So tired.
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11-10-2015, 01:49 PM
So tired.
I've had a pretty bad year. I have to get back into doing some workout. Even though I can't feel much different on my mood as I do it. I can sure enough feel it now. I'm so tired all the time and I have been feeling myself slip into a mild depression. Now it has gotten to the point where I just need to cry but I can't.

I talked about it with one of the persons who comes to my flat once a week to chat. They have had lots of different persons to come by and I just can't keep on doing that. I don't feel like I'm moving in any direction. By the I'm not sure I have actually told too much about this on here. But a few-ish years ago I was diagnosed with dysthymia and I am now on disability pension. And trying to get well enough to get rid of that and be able to get and hold a job and be a normal citizen.

Anywho, I talked with this lady about how I feel about it all and that I feel I need some more help as I can't figure out how the fuck to get my brain to understand a few basic facts about life. . . or rather feel them. I live too much on my emotions. I can't arse myself to do stuff that I find boring. And I have a fairly mild social anxiety to boot so that don't help either.

So in short: I'm starting to drown but I have reached out. I think this is just as much to type it out for myself. To admit somethings wrong and I need to fight a bit harder now to keep myself from falling down that hole that scares the living shit out of me. I don't want to take up cutting again. I don't want to get a rope again. That shit is scary and I'm not sure I'll survive a second trip there.
But it's still a fairly long distance away.

I guess that I'm able to see it before it take too much of a hold does say something about how far I have become. So there's that. I guess.
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11-10-2015, 01:58 PM
RE: So tired.
(11-10-2015 01:49 PM)Nishi Karano Kaze Wrote:  I've had a pretty bad year. I have to get back into doing some workout. Even though I can't feel much different on my mood as I do it. I can sure enough feel it now. I'm so tired all the time and I have been feeling myself slip into a mild depression. Now it has gotten to the point where I just need to cry but I can't.

I talked about it with one of the persons who comes to my flat once a week to chat. They have had lots of different persons to come by and I just can't keep on doing that. I don't feel like I'm moving in any direction. By the I'm not sure I have actually told too much about this on here. But a few-ish years ago I was diagnosed with dysthymia and I am now on disability pension. And trying to get well enough to get rid of that and be able to get and hold a job and be a normal citizen.

Anywho, I talked with this lady about how I feel about it all and that I feel I need some more help as I can't figure out how the fuck to get my brain to understand a few basic facts about life. . . or rather feel them. I live too much on my emotions. I can't arse myself to do stuff that I find boring. And I have a fairly mild social anxiety to boot so that don't help either.

So in short: I'm starting to drown but I have reached out. I think this is just as much to type it out for myself. To admit somethings wrong and I need to fight a bit harder now to keep myself from falling down that hole that scares the living shit out of me. I don't want to take up cutting again. I don't want to get a rope again. That shit is scary and I'm not sure I'll survive a second trip there.
But it's still a fairly long distance away.

I guess that I'm able to see it before it take too much of a hold does say something about how far I have become. So there's that. I guess.

Hang with us dude...we are here and willing to talk to you. Unfortunately we can't do much more due to distance. But we are here and we care.

I am glad you recognized the signs before things slipped too far. You aren't alone in dealing with depression.

We are here....we care. You matter to us a great deal.

Hugs

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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11-10-2015, 02:07 PM
RE: So tired.
Awwww. Big hugs friend.

It is good you can see it coming.

Depression is just awful. Heart


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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11-10-2015, 02:13 PM
RE: So tired.
I'm sorry you are going through all of that and I'm glad you reached out to to the group for support. I truly hope things get easier for you to manage. Hug

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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11-10-2015, 02:56 PM
RE: So tired.
Depression sucks. Lethargy sucks.

Sounds like you are at the verge of pulling yourself up by your boot straps though. Reaching out and asking for help is wonderful.

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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11-10-2015, 05:00 PM
RE: So tired.
Recognizing the problem exists is a positive step.

Break it down into digestible chunks and as you tackle each smaller one, you'll gain the confidence to address the rest.

Hang in there, brotha.
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11-10-2015, 07:12 PM
RE: So tired.
Hey Nishi. Hang in there mate. There's light on the other side.

I don't know exactly how you are but you know my situation. I was supposed to visit the drum shop but had to put it off until Wed. It is just day by day mate and try not to take it too seriously.

And don't hesitate to call me. If I am home I'll pick up.

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
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11-10-2015, 11:40 PM
RE: So tired.
Thanks, guys I love all of you.
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12-10-2015, 12:15 AM
RE: So tired.
You're a good Joe .... I don't care what they say about you. Big Grin
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12-10-2015, 02:12 AM
RE: So tired.
(11-10-2015 01:49 PM)Nishi Karano Kaze Wrote:  And trying to get well enough to get rid of that and be able to get and hold a job and be a normal citizen.

You are a normal citizen.
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