Random observations about theists
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06-06-2011, 11:02 AM
Random observations about theists
I notice things in my continued observation and I would like to put them on the screen in print form in the event I die from unexpectedly from a swarm of ninja babies.

[Image: ninjababy.jpg]



That's the best part about internet forums. Every post is like a published book and you're the esteemed author. Except you don't make any money off it and it's much gayer.


So numero uno on Buddy's Listo con Queso:

Theists always make sure to include the "Dr." title before their name.

As if to convince people that they really are educated. "I know what I'm saying is gibberish, but look, I'm a REAL doctor!"

Seriously. All of the great atheist debaters have doctorates in several degrees, but when was the last time you heard the term Dr. Sam Harris? And his PhD is in neuroscience for Spaghetti Monster's sake. And yet, when have you ever heard a debate between someone and plain ol' Kent Hovind? Nope. Always Dr. Kent Hovind. What's his doctorate in, you ask? "Christian education" which he received from a non-accredited Baptist college. Wheeee.

Any time there's a theism debate between Someone and a Dr. Someone Else, check and see which side felt the need to adorn their name with titles.



Now I forgot what the other things on my list were going to be. Fantastic.

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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06-06-2011, 12:17 PM
RE: Random observations about theists
Ah, I remembered another observation.


Atheists are held to unattainable standards while theists get a free pass.


If one atheist anywhere does something immoral, it is a testament to the nature of all atheists everywhere, yet a worldwide priest pedophile story comes out, and we are all supposed to look the other way.

"Oh THOSE priests were just bad men."

Really? Cause they were priests, you know. One of the highest standards you can attain in the religious world. And it wasn't a handful here and there. There were thousands of outed priests in America alone.

The same people who support the Jerry Falwells and Pat Robertsons of the world calling me immoral; tis the epitome of hypocrisy.


And it's not just Christianity. All the horrors of radical Islam and the ongoing terrorist acts taking place between the Israelis and Palestinians, all swept under the big religious rug.

"Did you hear about the activist group that blew up a car in a crowded market and killed 30 people because of their beliefs?"

"That's just terrible, the members of that group should be arrested and tried for accessory to murder."

"Wait no, it wasn't activists, it was a bunch of Muslim extremists."

"Oh well nevermind, that's different."

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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06-06-2011, 05:57 PM
 
RE: Random observations about theists
Theists tend to be the ones playing the 'that hurts my feelings' card.
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06-06-2011, 06:13 PM
 
RE: Random observations about theists
I stopped being surprised by things Theists do, when I just let it sink in that they think something that doesn't exist loves them. After that, they're capable of doing or believing anything.
Like Dr. Laura. All around stereotypical bigot on every front. I once heard her say, when she had her radio program hot and heavy on many stations from here to Florida and as I was making a road trip from Tampa to Virginia, that a woman caller who's husband put her in the hospital numerous occasions, two of which had her revived from being clinically dead, that she had to remain in the marriage regardless of the chronic spousal abuse she suffered. (I wonder if she's alive today? Sad )

No, divorce was not permitted under god's law, as she'd called Dr.Laura for the advice about that. Laura told this woman that she had sworn an oath before the altar of god on her wedding day to remain with this man until death us do part, and that's the covenant she made with the lord until that day arrives.
Sure enough, it shall because the man has almost succeeded in that condition of the marriage covenant twice now.

She's a buffoon. And she's a Doctor. Of what? Physiology!
Not psychology, not psychiatry, not psychotherapy.Her PhD is in Physiology.
And boy is she religious! Rolleyes


[Image: ninjababy.jpg]
We've heard of Al Qaeda. Now prepare for, Al Diapa! Tongue

Soooo cute.
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06-06-2011, 06:19 PM
RE: Random observations about theists
Another one to add that resembles the one before this one is:

Atheists must all have PhDs in biology, astronomy, and paleontology or else Theism is correct.


Happens every time I argue with a theist. I spend 20 minutes going over natural selection, evolution, fossils, plate tectonics, the universe, the speed of light in relation to star distance, cosmic microwave background, and DNA mutations. Then we play the child's game of "what happened before that... what happened before that?" until I go, "I don't know, I'm not a quantum physicist."

And of course they go "AHA! You can't explain such and such, so therefore a telepathic magician and his zombie son remain the ONLY logical explanation."


And yet I have to sit there and listen to them bumble through the theory of evolution like a child trying to explain string theory and I can't say a thing, from fear of being "closed minded."

It's like a retarded child going "mama, 2nd Law of Thermodynamics and I pooped my pants!" You just pat him on the head, give him a Good Job sticker, and send him on over to Fox News so they can teach him more talking points to parrot... and a job.

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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06-06-2011, 06:26 PM
RE: Random observations about theists
I get the 'close-minded' argument all the time. I have to listen to people (family members) go on that there is CLEARLY a God yet as soon as I mention Spaghetti Monster (which doesn't count as a valid argument in any form according to certain family members) or point out that religious belief is clearly nonsensical I am branded as immature/close-minded/confrontational etc. It does my fucking head in!

Best and worst of Ferdinand .....
Best
Ferdinand: We don't really say 'theist' in Alabama. Here, you're either a Christian, or you're from Afghanistan and we fucking hate you.
Worst
Ferdinand: Everyone from British is so, like, fucking retarded.
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06-06-2011, 06:36 PM
RE: Random observations about theists
I guess I can add that to the list since it's certainly true.

Challenging a theist's beliefs or even just asserting your own frightens them, so they become offended and label you "confrontational, closed-minded, and angry."


T - "So you see, the Bible says this and we know it to be true because the Bible says so."

A - "But that's circular logic!"

T - "It's not circular logic because God is outside of the boundaries of circular logic."

A - [Image: 1892_mad_smiley_banging_head_against_a_brick_wall.gif]

T - "Why are you so angry and confrontational all the time? You should stop being so closed-minded and consider theories besides evolution."

A - "Alright, let's talk about Exogenesis, the belief that life originated elsewhere in the universe and spread to earth via meteorites."

T - "No that's stupid. Plus that's not mentioned anywhere in the Bible."

A - [Image: th_suicide.gif]

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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06-06-2011, 07:25 PM
RE: Random observations about theists
(06-06-2011 06:36 PM)Buddy Christ Wrote:  I guess I can add that to the list since it's certainly true.

Challenging a theist's beliefs or even just asserting your own frightens them, so they become offended and label you "confrontational, closed-minded, and angry."


T - "So you see, the Bible says this and we know it to be true because the Bible says so."

A - "But that's circular logic!"

T - "It's not circular logic because God is outside of the boundaries of circular logic."

A - [Image: 1892_mad_smiley_banging_head_against_a_brick_wall.gif]

T - "Why are you so angry and confrontational all the time? You should stop being so closed-minded and consider theories besides evolution."

A - "Alright, let's talk about Exogenesis, the belief that life originated elsewhere in the universe and spread to earth via meteorites."

T - "No that's stupid. Plus that's not mentioned anywhere in the Bible."

A - [Image: th_suicide.gif]

I was going to ask where you got those wonderful smilies until I went to reply and remembered I can see it here. So... instead I'll say that you seem like a pretty funny guy and well informed which is nice. Thanks for being alive I guess.Huh

"I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments." -Jim Morrison
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06-06-2011, 07:41 PM
RE: Random observations about theists
(06-06-2011 06:19 PM)Buddy Christ Wrote:  Atheists must all have PhDs in biology, astronomy, and paleontology or else Theism is correct.

One appropriate response is to first get a Government job and then make the bastards collectively pay for your continuing education. ... just sayin'.

P.S. You will still have to listen to them bitch about that later. But there's no getting around that.

As it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
I will show you fear in a handful of dust.
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10-06-2011, 12:30 PM
RE: Random observations about theists
Goes with the whole "open-minded" comment.





"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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