Scars
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14-05-2014, 07:53 AM
RE: Scars
you needz hugz
Hug

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14-05-2014, 07:54 AM
RE: Scars
You are a beautiful person Anjie...period.

"People call these things imperfections, but they're not...they're the good stuff".

Forgive me for sharing this personal story, but I think it may help a little.

When I run my hand over my wife's scars, I remember to the moment how she got them. I remember how I felt thinking they would have to amputate her hand below the elbow because it was so horribly mangled as I held her in my arms while the paramedics arrived and all the while using my body to shield her eyes from her horrible injury...the arm and wrist broken so badly it made the letter Z.

Sometimes now, years later, I run my fingers over the scars and I fall even deeper in love with her. We survived that...together, we survived that. No one else in the world knows what those moments and days were like but us, and it makes us stronger.

These scars are what makes you you Anj, and I think that for those who love you they're the "good stuff".

I send you many Hug

“I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man’s reasoning powers are not above the monkey’s.”~Mark Twain
“Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.”~ Ambrose Bierce
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14-05-2014, 07:57 AM
RE: Scars
(14-05-2014 07:54 AM)Full Circle Wrote:  You are a beautiful person Anjie...period.

"People call these things imperfections, but they're not...they're the good stuff".

Forgive me for sharing this personal story, but I think it may help a little.

When I run my hand over my wife's scars, I remember to the moment how she got them. I remember how I felt thinking they would have to amputate her hand below the elbow because it was so horribly mangled as I held her in my arms while the paramedics arrived and all the while using my body to shield her eyes from her horrible injury...the arm and wrist broken so badly it made the letter Z.

Sometimes now, years later, I run my fingers over the scars and I fall even deeper in love with her. We survived that...together, we survived that. No one else in the world knows what those moments and days were like but us, and it makes us stronger.

These scars are what makes you you Anj, and I think that for those who love you they're the "good stuff".

I send you many Hug

that is so beautiful! and it made me burst into tears. Heart


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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14-05-2014, 10:13 AM
RE: Scars
Thanks again guys. I am still weepy this morning.

When I saw those women standing with their shirts off, their scars exposed - it broke something inside of me. I can count on my two hands how many times someone has seen my scars other than medical personnel. And, yes, that includes my husband. I seldom look at them myself other then for inspection to look for issues as my doctors have instructed. I am not a vain person - I am a jeans and T-shirt kind of a girl who wears minimal makeup and almost no jewelry. But there are issues with the reconstruction and scars that bring up really old deep hurts.

I suppose on top of it all and making it worse are the dental issues I have been battling for nearly a month. My face is swollen again and I have to go to a specialist tomorrow in the hope that he can fix it...then I have to take my final tomorrow night. The physical exhaustion and pain probably added to the mental mess I became when I watched that show.

I have battled most of the BC on my own and in my own head. I have seldom asked for help and I don't even know what that help would or could be. Fuck - tears again. I appreciate you guys more than I can ever say.

Time to pull myself together...get this tooth taken care of, get through this final (that I can't even concentrate to study for), get ready to start my new job Monday, and figure out how to stop weeping. I am overwhelmed and can't find my usual strength...I am not used to feeling weak. And I fucking hate it.

Much love to all of you.
A

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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14-05-2014, 10:33 AM
RE: Scars
(14-05-2014 10:13 AM)Anjele Wrote:  Thanks again guys. I am still weepy this morning.

When I saw those women standing with their shirts off, their scars exposed - it broke something inside of me. I can count on my two hands how many times someone has seen my scars other than medical personnel. And, yes, that includes my husband. I seldom look at them myself other then for inspection to look for issues as my doctors have instructed. I am not a vain person - I am a jeans and T-shirt kind of a girl who wears minimal makeup and almost no jewelry. But there are issues with the reconstruction and scars that bring up really old deep hurts.

I suppose on top of it all and making it worse are the dental issues I have been battling for nearly a month. My face is swollen again and I have to go to a specialist tomorrow in the hope that he can fix it...then I have to take my final tomorrow night. The physical exhaustion and pain probably added to the mental mess I became when I watched that show.

I have battled most of the BC on my own and in my own head. I have seldom asked for help and I don't even know what that help would or could be. Fuck - tears again. I appreciate you guys more than I can ever say.

Time to pull myself together...get this tooth taken care of, get through this final (that I can't even concentrate to study for), get ready to start my new job Monday, and figure out how to stop weeping. I am overwhelmed and can't find my usual strength...I am not used to feeling weak. And I fucking hate it.

Much love to all of you.
A

When shit piles up, the defenses I have carefully built sometimes crumble under the combined weight.

It's temporary, and I think it strengthens me for the next time. Because, sadly, there's always a next time.

A couple of times, I have been reduced to wracking sobs by it, but it passes.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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14-05-2014, 12:33 PM
RE: Scars
I don't say it enough...

I love and appreciate all of you.

Thanks guys, I will get my shit together and get through this. It's just going to really, really suck till I do.

Off to pick up pain meds and hopefully take a nap.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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14-05-2014, 12:35 PM
RE: Scars
I think a lot of woman place so much of their self worth in their bodies. To be a woman is be beautiful, to be sexy, to be a mother, and breast cancer can be a blow to all of them. For what its worth, I thought the woman on ink master were still beautiful ladies. A woman isn't only sexy for their breasts, their feminine curves, soft skin, big lips and bright eyes are all still there. More importantly, a sharp wit and a good sense of humor can certainly survive a surgery. You don't love yourself for your body and none of the people closes to you do either. And fuck western culture and the inherent misogyny, you are still a woman with or without nipples.
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14-05-2014, 01:07 PM
RE: Scars
'So now we've come upon the hardest thing I've ever done
It's telling you that I'm a mess
What sort of mess i mean
Is self-destructive gasoline
The kind that strips you of your best...

...Stand by for another breakdown
Sound off the alarm...'


Lyrics excerpts from Chameleon Boy by Blue October - where my head is right now.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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14-05-2014, 01:15 PM
RE: Scars
Survival mode - good.
You're doing what you know - you've stripped it down.
Tooth = immediate need.
Final = immediate need.
Everything you don't need to immediately deal with ... needs to be on it's own. Fuck anyone who tells you they need something from you. You need any and all time for you.

Only do what you can at any given moment.
If you need to cry ... then, that means you need to cry.

Heart Hang on, Anj.

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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14-05-2014, 01:34 PM
RE: Scars
(14-05-2014 01:15 PM)kim Wrote:  Survival mode - good.
You're doing what you know - you've stripped it down.
Tooth = immediate need.
Final = immediate need.
Everything you don't need to immediately deal with ... needs to be on it's own. Fuck anyone who tells you they need something from you. You need any and all time for you.

Only do what you can at any given moment.
If you need to cry ... then, that means you need to cry.

Heart Hang on, Anj.

Thanks Kim...got some pain meds...took two.

Going to try to study till I can sleep.

Going to recharge and reload the iPod...a must for dental work and get this shit done a piece at a time.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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