Racist Granny?
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10-08-2013, 05:45 PM
RE: Racist Granny?
(10-08-2013 05:27 PM)Hobbitgirl Wrote:  
(10-08-2013 05:20 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  I was thinking that too. My friend's nana was just about the sweetest person alive...until dementia. Then she was horrible, paranoid, racist....just a horrible person to be around who would just suck the life out of the room.

I don't know if they secretly believed that....or if it was completely delusional. My grandma would call and ask me when my mom was coming to take her to the doctor...and tell me her brothers had scared away an armed gunman with oranges and watermelons. My mom had been gone for 20 years....her brothers, oh gosh between like 25 and 50 years...

My grandma would also hit nurses -- pull hair....

I'm sorry to hear that, dementias are hard. Sad

Don't feel too bad about the nurses. It is VERY normal for people to become aggressive, Usually it stems from fear of not knowing what's going on, and the nurses totally get that and are prepared for it. Smile

I had a gentleman one time flip dining room tables to hide behind. Because the gunmen were here to kill him. I sat with him on the floor behind the tables talking him down for about 45 minutes.

There was a woman who would warn me against those "thieving blimey N words" who would come in at night and steal her things.

I also had a man sucker punch me in the face several times suddenly while helping him change his clothes. This man had a plaque hanging in his room talking about how he had been the president of the optimist's club.

Many more stories like that, Its very common.

Yes, it's really sad because my friend's nana was living alone for a long time -- family didn't want to get involved or didn't want to believe it was that bad -- until she went missing.

My grandma had to be dragged -- they found her wandering outside the assisted living place she was living at and then moved her into the "memory ward". I was just glad it wasn't a place she could wander away from easily.

It's got to be hard on nurses tho too. Those people were lucky to have someone like you Smile


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Wind's in the east, a mist coming in
Like something is brewing and about to begin
Can't put my finger on what lies in store
but I feel what's to happen has happened before...


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10-08-2013, 06:50 PM
RE: Racist Granny?
For me, if I saw signs of Alzheimers in me, I would get ready to take the big exit before I get so bad that I can't live alone.

For some people the decline is quite fast, some take many years. So a precise diagnosis would be necessary. But I would definitely bail, what a horrible life.

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11-08-2013, 01:08 AM (This post was last modified: 11-08-2013 01:13 AM by Dark Light.)
RE: Racist Granny?
My great-grandmother was even more verbal about it. She didn't "hate" other races, but she certainly thought of non-whites as inferior. When I was a boy, I took a trip with her to the supermarket. In the next checkout line over was an elderly black woman. My grandma blurted out very loudly "We used to sell chickens to that nigger's family when I was a girl". Very awkward for me, but she didn't give it a second thought. What can you do, really? I would probably try and ignore her, but you'd be well within your rights to say what you felt. The old lady is probably just a remnant of a time that has largely passed. Good luck!

My paternal grandmother wasn't racist, nor did she feel superior to other races, but she was still sometimes almost as bad. It seems she never got the memo that the word "colored" was no longer considered acceptable. She had a good heart though, and I suppose that's what counts.

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11-08-2013, 01:42 AM
RE: Racist Granny?
(11-08-2013 01:08 AM)Dark Light Wrote:  My great-grandmother was even more verbal about it. She didn't "hate" other races, but she certainly thought of non-whites as inferior. When I was a boy, I took a trip with her to the supermarket. In the next checkout line over was an elderly black woman. My grandma blurted out very loudly "We used to sell chickens to that nigger's family when I was a girl". Very awkward for me, but she didn't give it a second thought. What can you do, really? I would probably try and ignore her, but you'd be well within your rights to say what you felt. The old lady is probably just a remnant of a time that has largely passed. Good luck!

My paternal grandmother wasn't racist, nor did she feel superior to other races, but she was still sometimes almost as bad. It seems she never got the memo that the word "colored" was no longer considered acceptable. She had a good heart though, and I suppose that's what counts.

I consider thinking anyone is "inferior" hateful, but that's just me. As for I out dated terms I try to give eldery people the benefit of the doubt until I can figure out if they are being malicious, as I've had a professor refer to me as handicapped and cripple (he was 78). But my original question was should they be called out their bullshit like any other racist age aside. As I tend to just say "oh they're old leave them be". However if someone in the prime of their youth said "you fat mulatto","nappy-headed hippie",or "uppity northern nigger" as my neighbor so often does I'd call the police (fearing bodily harm) or one of my friends would slap them.
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11-08-2013, 01:52 AM
RE: Racist Granny?
(11-08-2013 01:42 AM)BrokenQuill92 Wrote:  
(11-08-2013 01:08 AM)Dark Light Wrote:  My great-grandmother was even more verbal about it. She didn't "hate" other races, but she certainly thought of non-whites as inferior. When I was a boy, I took a trip with her to the supermarket. In the next checkout line over was an elderly black woman. My grandma blurted out very loudly "We used to sell chickens to that nigger's family when I was a girl". Very awkward for me, but she didn't give it a second thought. What can you do, really? I would probably try and ignore her, but you'd be well within your rights to say what you felt. The old lady is probably just a remnant of a time that has largely passed. Good luck!

My paternal grandmother wasn't racist, nor did she feel superior to other races, but she was still sometimes almost as bad. It seems she never got the memo that the word "colored" was no longer considered acceptable. She had a good heart though, and I suppose that's what counts.

I consider thinking anyone is "inferior" hateful, but that's just me. As for I out dated terms I try to give eldery people the benefit of the doubt until I can figure out if they are being malicious, as I've had a professor refer to me as handicapped and cripple (he was 78). But my original question was should they be called out their bullshit like any other racist age aside. As I tend to just say "oh they're old leave them be". However if someone in the prime of their youth said "you fat mulatto","nappy-headed hippie",or "uppity northern nigger" as my neighbor so often does I'd call the police (fearing bodily harm) or one of my friends would slap them.


What I meant was this. My racist granny didn't have ill will towards non-whites, but she did think of them as inferior to whites. In a twisted way, you could make the comparison to an animal and a human. That is kind of the way some supremacists think. You can think of yourself as superior to an animal without hating the animal. I ain't saying this is 'okay' for the record, just explaining what I meant.

As for your situation, if you feel that you are being threatened, you should certainly let the authorities be aware of what's happening. From your description I didn't get that vibe, but if that's the case then don't hesitate. Let someone know immediately. Once again, good luck.

On a side note, I wasn't aware that the word "handicapped" is no longer an appropriate word. Is mulatto faux pas as well? Obviously, I am ignorant on this subject as well.

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11-08-2013, 02:20 AM
RE: Racist Granny?
(11-08-2013 01:52 AM)Dark Light Wrote:  
(11-08-2013 01:42 AM)BrokenQuill92 Wrote:  I consider thinking anyone is "inferior" hateful, but that's just me. As for I out dated terms I try to give eldery people the benefit of the doubt until I can figure out if they are being malicious, as I've had a professor refer to me as handicapped and cripple (he was 78). But my original question was should they be called out their bullshit like any other racist age aside. As I tend to just say "oh they're old leave them be". However if someone in the prime of their youth said "you fat mulatto","nappy-headed hippie",or "uppity northern nigger" as my neighbor so often does I'd call the police (fearing bodily harm) or one of my friends would slap them.


What I meant was this. My racist granny didn't have ill will towards non-whites, but she did think of them as inferior to whites. In a twisted way, you could make the comparison to an animal and a human. That is kind of the way some supremacists think. You can think of yourself as superior to an animal without hating the animal. I ain't saying this is 'okay' for the record, just explaining what I meant.

As for your situation, if you feel that you are being threatened, you should certainly let the authorities be aware of what's happening. From your description I didn't get that vibe, but if that's the case then don't hesitate. Let someone know immediately. Once again, good luck.

On a side note, I wasn't aware that the word "handicapped" is no longer an appropriate word. Is mulatto faux pas as well? Obviously, I am ignorant on this subject as well.
Disabled, visually-impaired, and blind are accepted terms and most mixed race people have personal preferences but mulatto is almost always an insult. There are some people usually older who still use it. Because I don't want go through the fuss I tell people I'm black, a lot of people do, less explain.
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11-08-2013, 02:33 AM
RE: Racist Granny?
Hmm...well up until now I have used mulatto, but with no malice. I wasn't aware it was offensive, or that it had negative connotations. There aren't exactly a lot of people that are half-black half-white that I know.

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11-08-2013, 02:43 AM
RE: Racist Granny?
And no I'm not afraid of the old bat.
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11-08-2013, 02:52 AM
RE: Racist Granny?
(11-08-2013 02:43 AM)BrokenQuill92 Wrote:  And no I'm not afraid of the old bat.

In that case, I think the best retribution is just being productive and successful.

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11-08-2013, 02:58 AM
RE: Racist Granny?
(11-08-2013 02:20 AM)BrokenQuill92 Wrote:  Disabled, visually-impaired, and blind are accepted terms and most mixed race people have personal preferences but mulatto is almost always an insult. There are some people usually older who still use it. Because I don't want go through the fuss I tell people I'm black, a lot of people do, less explain.

Dairy Queen (aka The Texas Stop Sign, for their ubiquity on highways) has a frozen coffee drink called a Moo-Late. I feel ashamed every time I see it on the menu. My wife loves their dipped cones as a road-trip treat, though, so I can't exactly boycott them. I just claim I'm not hungry when we stop there.

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