Ranting corner
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02-02-2016, 04:32 PM
RE: Ranting corner
Thanks guys.
I've largely gotten over myself now. On the way there now, just have a pit in my gut and a slight tight feel it in my throat. Better than before, right?
My mother assigned my brother to tag along hoping it would dull the anxiety, which it did I guess, though his own issues got to him and we had to part ways early in the trip.

I still don't want to today, today.

The people closely associated with the namesake of female canines are suffering from a nondescript form of lunacy.
"Anti-environmentalism is like standing in front of a forest and going 'quick kill them they're coming right for us!'" - Jake Farr-Wharton, The Imaginary Friend Show.
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02-02-2016, 04:35 PM
RE: Ranting corner
I sorta just woke up and I need to go get lunch from that Chinese place soonish because if I leave it too late the place is absolutely packed (as in can't actually get to the food) with Chinese people. Like 150 Asians and me 1 white dude. ><. Happened the other day, I felt so out of place. That must be like how DLJ felt.
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02-02-2016, 04:36 PM
RE: Ranting corner
(02-02-2016 04:32 PM)Free Thought Wrote:  Thanks guys.
I've largely gotten over myself now. On the way there now, just have a pit in my gut and a slight tight feel it in my throat. Better than before, right?
My mother assigned my brother to tag along hoping it would dull the anxiety, which it did I guess, though his own issues got to him and we had to part ways early in the trip.

I still don't want to today, today.

There are those days when todaying is the hardest thing you'll do. Hug

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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02-02-2016, 04:58 PM
RE: Ranting corner
(02-02-2016 04:35 PM)earmuffs Wrote:  I sorta just woke up and I need to go get lunch from that Chinese place soonish because if I leave it too late the place is absolutely packed (as in can't actually get to the food) with Chinese people. Like 150 Asians and me 1 white dude. ><. Happened the other day, I felt so out of place. That must be like how DLJ felt.

I went to a fund raiser once, I was 19 or 20, with my supervisor who was also my friend. we walked into a room full of black people (300 or so) and I the only white peep there. I told her, "You could've warned me." She smiled, "I could've." I said, "I feel like a zit." She laughed, I laughed, the guy next to me who heard me laughed. I was uncomfortable for about 10 minutes, then it was nothing.

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03-02-2016, 10:10 AM
RE: Ranting corner
Guess who's completely done being tolerant toward some double standards and regressive bull shit! I AM!
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03-02-2016, 10:34 AM
RE: Ranting corner
Good friend's father died.

It wasn't an unexpected death, but no matter how well you try to prepare yourself, it's still a shock.


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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03-02-2016, 10:34 AM
RE: Ranting corner
(02-02-2016 04:32 PM)Free Thought Wrote:  Thanks guys.
I've largely gotten over myself now. On the way there now, just have a pit in my gut and a slight tight feel it in my throat. Better than before, right?
My mother assigned my brother to tag along hoping it would dull the anxiety, which it did I guess, though his own issues got to him and we had to part ways early in the trip.

I still don't want to today, today.
*Hugs*
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03-02-2016, 10:36 AM
RE: Ranting corner
(02-02-2016 04:32 PM)Free Thought Wrote:  Thanks guys.
I've largely gotten over myself now. On the way there now, just have a pit in my gut and a slight tight feel it in my throat. Better than before, right?
My mother assigned my brother to tag along hoping it would dull the anxiety, which it did I guess, though his own issues got to him and we had to part ways early in the trip.

I still don't want to today, today.

How did it go?


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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03-02-2016, 02:13 PM
RE: Ranting corner
(03-02-2016 10:34 AM)Nishi Karano Kaze Wrote:  
(02-02-2016 04:32 PM)Free Thought Wrote:  Thanks guys.
I've largely gotten over myself now. On the way there now, just have a pit in my gut and a slight tight feel it in my throat. Better than before, right?
My mother assigned my brother to tag along hoping it would dull the anxiety, which it did I guess, though his own issues got to him and we had to part ways early in the trip.

I still don't want to today, today.
*Hugs*

(03-02-2016 10:36 AM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  
(02-02-2016 04:32 PM)Free Thought Wrote:  Thanks guys.
I've largely gotten over myself now. On the way there now, just have a pit in my gut and a slight tight feel it in my throat. Better than before, right?
My mother assigned my brother to tag along hoping it would dull the anxiety, which it did I guess, though his own issues got to him and we had to part ways early in the trip.

I still don't want to today, today.

How did it go?

I'll stop filling this thread and go on where it belongs

The people closely associated with the namesake of female canines are suffering from a nondescript form of lunacy.
"Anti-environmentalism is like standing in front of a forest and going 'quick kill them they're coming right for us!'" - Jake Farr-Wharton, The Imaginary Friend Show.
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03-02-2016, 03:04 PM
RE: Ranting corner
Option 1. Stay in the ED for a while. My coworkers are awesome. However, the acuity is really low. Apparently full arrests are extremely rare. It will be at least six months before I'm on trauma beds, the only place I would get really sick patients. The only challenge in my day is patient turnover - so being a fast charter. I use only a tiny bit of critical thinking - dealing with interns means questioning orders on occasion. The ED does nothing for me if I decide to go back to CRNA school, and it's looking that way. I feel funny about leaving a job I just started, though. Doesn't look so great. Don't get to see my son more.

Option 2. Return to CVICU. My educator and I crossed paths as I was leaving work the other day - she ran up and hugged me, told me she missed me, and that I could come back any time. This unit WOULD do a lot for my career. I get to play with sick patients. I get to use my critical thinking skills - I enjoy the intellectual challenge that keeps my patients alive. It sucks giving bed baths, though. I also don't like a lot of the coworkers, but no big deal - the Wellbutrin helps. My boyfriend works there...but so does the guy that I fooled around with one night last year. Although, again, not too big of a deal, might just be uncomfortable the first time we all cross paths. This unit gets me into any grad school of my choice. Don't get to see my son more.

Option 3. Return to North Alabama and start in one of their ICUs. Really big pros - I would see my son more and not pay child support, also would get my debt under control the fastest. Cons - I hate the hospital. I would be living with my parents again and attending church to satisfy their requirements for living under their roof. I love my mother, but she reaaaaallly stresses me out. I would have to end things with my boyfriend, and things are going really well now - he is also wanting to do CRNA school. If I were to live with my boyfriend I could get my debt paid off really quickly that way, too. As well as practically walk to school from his house. Leaving definitely takes that option off the plate.

I don't know what to do and it's stressing me out. I thought I had decided to go home, but sheesh. I guess what it really boils down to is do I end things with the man I'm in love with, start a new job again and live with my parents in order to see my son more, OR switch back to my old unit and deal with all of the uncomfortableness involved with that as well as no improvement with how often I see my son, but get to keep the boyfriend and put myself back in a great position for grad school.

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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