So I am transitioning
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28-07-2017, 01:52 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Sending you some more hugs and support.

"If you don't have a seat at the table, you're probably on the menu."

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28-07-2017, 01:55 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
(28-07-2017 09:52 AM)Emma Wrote:  
(28-07-2017 09:25 AM)SYZ Wrote:  The following article from MediaMatters.org about the administrator of the above site, Walt Heyer, makes for interesting reading that counters misconceptions of gender change that he claims exist...

—A popular right-wing activist with extreme, discredited views about LGBT people is making the media rounds to talk about Caitlyn Jenner, peddling the myth that many transgender people end up regretting transitioning.

Walt Heyer, contributor for the rabidly anti-LGBT web magazine The Federalist, appeared on the June 2 edition of CNN Newsroom to comment on Vanity Fair's cover story about Caitlyn Jenner's decision to publicly identify as a transgender woman.

Heyer's life story has made him a pseudo-celebrity in anti-LGBT circles; in his forties, he decided to transition to living life as a woman, only to transition back to living as a man less than a decade later. Since then, he's pushed the debunked claim that transgender people often experience regret after transitioning, arguing that what transgender people actually need is "psychiatric or psychological help."

But while he was granted a platform to comment on transgender issues, Heyer's experience isn't reflective of the experiences of the overwhelming majority of transgender people; he even admits that he was "misdiagnosed" and was actually suffering with "a dissociative disorder that required talk therapy, not surgery." His views about transitioning aren't rooted in research or medical expertise. The idea that many transgender people experience "transition regrets" has been widely debunked and contradicts the positions of major professional medical organizations, which all view transitioning as an important and beneficial step for people who identify with a gender identity that doesn't correspond with their biological sex.

When he's not appearing on a major cable news network, Heyer is a source of extreme transphobic commentary. He's called gender reassignment surgery a "modern day frontal lobotomy," asserted that parents who help their children transition should be punished with "at least 20 years in prison."

That kind of extremism has made Heyer a favorite of anti-gay hate groups, including MassResistance and Americans for Truth About Homosexuality, who tout his story as proof that being transgender is a mental problem that can be treated or cured. But it also makes Heyer an odd choice for mainstream media outlets, which should be emphasizing the commentary of experts rather than fringe voices.

Thank you for taking the time SYZ.

Here's more info on Walter from a trans person who researches and investigates issues surrounding gender in our society:
http://genderanalysis.net/2015/07/walt-h...alysis-09/




Most trans people regret not transitioning earlier. When I was researching and getting familiar with this subject the only other regret I could see was that the sugery, if it was undertaken, didn't turn out as well as expected because the surgeon's skills weren't up to par. As I recall the best surgeons for MTF are in South East Asia. But any surgery can be a dissapointment. Some transgender people have to go back to fix things or tweak a surgical problem but it is rare that someone really regrets transitioning. This is what the religious right would love to believe so they can justify their judgemental attitudes and religious crap.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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28-07-2017, 02:04 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
@morondog: I didn't want it to be painful to read. Sorry if it's a bit of a downer. Just wanted to explain why risking regret, which probably won't happen, is more important than not doing it alltogether.

@Mathilda: Big Grin

@ ShadowProject: Thank you

@ dancefortwo: Yea I heard something like that too about surgeries. I hear good things of a Mr Christopher in the UK for bottom surgery. But I am not sure yet IF I want bottom surgery and then if I decide that I do, I am not sure yet which I would prefer. Because there are different ones to choose from. Then again, if I want bottom surgery, I also have to loose about 30 kilo so there is that obstacle to tackle.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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28-07-2017, 02:17 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Also just because I feel a bit like this song and like choir music.





Quote:You with the sad eyes
Don't be discouraged
Oh I realize
Its hard to take courage
...
So don't be afraid to let them show
Your true colors
True colors are beautiful
Like a rainbow

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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28-07-2017, 02:43 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
(28-07-2017 02:04 PM)Leerob Wrote:  @morondog: I didn't want it to be painful to read. Sorry if it's a bit of a downer. Just wanted to explain why risking regret, which probably won't happen, is more important than not doing it alltogether.

Don't apologise. It's welcome from my side - helps me to understand more. It's just... I see you struggling with this and... I think you're kinda amazing.

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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29-07-2017, 01:06 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Simply Nosy Questions (maybe it's time to start getting used to nosy questions, okay?):

Do the physicians involved still require things like
"Living" your life as though you were the gender you are going to become for a year before they will even consider starting surgeries?
A psych evaluation?

These questions are as much directed at the people who would think this a whim or something that will pass. Seriously, as far as my limited understanding goes, the only people who 'get to' transition quickly and without these requirements are celebrities who shall remain unnamed and can afford to pay the big bucks and do it in the public eye, using the publicity along the way to feed their personal need for, well, publicity.

I don't have studies or stats to reference for this, just an honest gut feeling that VERY VERY few people who would go through everything that's really involved in transitioning would wind up regretting it. I'm betting that far more women who have boob jobs or lip jobs or other "cosmetic' related surgeries wind up regretting it than people transitioning from MtF or FtM. It's just not a decision that takes place this week and happens next week.

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Where are we going and why am I in this hand basket?
"Life is not all lovely thorns and singing vultures, you know." ~ Morticia Addams
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29-07-2017, 01:18 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Leerob, I'm sending you this nice little video. Hope you enjoy it. Big Grin




Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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29-07-2017, 02:03 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
(29-07-2017 01:06 PM)outtathereligioncloset Wrote:  Simply Nosy Questions (maybe it's time to start getting used to nosy questions, okay?):

Do the physicians involved still require things like
"Living" your life as though you were the gender you are going to become for a year before they will even consider starting surgeries?
A psych evaluation?

I don't mind questions. It is better to ask than assume things. And I don't mind answering the same question 20 times either. So we good.

Now for the medical stuff.
I have done some research on that for my specific case. I live in Ireland but I am a Germany citizen.

Changing gender marker / name in Ireland:
Irish citizens can simply go to the officials, pay a fee, and get their gender marker changed. That is it for the papers.
Changing gender market / name in Germany:
As German living abroad, there is one specific court where I need to go in person. The court will assign two specialists who get to evaluate me. The court might require more. Then I need to speak to the judge. And then the judge will decide if I am a man or not aka if my name and gender marker will be changed.
I know for Germany that a bill is being proposed to make this process less humiliating. But it might take a while. So I might still have to go through the humiliation.

Medical procedures.
Of course, living in Ireland, I follow the Irish laws.
And I have done some research but I really need to speak to a doctor because I am not clear on how everything works.
As far as I understand, I can get on Testosterone relatively soon. I need to live full time male for at least a year, before we can even think about a bottom surgery. Top surgery can happen during that time already, as well as getting the womb and ovaries out can apparently happen during that time too.
I found that apparently the top surgery I need is not being offered in Ireland for some reason. But I can go to the UK for example.

That is really all I know so far and I might be wrong with half of it. As I said, I need to see the doctor and get some clarifications. I also have to write a lot of emails to get some more information.

@D42: I love the song! Big Grin Thanks

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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29-07-2017, 08:18 PM
RE: So I am transitioning
Apparently changing gender marker is a whole hell of a lot easier in Ireland than in the US. I know someone here whose college-age son became her daughter. Went to hell and back with the process of changing birth certificate and gender ID with their health insurance company. Especially the health insurance company. Funding for transition was all out of pocket. They were just trying to get the insurance company to acknowledge/continue to insure daughter instead of son. The same human being they had been insuring since birth.

Where are we going and why am I in this hand basket?
"Life is not all lovely thorns and singing vultures, you know." ~ Morticia Addams
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30-07-2017, 02:28 AM
RE: So I am transitioning
(29-07-2017 08:18 PM)outtathereligioncloset Wrote:  Apparently changing gender marker is a whole hell of a lot easier in Ireland than in the US. I know someone here whose college-age son became her daughter. Went to hell and back with the process of changing birth certificate and gender ID with their health insurance company. Especially the health insurance company. Funding for transition was all out of pocket. They were just trying to get the insurance company to acknowledge/continue to insure daughter instead of son. The same human being they had been insuring since birth.

Yea I think the paper work is a bit less complicated in Ireland. Sadly my paperwork will mostly happen in Germany. And that will be humiliating as hell. But you gotta do what you gotta do.
What I am a little anxious about is how my treatment will work out. So T shots and Top surgery to begin with. I am not sure how much if any of it can be funded by the NHS and/or my health insurance. but yea, all things to ask the doctor I guess.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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