Skunks on Noah's Ark.
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22-10-2015, 04:19 AM
Skunks on Noah's Ark.
I just thought about this one. It was almost like an Epiphany really. I mean...WHOA!

How did they keep the skunks from...like..I don't even..

Forget about the smell of poop! The instant a one of those lions makes a peep or one of noah's family members walks up to the skunks a little too fast and scares them.

OMG!!!!!! The other animals would fucking Riot and stampede!


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22-10-2015, 05:18 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
Not a problem, since it's impossible to build a 300 cubit seaworthy boat from wood, it would have sunk in a few minutes.

Though Noah and animals would have suffocated from an atmosphere super-saturated from humidity due to the massive amount of water about to fall on the ground before he even got the animals on board.

That's ok, I'm sure God could have just re-created everything, even Noah afterwards.

Gods derive their power from post-hoc rationalizations. -The Inquisition

Using the supernatural to explain events in your life is a failure of the intellect to comprehend the world around you. -The Inquisition
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22-10-2015, 05:26 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
Even less of a problem, seeing there wouldn't be any air.

The math is pretty straightforward -- if you use the dimensions given, and discount any interior structure (giving the theist a generous advantage) -- two of every animal would not fit inside --- even if you ran them through a wood chipper and made juice out of them first.

...

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22-10-2015, 05:40 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
(22-10-2015 05:26 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  Even less of a problem, seeing there wouldn't be any air.

The math is pretty straightforward -- if you use the dimensions given, and discount any interior structure (giving the theist a generous advantage) -- two of every animal would not fit inside --- even if you ran them through a wood chipper and made juice out of them first.

...

You mean before the hydraulic pressure from the force of 363 inches of rainfall per hour (roughly 150 times more than the hardest rainfall ever recorded in a sustained storm, in SuperTyphoon Haiyan) melted that boat like cotton candy under a firehose?

Talk about straightforward math: 40 days/nights = 960 hrs of rainfall. Height of Everest = 29,029'. Divide and get 363"/hr of rainfall for the full 40.

"Theology made no provision for evolution. The biblical authors had missed the most important revelation of all! Could it be that they were not really privy to the thoughts of God?" - E. O. Wilson
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22-10-2015, 05:44 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
(22-10-2015 05:40 AM)RocketSurgeon76 Wrote:  
(22-10-2015 05:26 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  Even less of a problem, seeing there wouldn't be any air.

The math is pretty straightforward -- if you use the dimensions given, and discount any interior structure (giving the theist a generous advantage) -- two of every animal would not fit inside --- even if you ran them through a wood chipper and made juice out of them first.

...

You mean before the hydraulic pressure from the force of 363 inches of rainfall per hour (roughly 150 times more than the hardest rainfall ever recorded in a sustained storm, in SuperTyphoon Haiyan) melted that boat like cotton candy under a firehose?

Talk about straightforward math: 40 days/nights = 960 hrs of rainfall. Height of Everest = 29,029'. Divide and get 363"/hr of rainfall for the full 40.

Yeah -- if the goatherders who wrote the Noah story had a decent pocket calculator they'd have changed the figures just a bit.

As it was -- they came up with some spooky sounding shit that was beyond the capability of the average schmuck to debunk, sitting around the campfire..

.......................................

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22-10-2015, 05:54 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
(22-10-2015 05:40 AM)RocketSurgeon76 Wrote:  
(22-10-2015 05:26 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  Even less of a problem, seeing there wouldn't be any air.

The math is pretty straightforward -- if you use the dimensions given, and discount any interior structure (giving the theist a generous advantage) -- two of every animal would not fit inside --- even if you ran them through a wood chipper and made juice out of them first.

...

You mean before the hydraulic pressure from the force of 363 inches of rainfall per hour (roughly 150 times more than the hardest rainfall ever recorded in a sustained storm, in SuperTyphoon Haiyan) melted that boat like cotton candy under a firehose?

Talk about straightforward math: 40 days/nights = 960 hrs of rainfall. Height of Everest = 29,029'. Divide and get 363"/hr of rainfall for the full 40.

I ran into an article that calculated the thermal energy from a rainfall that intense would have boiled the oceans, I can't seem to find it right now.

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22-10-2015, 06:13 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
(22-10-2015 05:54 AM)TheInquisition Wrote:  
(22-10-2015 05:40 AM)RocketSurgeon76 Wrote:  You mean before the hydraulic pressure from the force of 363 inches of rainfall per hour (roughly 150 times more than the hardest rainfall ever recorded in a sustained storm, in SuperTyphoon Haiyan) melted that boat like cotton candy under a firehose?

Talk about straightforward math: 40 days/nights = 960 hrs of rainfall. Height of Everest = 29,029'. Divide and get 363"/hr of rainfall for the full 40.

I ran into an article that calculated the thermal energy from a rainfall that intense would have boiled the oceans, I can't seem to find it right now.

The easy theist response is that the story also says that the "fountains of the deep" opened up so not all the water came as rain. Some came up from underground.

It's ridiculous, but it does make any claims about the effects of the rain impossible to support because there is no indication of how much supposedly fell as rain.

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22-10-2015, 06:49 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
The methane saturation on an airtight vessel would have killed everything before it exploded.

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22-10-2015, 06:52 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
(22-10-2015 05:26 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  even if you ran them through a wood chipper and made juice out of them first.


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22-10-2015, 06:53 AM
RE: Skunks on Noah's Ark.
(22-10-2015 06:49 AM)Old Man Marsh Wrote:  The methane saturation on an airtight vessel would have killed everything before it exploded.
It couldn't explode.

There wouldn't be room for oxygen.

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