Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
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15-06-2012, 10:00 PM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
Let me add...don't do more to hurt the kids, they have enough to deal with.

I'm not anti-social. I'm pro-solitude.
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15-06-2012, 11:25 PM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
Yep, just walk away.

I'm not sure I understand why you would get mixed up with a married, cheating woman anyway. Those types are always trouble with a capital T.

I'm sure she'll get 'hers' in the long run Yes

Humankind Dodgy (a total misnomer)
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15-06-2012, 11:33 PM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
I have been the guy who unknowingly was "the guy she was cheating on him with".... and when I found out, I was so mad. But if I put myself in the shoes of the guy the gal was in the relationship with, I can only imagine how furious he was at me. Surely he wanted to blame me and I was the asshole. He was mad at me and he did find out. I had no idea the gal was in a relationship.

The shitty person was not him, nor me, we were both completely oblivious. The shitty person was HER for putting both people in the situation and being a fucked up and stupid person who couldn't respect the feelings of others.

I have also been through a divorce and also been in the situation of being best friends with the person your wife is cheating on you with. The difference is that the guy MEANT TO and KNEW I was married.

Let me put it this way....

I had the chance to make both of their lives hell and I chose not to. The guilt she ended up dealing with was enough. Do you really want to piss her off? Make her life hell? Cut off all ties with her and pretend she doesn't exist. If you feel like making shit bad for her it is because you feel an emotional tie with her and you are upset and she has caused you feelings of grief, guilt, betrayal or otherwise. The sooner you get over it and move on with your life, the sooner you leave the baggage behind and the feelings behind and can devote yourself to someone who DESERVES your respect and time of day.

I cut off all ties with my ex wife. I made it the most civil divorce I could possibly make. I signed the papers, acted cool joe and pretended like I was the happiest guy on the planet. 2 weeks after the divorce papers were signed it was a constant, "I want you back, I miss you, I'm so sorry, let's get back together." I didn't respond to her. She was dead to me. To this day I haven't responded to a single text, email or call and have not heard from her in ages. I'm sure that it probably kills her inside to know that she fucked things up. Maybe it doesn't and maybe she doesn't even care now. Fact is.... I don't care, because I chose to put it behind me, I chose to not make it my life's goal to try and "get back at her" because it would only create MORE emotional attachment.

Get rid of the emotional attachment and baggage so you aren't carrying it with you into the next relationship. Learn from whatever lessons you can learn and find someone who is an awesome person and move on. Life is too short. Things will eventually catch up to her and her family, these are conscious decisions she has made and she has to live with them.
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15-06-2012, 11:50 PM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
Yep. Walk. Block all phone calls, messages, texts. Block emails, facebook, all social media.
Cutting off any and all contact will give you the satisfaction that you've done something that she can't fuck up.


You'll probably find very quickly ... that it's the best thing that could have happened.

You will be much better off.


Now, go off and give yourself time to wallow in self pity - not a lot of time, but time. If you are able, take a little weekend trip... get away from everything especially anywhere you might run into her. When you've rested and get back, things will look different... you'll have a clearer perspective. You'll be able to start fresh. Thumbsup

*********** You survived. *************

Lesson learned: married person + single person = two stupid people.

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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16-06-2012, 12:02 AM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
(15-06-2012 11:33 PM)Logisch Wrote:  Get rid of the emotional attachment and baggage so you aren't carrying it with you into the next relationship. Learn from whatever lessons you can learn and find someone who is an awesome person and move on. Life is too short. Things will eventually catch up to her and her family, these are conscious decisions she has made and she has to live with them.
Amen brother! Thumbsup

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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16-06-2012, 12:02 AM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
(15-06-2012 11:50 PM)kim Wrote:  Lesson learned: married person + single person = two stupid people.
And sometimes 3.

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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16-06-2012, 12:05 AM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
(16-06-2012 12:02 AM)Erxomai Wrote:  
(15-06-2012 11:50 PM)kim Wrote:  Lesson learned: married person + single person = two stupid people.
And sometimes 3.

You got a point. Undecided

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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16-06-2012, 12:07 AM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
(16-06-2012 12:05 AM)kim Wrote:  
(16-06-2012 12:02 AM)Erxomai Wrote:  And sometimes 3.

You got a point. Undecided
That's what she said. Drinking Beverage

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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16-06-2012, 12:11 AM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
Also... if you want to really learn from this... understand that how you feel is how it feels to be "that person." so promise yourself NOT TO DO THAT to anyone else. I promised myself I would never do that to another person because of how it felt to be cheated on. I have always kept that promise and have never broken it. It is one of the strongest things I stand by. Trust in a relationship is KEY.

You are BETTER than that, you are BETTER than her. Move on, be happy and BE a better person Smile

Life goes on.
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16-06-2012, 12:19 AM
RE: Should I Make My Ex's Life Miserable?
(16-06-2012 12:07 AM)Erxomai Wrote:  
(16-06-2012 12:05 AM)kim Wrote:  You got a point. Undecided
That's what she said. Drinking Beverage
Dude, from now on I expect you to put a question mark behind that.

Also....penalty hoot.

So many cats, so few good recipes.
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