Share your de-conversion story
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25-04-2014, 12:14 PM
Christian to Buddhist
I guess not much to say other that I studied the bible, hated what it had to say, realized that upon historically searching for a jesus, i found none ever existed.

I started studying buddhism. Never looked back, been Buddhist ever since.

I am still an atheist
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27-04-2014, 10:11 PM
RE: Share your de-conversion story
(02-01-2014 09:28 AM)Skeptic Gamer Wrote:  
(16-12-2013 04:49 PM)goodwithoutgod Wrote:  I used to be a believer, grew up the son of a minister, I was surrounded in its glory, saw the ins and outs...as a young married man both of my daughters were diagnosed with infantile tay sachs disease, a horrible terminal disease with no cure...slow death came to them, my family surrounded us, we prayed, we rocked, I cried, I dont think there is a human on earth that prayed harder than I during that year of sorrow..I beseeched heaven and earth to take me instead....guess what happened? they died in my arms three months apart...this was 1998.

My wife committed suicide 2 months later..couldnt take the pain. I wanted to die, but unfortunately it appears I am extremely mentally resilient..never saw a shrink, never popped a pill, I cried, I moved on, one foot in front of the other. Now I know you are thinking Ah, that is why he hates god, no, I started researching, thinking, asking questions, starting with the obvious why...the ministers and leaders told me things like "we dont know god's plan", "It is not of us to question god", "god allowed this to happen to bring you closer to him" etc etc..

i remember one night we had the church to ourselves, they opened it up, and a dozen preachers were there, we anointed the girls, prayed, and then the senior guy put his hands on my children and prayed, and shook and then looked at me and said, the power of jesus christ has healed them...you have only to turn your life to jesus, and believe and they are healed....yeah, no...they died. What kind of sick man tells a grieving heart broken couple that?

Anyway, I went on my trail of why...why did this happen, why would a god allow this to happen, then that started other questions...why was the 14 million jews allowed to be mass murdered...why this and that...what is this religion, what is it based on, I read the bible cover to cover, I started comparing it, learning the back stories.....needless to say, the more I learned, the less I believed...all total nonsense. I expanded my search to other religions, the more I looked and read and investigated, the more ridiculous the story was....i didnt "turn from god" because my family died, but that experience gave me the drive to think, to learn, to read, to research, to discover that it is a clever, subjugative corrosive made up thing that the majority of the human race has embraced.

I don't know if I can actually click that "like" button for your post, because it's downright heartbreaking. I can't imagine having to go through all of that, and could not possibly relate to it. You have some admirable resiliency.

I workout hard like a mad man 6 days a week...cheap therapy, I am also very communicative, I heal by talking I suppose.

"Belief is so often the death of reason" - Qyburn, Game of Thrones

"The Christian community continues to exist because the conclusions of the critical study of the Bible are largely withheld from them." -Hans Conzelmann (1915-1989)
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27-05-2014, 06:55 PM
RE: Share your de-conversion story
De-conversion, in my mind I find it a funny word.

I was never converted in the first place. My mother was raised catholic, but when God took her first son at 10 months old through sickness she was much to angry with him to really sell me on the idea when I was growing up. The only other people who could have "indoctrinated" me into religion was my father's side of the family and my mother couldn't stand them much. I always had the idea that their views were 'stupid'. Both of my parents were too busy to be concerned over my spiritual welfare (they both concentrated on making sure I had enough food, and a place to sleep... they were such great parents) so it was up to me to decide if god was real.

I was too caught up in my imaginary wars between GI Joe and Cobra to really give a shit.

When I grew up and became a semi-adult, I ignored religion much like politics or society in general because I was too busy saving Vvardenfell from the blight. Yeah, those pesky alter-realities were way more interesting then the real one and I just locked myself away in my tiny apartment and plugged my ears and eyes closed until I met Melissa.

Shocked I came to religion because of a cute girl? Tell me I'm not the only one!

She was Religious ('an-noted with jewels'... blah blah, now that I think back on it, she was REALLY full of herself) with a capital 'R' and her family were 'self-proclaimed' prophets. When my interest in "deflowering" (or defiling, that might be a better word) Melissa became apparent, this lead to an opening to shackle my unprepared mind into the binds of their pentecostal faith. I sadly admit, I bought it hook, line and thousand pound sinker.

It didn't last long. See I couldn't hide the fact that I couldn't buy their faith (speaking in tongues was the most ridiculous thing I ever witnessed, those fools actually believe they are inspired? hahahaa). Melissa couldn't hide the fact she was into physically built black dudes with dreads while I was a pudgy bald white guy. So my inspiration for praising Jebus... I mean Jepus... I mean... you know what I mean was dying quickly. There wasn't another cute girl to keep my interest.

It however didn't stop me from getting baptized.

Those guys... always selling the idea that my life will be greatly changed once the pastor dunks me in the holy waters of the frigid Chesapeake bay in February. I held my skepticism until the day he nearly drowned me in that salty water and when I emerged I fully expected to be wet, out of breath and cold. To my amusement, I was all of those and... pissed, because I went home, changed clothes, ate some soup and went back to saving Vvardenfell from the blight. My life didn't change one iota.

So much for that holy spirit thing... I knew that was crap.

Another ten years went by and I saved Cyrodiil from Oblivion, visited the Capital Wasteland, defeated the reapers three times and I believe I killed some arch-demon in a place called Denerim and was happy in my useless isolated existence. I started and quit college, was diagnosed bipolar and tried to commit suicide twice. I was a charming fellow to be around. One day, I managed to find a good job, become settled without the use of mind altering drugs (praise behavior therapy!) then bought a house.

That led to me becoming familiar with local politics. A few months later I had to navigate the troublesome waters of Obamacare which in turn opened my eyes to the crazy ways those religious nuts were trying to overtake our government (I was helping one of my nephews study for a test which was TEACHING INTELLIGENT DESIGN AS SCIENCE) and I thought... damn, now I have to study religion too? Being a full adult fucking sucks. Although I do have a killer house painted red and black to show for my trouble, and rocking out to loud music and not bothering a soul is SOOOOO worth the effort.

Now I am learning to activate my atheism so I can make the world a better place for me and my loved ones. I don't know shit about religion (listening to Seth's podcasts are helping in that regard) but I know it's shit and I just wanted to touch base with the fine people here and share my story. I'm happy I ran into this forum!

Take care,

Ron
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29-05-2014, 01:11 PM
RE: Share your de-conversion story
Spend my entire highschool in a fundamentalist Catholic school. Where everything have rules in it, including how long should your fingernails is and what color of socks to wear.

The policies are not logical, that highschool made me who I am today - an atheist.
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04-06-2014, 04:57 PM
RE: Share your de-conversion story
Nothing too traumatic, but I feel its worth sharing. I went to a small catholic school growing up. I was the weird, quiet kid who got picked on a lot. Involvement with church stuff was a way to get away from the bullying. I hadn't really thought about god, but took it as it was told to me by the teachers and adults in church.

Two things happened at the age of 12 to put an end to all that:
1. I read the Bible. It took a while and I kept hoping to get the "good word" out of it, but the more I read the more it sounded insane to me.
2. I discovered Magic: the Gathering and a social group with interests much more akin to mine (games, sci-fi and the like).

So, with an understanding that the Bible was a poorly written book about an insane super-powerful bully and a new social group, I settled into private disbelief. I didn't call myself an Atheist for another fourteen years. However, with more religious insanity in the news and encounters in my personal life, I decided that I needed to be public about it.

My experience with meeting fellow gamers made me realize in hindsight that my interest in religion was purely social. I really think this is the primary means of control that religion exerts over people. People will rationalize all sorts of things to keep the peace in their lives. However, I'm glad that I discovered there were other vectors of socialization when I did. I think that being out as an Atheist and having communities of nonbelievers is important for people who may want out but are worried about the social consequences.
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11-06-2014, 05:56 PM
RE: Share your de-conversion story
You know what's funny, I love science and I learned a lot from Professor Lawrence Krauss, Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, Michio Kaku (should be a red flag, he is full of it), and Sam Harris. It drove me nuts that so many people believed in "nonsense". Part of doing science is examining evidence, and you let the evidence show you the way things are, you don't use it to fit what you believe. Unfortunately, I have discovered a profound amount of fraud in science. Learn about the Jesuit order, because we are being lied to every single day of our lives. People need to stop watching television as well. The U.S. government is completely corrupt, and even being destroyed. Americans WILL be disarmed in the future.

We are being lied to about nuclear weapons, they do not exist. The space programs of the world powers, are all fraud. NASA lies to the American people and the world, it's what they do and what they are for. Currently I'm investigating whether or not dinosaurs existed, and I'm afraid they might have not. It might be more fraud and lies, but a lot of research needs to be spent on uncovering this one. I hope people learn to look at evidence. You have to do this in order to know what's false. The internet is full of garbage. Lizard people, aliens in our solar system, and shills like Alex Jones and Christopher Greene that you should never watch. Please people, research the Jesuit order. They have killed at least two popes before, and now are destroying our freedoms, and our futures.
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11-06-2014, 06:12 PM
Share your de-conversion story
[Image: barynyba.jpg]

β€œIt is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. Insensibly one begins to twist facts to suit theories, instead of theories to suit facts.”
― Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, Sherlock Holmes
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17-06-2014, 02:54 PM
RE: Share your de-conversion story
(11-06-2014 05:56 PM)johnreynaga Wrote:  You know what's funny, I love science and I learned a lot from Professor Lawrence Krauss, Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, Michio Kaku (should be a red flag, he is full of it), and Sam Harris. It drove me nuts that so many people believed in "nonsense". Part of doing science is examining evidence, and you let the evidence show you the way things are, you don't use it to fit what you believe. Unfortunately, I have discovered a profound amount of fraud in science. Learn about the Jesuit order, because we are being lied to every single day of our lives. People need to stop watching television as well. The U.S. government is completely corrupt, and even being destroyed. Americans WILL be disarmed in the future.

We are being lied to about nuclear weapons, they do not exist. The space programs of the world powers, are all fraud. NASA lies to the American people and the world, it's what they do and what they are for. Currently I'm investigating whether or not dinosaurs existed, and I'm afraid they might have not. It might be more fraud and lies, but a lot of research needs to be spent on uncovering this one. I hope people learn to look at evidence. You have to do this in order to know what's false. The internet is full of garbage. Lizard people, aliens in our solar system, and shills like Alex Jones and Christopher Greene that you should never watch. Please people, research the Jesuit order. They have killed at least two popes before, and now are destroying our freedoms, and our futures.


Lovely except for the part where it's actually implied that you actually believe this stuff. Hobo

In any case, I think it should be split from here as off-topic anyways.
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17-06-2014, 03:38 PM
RE: Share your de-conversion story
(11-06-2014 05:56 PM)johnreynaga Wrote:  You know what's funny, I love science and I learned a lot from Professor Lawrence Krauss, Richard Dawkins, Christopher Hitchens, Michio Kaku (should be a red flag, he is full of it), and Sam Harris. It drove me nuts that so many people believed in "nonsense". Part of doing science is examining evidence, and you let the evidence show you the way things are, you don't use it to fit what you believe. Unfortunately, I have discovered a profound amount of fraud in science. Learn about the Jesuit order, because we are being lied to every single day of our lives. People need to stop watching television as well. The U.S. government is completely corrupt, and even being destroyed. Americans WILL be disarmed in the future.

We are being lied to about nuclear weapons, they do not exist. The space programs of the world powers, are all fraud. NASA lies to the American people and the world, it's what they do and what they are for. Currently I'm investigating whether or not dinosaurs existed, and I'm afraid they might have not. It might be more fraud and lies, but a lot of research needs to be spent on uncovering this one. I hope people learn to look at evidence. You have to do this in order to know what's false. The internet is full of garbage. Lizard people, aliens in our solar system, and shills like Alex Jones and Christopher Greene that you should never watch. Please people, research the Jesuit order. They have killed at least two popes before, and now are destroying our freedoms, and our futures.

oh...my....goodness. Well I can say from personal/professional experience that nukes do exist. I have guarded them for years. Yes, contrary t o your favorite conspiracy website, we DID land on the moon, yes dinosaurs existed, we didn't run around and create bone shaped fossil rocks and bury them worldwide just to stump the creationists.......may I recommend you seek some professional help. I am not being sarcastic or mean spirited, I am serious, you may have an imbalance. If you visit too many BS conspiracy websites or watch too much late night tv you begin to lose sight of reality.

"Belief is so often the death of reason" - Qyburn, Game of Thrones

"The Christian community continues to exist because the conclusions of the critical study of the Bible are largely withheld from them." -Hans Conzelmann (1915-1989)
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21-06-2014, 02:45 AM
Information RE: Share your de-conversion story
well... it all started when I was 12 and I was too much ignorant about my position on god and it's validity

every Monday we had theology class(including Quranic history and sharia laws) fallowed by a reading of an individual and then 10 minutes for questions and answers. I was too tried from last night cause we had just moved and there was a lot of cleaning and organizing to do (what made me question my position happened the night before) , as I was moving my desk in my room my brother came to me and said : didn't I tell you to buy a much lighter desk ? I turned to hum and said but this one was more suitable for my use , he then said " what is the point of me telling you if the outcome is the same and already decided" so, as I was holding my backpack in my folded arms : I raised my hand and asked my teacher : "what is the point of this life if the outcome is already decided for us? (weird silence in class) I mean shouldn't we be able to change our path? if he already knows where I would end up then this is just cruelly pointless... uuhmm isn't it ?" the answer was really flawed,naive and kinda faaaaaaaaar too much included guesses and presumptions. as the class turned to the teacher he then told me that Allah knows the past, present future and the beyond cause he is out of time and his knowing the past is horizontal will your freewill is vertical ( I know what you think ... well I guess) so your free to do what you pleases you but the best way is to surrender yourself and (there's a myth in my country saying) if you try to think about the god's characteristics you'll gone insane (later I found out it was because of Nietzsche's death) . I don't know why but this answer was like me telling my brother you don't know past,present future and the beyond so why should I listen to you (the same with my teacher)? school was over and on the way home I couldn't stop thinking about this i remember thinking with my self that how does he know that? why is that he down't go insane over thinking about that himself?! what source is there that I don't have?! and well I did what every sane (stupid) person would do, confirmation bias - maybe he is very faithful and is blessed with god's gift ... he knows Koran and the Hadith best I guess ( what else could I do?)
when I got home I changed ,while I was having lunch and I did whatever any sane(stupid) person would do, I asked my parent the same question and the same nonsense was offered again with a little hint of the sinister felling of us being the chosen one and lucky enough with the best religion ... so I tried to argue at the table; but he already knows the outcome I mean... what about martyrdom... because .. because if he knows the out come then there is no martyr and/or martyrdom is it? the whole life is pointless for us then ... they then tried to convince me with Hadith and verses of Koran and in the end they also ended up the same with the most famous brilliant (stupidly cowardice) sentence "just .. just forget it this questions will be answered if you have faith and surrender yourself. Huh

surrender yourself , have faith , it'll all workout in the end , don't let the Satan deceive you ... these were the kinds of answers I got so I went to my room sit on the chair beside my not so much light weighted desk and started writing them down with a number in front of each that showed how many times I heard them and by the end of another week (2 week as the ongoing week) I ended up with something like 200 and 150 of each the winner of course was the surrender yourself with even more than 300 times which was what made me tired of keeping a record. meaningless, pathetic, presumptuous and most of all ambiguous . after ignoring them for another week (which I shouldn't have Angry ) I got a new answer read the Koran all you need is in there ( and when they say all they mean all really), I picked up the book and started reading after making Wudu which is really Voodoo by the way and of course I made notes as I was reading and then asked my teacher that Koran says this (liked killing heretics and that... ) why does it say so? and then it got worse so much worse . what he said next outnumbered that surrender yourself thing which was exactly this " who can understand Koran really to it's fullest... you know Rad ( which is now what my friends call me and means the heretic) These verses has too many layers of meanings, so many vast interpretations and we can only come to a limit understanding of it but if you insist then look for Asbab al-nuzul (meaning occasions or circumstances of revelation ,and for your determined birth location sake our language is Persian why is even prayer and Koran not allowed to be in another language) anyhow, I read that and well this is where I became convinced that this is all made up and of course way to much dangerous because of it's dubious text, that's why everyone has a meaning for a verse , that is why the the void of religion will be filled with corruption and stupidity people who want to take advantage of this and after all why didn't I go insane? Tongue

At this point I was in the middle of my way to learn English which turned my whole life over and later became a chance for me to encounter with Hume,Saul Kripke, and finally the dialectics. so I used what little knowledge of English I had and searched over the internet for words like freewill, god existence and most of all Determinism. it was so hard to read too many words to look up for in dictionary , way too many technical words ( by the way I was completely unaware of Atheism Weeping or Even Agnosticism Sadcryface ) so I was going to give up as it was really hard to fallow and ... and no one was independent in their thinking so there was absolutely no one to ask help from. 4 months was passed from my first year in junior high and well I was a bookworm never got a grade less than 20 or in words you get use to, A but it changed when I came to know determinism and more specifically compatibilism , all these questions aside ; what about god? is he a she? does it exist? and where to look for this? , I had to read philosophy so where to begin, who should I start with and what books? for none of this I could rely on our philosophy books (except Bashiriye.h or Zibakala.m) because here not only they like pseudo-science they like to add something to philosophy called Hekmah which is basically a big biiiig load of physical assumptions (in spite of their contradiction to physics) and more Assumptions of metaphysics . So went to a book store and searched for book and it... was.. HARD to find something good because they we're mixed with Hekmah so I didn't buy anything from the "philosophy" shelf of course, and went on to literature part picked up a book called " The stranger Albert Camus " it was the first book I read 5 times and after that I read about Existentialism , Sartre and well the great moment that every sane person(stupid) person goes to The panic Hobo Unsure No Gasp So we finally met , Atheism ( then what the hell I was doing, what should I do? , what about life? should I talk to anyone about this? )
which in the process of it I went thtough three phases

1. Sadegh Hedayat ,Ahmad Shamloo and Omar Khayyam (Persian critics)

During my second year in junior high my grade began to fall gradually as my main focus wan't school or any other extra activity, I became interested in literature and Started reading every book that i could get my hands on it Religious, Fiction, non-fiction even banned books like The the satanic verses or Voltaire books . so My attitude changed very fast in a short time and the outcome was a very big void between me and my friends,family and mostly anyone on my age . I became more skeptic yet more alone in library , more polemic yet had to remain silent mostly cause it feels good to have a head on you shoulders ... you know. at this point I abandoned my religious belief , I never prayed anymore, never attended Mosque , Religious gatherings, fasting in Ramadan but I was still in fear of being wrong ,Blasphemy or that I shouldn't offend their naive views

2- English , Hume, the Socratic method,Charles Bradlaugh and the dialectics

After I was nearly in the end of my first period of my path in learning English I began to read books in English downloading them from the internet using torrent and different blogs , I read All that was written by Darwin which was obviously mean that there was no first man and any creation ,Thomas Huxley, which helped me with my misunderstandings of Evolution , Hume who finally brought me to my senses . after this time which lasted for another two month I wan't in fear anymore I would question bluntly and demand answers , I wasn't afraid of offending any believe , and I started ghost writing a summery of what I had realized .

3-The bible

In my search within all these subjects a friend of mine who was my classmate in English class and was suspected about my out-grew of faith told me that I have to read this book cause ....ready?.. "It was the word of god" and well at first I didn't read it completely most of the times I just checked the verses that was referenced in books I came about but as I read more I figured out as the atheists say (Christians are the only atheists I know because they don't believe in all Greek gods) it was the word of the only god and well ... after I read it both in Persian and English for about 3 times in each language I was Convinced that this is a lie and I had to out grew this absurdity. I haven't seen any book more powerful than the bible for disillusioning of this Delusion.

At this point I was a convinced atheist ( I object to that word) but later on in a discussion with my uncle , he asked me why didn't I pray anymore or didn't do my praying for times a day ? well I answered why should I? and he said because if you don't you've sinned so I told him how does he know? is he god? who do you know his mind? I smiled and said or maybe her mind? he then sat beside me and started saying the same words I heard once an somehow we ended up with this talk:

- Rad( I didn't mention my own name here) do you believe in god?
- it's not a matter of believe.. it's.. hen then jumped in and said
- then what is it ...tell me ...tell me [he was ,is and will be very religious)
- well uncle it's a matter of existence if it exist then me believing it or not doesn't change anything, does it?
- so... so do you think god exist?
- With the probability of us having a global country with a dog being it's leader
- so .. no then? yeah?
- I never said no I said with the probability of ...
[he then furiously looked at me]
- rad, this is absurd ,surly you know that
- yeah this is absurd anything with this probability is absurd
- well your being judgmental
- really? you haven't asked me a single question of what I came to know or understand about this potion and somehow I'm the one being judgmental? ..really?
-but Koran says : "things...things and many other things "
- so?
- SO?.....SO? this is the word of god
- No the book of Mormons is the word of god?
-what ? morm.. what?
- they are religious and they have a book too
- but ours is the last one and our prophet the last one?
- I have evidence that begs to differ , Mormonism is the last and then I explained to him what it is
- this is not true and you know it
- congrats now you know where do I stand on this subject
he then went on to continue wit his prayer and after a year in my birthday I told him that I'm an atheist (however after I read Plantinga and Craig I became an Igtheist) now my family almost knows but they made me promise not to tell anyone about this and not to get them and myself in trouble ( good thing my own family is not really dogmatic Smile however some of them are very religious Facepalm )

It as a really perfect journey but the loss of the time I wasted believing this nonsense never leaves me alone . what a great deal of pleasure could I have and it's all gone I feel like I need a big win bigger than anything else I had done ever to get over this obligated lost .. so now I formed a little group with others like me here no a lot of course, we discuss different subjects and comment on them but it's very lonely and hard to keep silent ... you finally have an open mind and your obligated to have a closed mouth. I have to pretend all the time , it kills me inside when I hear some of my family members talking so much proudly about stoning to death or honor killings .

I'll break out of this hell-hole one day,after all we are the survival of hope and we've managed to keep it's light alive after centuries of being killed,bullied ,Isolated and burnt. as my favorite singer Shahin Najafi says : "I loose but no one else is gonna win except us ." ***






"Dare to think!"
-Kant
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