Secular Wedding
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08-06-2015, 04:31 PM
Secular Wedding
Me and the fiance are getting married next year--if we can iron out the details. The biggest detail being that we want a completely secular wedding, and living in Kansas, when we say that we are looked at like we are lepers. We're wanting something outside and want to find some kind of officiant that will perform a secular ceremony. And we don't want a preacher that will judgmentally perform the wedding "out of the goodness of his god-fearing heart."

So, do any of you have experience with setting up a secular ceremony? I need some advice/instructions. I have had zero success so far. It seems it's harder to get married as an atheist here than it is to for a gay couple to get married.
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08-06-2015, 04:36 PM
RE: Secular Wedding
(08-06-2015 04:31 PM)jaguar3030 Wrote:  Me and the fiance are getting married next year--if we can iron out the details. The biggest detail being that we want a completely secular wedding, and living in Kansas, when we say that we are looked at like we are lepers. We're wanting something outside and want to find some kind of officiant that will perform a secular ceremony. And we don't want a preacher that will judgmentally perform the wedding "out of the goodness of his god-fearing heart."

So, do any of you have experience with setting up a secular ceremony? I need some advice/instructions. I have had zero success so far. It seems it's harder to get married as an atheist here than it is to for a gay couple to get married.

The Unitarian Church is pretty close to atheist/agnostic....could be one close?
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08-06-2015, 04:40 PM
RE: Secular Wedding
(08-06-2015 04:31 PM)jaguar3030 Wrote:  Me and the fiance are getting married next year--if we can iron out the details. The biggest detail being that we want a completely secular wedding, and living in Kansas, when we say that we are looked at like we are lepers. We're wanting something outside and want to find some kind of officiant that will perform a secular ceremony. And we don't want a preacher that will judgmentally perform the wedding "out of the goodness of his god-fearing heart."

So, do any of you have experience with setting up a secular ceremony? I need some advice/instructions. I have had zero success so far. It seems it's harder to get married as an atheist here than it is to for a gay couple to get married.

I performed a couple of weddings in SC. I was able to as a notary public in that state, here I would need an extra something or other.

I found some really nice vows online that were totally secular and was told it was a wonderful wedding ceremony. It was outside in a friend's yard with just extended family around. Do some Google searches, there are some really good ones out there. And check to see if a notary can legalize the paperwork in your state.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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08-06-2015, 05:45 PM
Secular Wedding
Here's a link to find Humanist Officiants/Celebrants in an area near you.

http://humanist-society.org/humanist-cel...e-listing/
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08-06-2015, 07:02 PM
Secular Wedding
I performed one without any reference to religion. The bride's mother is Catholic, but I don't think the couple (in their 20s) are particularly religious. You can write your own if need be.
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08-06-2015, 07:05 PM
RE: Secular Wedding
How about a Dudeist wedding?
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08-06-2015, 07:13 PM
RE: Secular Wedding
(08-06-2015 07:05 PM)pablo Wrote:  How about a Dudeist wedding?
Someone just posted a Dudeist wedding ceremony script on that forum. Smile
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08-06-2015, 08:43 PM
RE: Secular Wedding
From what I have found, you have to be ordained, and registered as ordained or be a judge. So the trick is finding someone in this area that meets one of those qualifications. Frustrating.
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12-06-2015, 02:07 AM
RE: Secular Wedding
I probably obviously have no idea how wedding paperwork works.... Why can't you get married officially in city hall/by a municipal judge and have the ceremony without a minister present?
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12-06-2015, 04:37 AM
RE: Secular Wedding
(12-06-2015 02:07 AM)Philanthropic Misanthrope Wrote:  I probably obviously have no idea how wedding paperwork works.... Why can't you get married officially in city hall/by a municipal judge and have the ceremony without a minister present?

You can. It depends on the state, but there's always a way for some sort of government official to do it. For instance, in some states, retired judges and tribal leaders can.
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