So I am transitioning
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21-01-2018, 03:17 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
(21-01-2018 02:12 PM)Leerob Wrote:  kim: thank you. I hope these things work for a naturally female body. I used to have high testosterone levels a few years back when I was very active and had a lot of muscle. So that was raising the levels naturally.

skyking: Yea I heard that before. I want to lose weight very much but even though I know A LOT about weight lost and healthy eating, it just isn't working. I eat good food but I eat too much of it. Right now I am slowly losing because from the anxiety meds I lost my apetite completely. So I never know what to eat, then I am not finishing my meals, and I snack much less. I lost about 2kg so far. If I can keep that up, not the apetite but the way I eat atm, I should be on a good track.

YonadavKenyon: Thank you! It really sounds reassuring. How do you do airports?

That's a rough way to lose weight.
you have enough on your mind, I was making no suggestion other than the tidbit of info. I noticed my T went up considerably with weight loss.
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21-01-2018, 04:51 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
GirlyMan thinks I am an attractive man Heart Get over here, youuuu Heart

skyking: Oh I didn't take it badly. I just answered. we good.


Also I just realized something big... Even though I missed out on a lot, I will have at least about 40 years or so, to be a man Smile I cannot wait for the day I pass in public with a flat chest and a edged face and a hair done at the barber!
I cannot wait for the geek relationship with some RPG or LARP person and some amazing sex with my... willy... Big Grin
I know things suck at times and not everything is wonderful. But just being myself finally, and being recognized correctly, it will be great!

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23-01-2018, 11:55 AM
RE: So I am transitioning
(07-01-2018 01:59 PM)Leerob Wrote:  Alright, new video is out.
New hair and all.
Sorry for the dumb thumbnail but I was too lazy to make a nice one. I don't have much energy right now.




I'm liking the new haircut Thumbsup Smile
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24-01-2018, 01:49 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Finally heard from the psychiatrist.




Captain Underpants
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24-01-2018, 02:53 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
(21-01-2018 04:51 PM)Leerob Wrote:  GirlyMan thinks I am an attractive man Heart Get over here, youuuu Heart

No homo.

#sigh
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24-01-2018, 04:10 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
(24-01-2018 02:53 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(21-01-2018 04:51 PM)Leerob Wrote:  GirlyMan thinks I am an attractive man Heart Get over here, youuuu Heart

No homo.

[Image: dNtSMdX.gif]

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25-01-2018, 04:07 AM
RE: So I am transitioning
Haircut looks pretty cool Rob Smile you actually look a lot like one of my old school friends Laugh out load

I'm training for a 10K run, read about it in my blog :
Lost In Pace - A Running Blog
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06-02-2018, 06:56 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
I notice I have not said anything here.
Had a bit of a rough time.
Got sick, had some job interviews, work super stressful, so didn't have energy in the evening to come on the forum. Just some CS:GO and Youtube really.
Found myself starting with biting my teeth again. It happens when I get into great stress, more than I can handle, in my sleep I will bite my teeth or grind them. Sometimes so hard that it hurts and wakes me up. Haven't reached that point yet but I certainly started mildly.
Also got really sick. For everybody else it would be just a cold, for me it is instant lung issues...

Anyway, before I go to bed, I thought I give a few updates.
So I was at my GP recently (when I got sick) and also asked about my referal letter from September. The one for the psychiatrist so I can start medical transition. Start of January I asked to get a private referal in addition to try and speed things up. So the GP gave me the public psychiatrist's (the one from the September referral) phone number so I could call and ask if there is an update. I then called on Friday and got an appointment right for Monday.
Went there.
That was not a specialized psychiatrist. He told me this and said he is not sure if a letter from him will be enough because of that but he will still do an assessment with me.
So that is what we did.
I am not happy with myself. I mean when it comes to this assessment. There were so many things I wanted to say but didn't know when it would be approrpriate. And while my GP initially asked me specific questions to assess me in this transgender "category" this psychiatrist did not. So that is why I didn't know when I can say the things I wanted to say, therefore didn't say them. But apparently I did say enough thought the conversation. In the end he said he was satisfied and thinks I am transgender (no shit sherlock) and gave me the diagnosis that I need "gender dysphoria".
He was glad that I have very good friends and work as a support system and encouraged me to keep my friends close. He also said he disagrees with me taking anxiety medication (but quite honestly, he spoke to me for 45 minutes while I have dealth with this for years, so mind me, I will keep taking them for a little while). He said he disagrees with me taking those because he feels that my triggers for the anxiety are valid issues and I should not mask my emotions with those meds. But I have to say, if it were only the few things I told him there, I would agree but reality is, he is not my therapist and I will not see him again anyway. He did say he will leave the medication issue up to my GP as that's who prescribed it to me.

Anyway, I am glad he gave me the diagnosis that I need. He will send a letter to my GP and a letter to the endocrinology. He did warn me that it might take a while though. So I guess I will check with my GP in a few weeks to see if my letter has arrived by then.
I would like a copy and also a letter of recommendation so I can start speaking to surgeons in order to get my top surgery done.

We'll see I guess.

Right now I just feel anxious that maybe the endo won't accept the letter from the psychiatrist because he is not specialized.... Dunno. Kinda makes me anxious...

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10-02-2018, 02:37 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Just too much dysphoria right now...
I don't want to deal with chesticles and ladyparts and waiting times. I feel like a fake walking around the way I do.
I have been living male full time since last year September. One of the lucky people I am in that my work, friends, and family are all supportive and respectful. But it doesn't change the fact that right now, people referring to me with "he/him" do that as an act of kindness rather than anything. I am not passing - not by a long shot. I can't bind as much as I want to for health reasons and that is getting to me. I hate my voice, my chest, my face, and "down there".
It has become so bad that my body hygiene is suffering at this point. I don't have the energy to do anything because all my energy goes into not going insane...

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15-02-2018, 06:36 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Thought I'd share a vlog this time. A bit about the psychiatrist appointment I had.




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