior to the arrival of Jesus have any opportunity to be saved? Noah and the 7 members of his immediate family were allowed to survive the Flood. Didn't God single Noah out because he was a good man? Shouldn't he therefore have been saved? But how could he be saved if he never accepted Jesus as his personal Savior?

To fix this problem Christians invented the idea that after his resurrection Jesus descended into Hell to provide the Good News to the dead. This would mean that at the time of the eventual Last Judgment everyone who ever lived would have had a chance to hear the Good News, and therefore everyone who ever lived would have the opportunity to be saved.

So imagine that you were a pagan who died 300 years before Jesus, and imagine that you had lived a life of crime and depravity. Then when the Last Judgment happens Jesus asks you if you ever believed in him. Why would you say "No"?

To specifically answer the question of "where is he", according to Matthew 17 he was transfigured-- before the very eyes of the Disciples-- and was lifted up into Heaven.
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