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06-09-2011, 07:27 PM
RE: Something funny
How . . . do . . . people . . . believe . . . this . . . SHIT. It blows my mind that intelligent people really think Noahs Ark is historically accurate. A 500 year old dude built a freaking boat at big enough to hold Dinosaurs. But mention evolution and they give you that smart ass smirk that says "Wow that's just dumb". I swear my head is going to explode.
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07-09-2011, 10:58 AM
RE: Something funny
(06-09-2011 07:27 PM)free2011 Wrote:  A 500 year old dude built a freaking boat at big enough to hold Dinosaurs.

Dinosaurs wouldn't take up much room if they had just been hatched.

Quote:Dinosaur eggs vary in size, depending on the species. Among the largest are fossilized dinosaur eggs collected in the mid 1990s from Late Cretaceous rocks in China. These eggs are more than 60 cm (2 ft.) long and about 20 cm (8 in.) in diameter.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dinosaur_egg

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07-09-2011, 11:17 AM
RE: Something funny
Noah' Ark is just stupid.


"Collecting the animals

Noah was ordered by God to gather two of every species of animal (Gen. 6:19) to bring on the ark. How did he get most of these animals from other parts of the world? It is highly unlikely that all the species of animals that have ever existed all lived near Noah. How were the animals loaded on the ark? Noah had 7 days, from the time the ark was finished, until the flood waters came, to get the animals on board.

For the number of animals Noah had to take on the ark, 2 would have to be had been loaded every second, without stopping, to beat the deadline. How could Noah have gathered male and female of each kind when some species are asexual, others have only females, and others are hermaphrodites?

Although the ark is described as a big boat, it's not even close to being big enough to house two (and in some cases seven) of every known species of animal that has ever existed, excluding ocean life. Modern ocean liners are more than twice as big as the ark, and even they aren't big enough for this momentous task. Genesis states that Noah had to take seven of every clean species on the ark, the male and his female.

Some theologians are unclear as to whether this means seven animals or seven PAIRS of animals. In any case, this just causes more crowding on the ark. The Bible does not suggest that any species became extinct prior to the flood. This means that every land animal that has ever existed, including those that are now extinct, had to have been represented on the ark. Considering the number of species of dinosaur that have been found, and their size, these alone would not have been able to fit on the ark. Creationists like to claim that the dinosaurs did not make it on the ark, and the flood was the cause of their extinction. Again, the Bible does not suggest that ANY animal missed the ark. Besides, Noah was given a direct order by God take every beast, fowl and any other living thing that crept upon the earth, onto the ark.

Since everything that crept was to be included, this means every species of insect would also had to have been represented, everything from aphids to Goliath beetles. There are currently 16,000 different species of ants alone, and that is just what is presently living, not counting any species that has become extinct. If Noah had to take two of every kind of animal on board the ark, he not only had to take two snakes on board, but two kinds of every snake. He not only had to take two cobras, two pythons, two boas, two rattlesnakes, etc., but he had to take two of every kind of cobra, python, boa, rattlesnake, etc.

An ark of the size specified in the Bible would not be large enough to carry a cargo of animals and food sufficient to re-populate the earth, especially if animals that are now extinct were required to be aboard. Do you know how much food an elephant needs per day? Hundreds of pounds."


Sorry Theo, but Noah's Ark is one of the stupidest fairy tales to come out of the bible. I also understand that this story is found in other religious books as well, and I'm sure it is one of the stupidest tales to be found within those. I also understand that great floods have taken place, and will take place again in the future of Earth, but I also understand that there are currently a fuck load of species on this planet and there used to be more. We still find new ones to this day. So to believe that Noah and his boys managed to gather them all and somehow store them on his ark, is .... embarrassing. Adding that the dinosaurs could have been loaded up as eggs is no sillier. Tell me first off how to gather all of those eggs without being fucking eaten. Then tell me how they were stored. Then tell me that they just got lucky to not have them hatch while on board. Or that none of the eggs broke during transport thereby extinguishing a species. Or that the eggs wouldn't somehow be eaten by one of the many egg eating species being kept aboard. How all of the animals were fed by only eight people. Daily. I can't .... |Argh... maugh... fuck. Just come on... please, it's fucking stupid. Plain and simple it's absolutely fucking stupid.

A link to the website I quoted.Never been here before I just copied and pasted the first thing to come up.

"I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments." -Jim Morrison
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07-09-2011, 11:39 AM
RE: Something funny
(06-09-2011 07:08 AM)TheBeardedDude Wrote:  A bunch of different extinct dinosaurs but not one extant mammal...curious...

LOL

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07-09-2011, 12:02 PM
RE: Something funny
(07-09-2011 11:39 AM)NotSoVacuous Wrote:  
(06-09-2011 07:08 AM)TheBeardedDude Wrote:  A bunch of different extinct dinosaurs but not one extant mammal...curious...

LOL

These inconsistencies are never mentioned...obviously...

“Science is simply common sense at its best, that is, rigidly accurate in observation, and merciless to fallacy in logic.”
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08-09-2011, 11:06 AM
RE: Something funny
(07-09-2011 11:17 AM)lucradis Wrote:  Noah was ordered by God to gather two of every species of animal (Gen. 6:19) to bring on the ark. How did he get most of these animals from other parts of the world? It is highly unlikely that all the species of animals that have ever existed all lived near Noah. How were the animals loaded on the ark? Noah had 7 days, from the time the ark was finished, until the flood waters came, to get the animals on board.

Whoever wrote this obviously hasn't studied the Bible very carefully. Noah wasn't ordered to gather two of every species but two of every kind.

Quote:The first thing that needs to be addressed is “what is a kind?” Often, people are confused into thinking that a “species” is a “kind.” But this isn’t necessarily so. A species is a man-made term used in the modern classification system. And frankly, the word species is difficult to define, whether one is a creationist or not!

Instead, the Bible uses the term “kind.” The Bible’s first use of this word (Hebrew: min) is found in Genesis 1 when God creates plants and animals “according to their kinds.” It is used again in Genesis 6, 8 when God instructed Noah to take two of every kind of animal onto the Ark and also in God’s command for the animals to reproduce after the Flood. A plain reading of the text infers that plants and animals were created to reproduce within the boundaries of their kind. Evidence to support this concept is clearly seen (or rather not seen) in our world today, as there are no reports of dats (dog + cat) or hows (horse + cow)! So, a good rule of thumb is that if two things can breed together, then they are of the same created kind. It is a bit more complicated than this, but for the time being, this is a quick measure of a “kind.”

As an example, dogs can easily breed with one another, whether wolves, dingoes, coyotes, or domestic dogs. When dogs breed together, you get dogs; so there is a dog kind. It works the same with chickens. There are several breeds of chickens, but chickens breed with each other and you still get chickens. So, there is a chicken kind. The concept is fairly easy to understand.

But in today’s culture, where evolution and millions of years are taught as fact, many have been led to believe that animals and plants (that are classed as a specific “species”) have been like this for tens of thousands of years and perhaps millions of years. So, when they see things like lions or zebras, they think they have been like this for an extremely long time.

From a biblical perspective, though, land animals like wolves, zebras, sheep, lions, and so on have at least two ancestors that lived on Noah’s Ark, only about 4,300 years ago. These animals have undergone many changes since that time. But dogs are still part of the dog kind, cats are still part of the cat kind, and so on. God placed variety within the original kinds, and other variation has occurred since the Fall due to genetic alterations.

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles...-wholphins

Quote:I also understand that this story is found in other religious books as well, and I'm sure it is one of the stupidest tales to be found within those.

Doesn't the fact that every culture has some kind of legend of a world wide flood indicate that such a flood actually took place? Here is a good place to find out more about what the Bible actually teaches about the flood.

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/am/v2/n2

The information in ancient libraries came from real minds of real people. The far more complex information in cells came from the far more intelligent mind of God.
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09-09-2011, 06:11 PM
RE: Something funny
(08-09-2011 11:06 AM)theophilus Wrote:  
(07-09-2011 11:17 AM)lucradis Wrote:  Noah was ordered by God to gather two of every species of animal (Gen. 6:19) to bring on the ark. How did he get most of these animals from other parts of the world? It is highly unlikely that all the species of animals that have ever existed all lived near Noah. How were the animals loaded on the ark? Noah had 7 days, from the time the ark was finished, until the flood waters came, to get the animals on board.

Whoever wrote this obviously hasn't studied the Bible very carefully. Noah wasn't ordered to gather two of every species but two of every kind.

Quote:The first thing that needs to be addressed is “what is a kind?” Often, people are confused into thinking that a “species” is a “kind.” But this isn’t necessarily so. A species is a man-made term used in the modern classification system. And frankly, the word species is difficult to define, whether one is a creationist or not!

Instead, the Bible uses the term “kind.” The Bible’s first use of this word (Hebrew: min) is found in Genesis 1 when God creates plants and animals “according to their kinds.” It is used again in Genesis 6, 8 when God instructed Noah to take two of every kind of animal onto the Ark and also in God’s command for the animals to reproduce after the Flood. A plain reading of the text infers that plants and animals were created to reproduce within the boundaries of their kind. Evidence to support this concept is clearly seen (or rather not seen) in our world today, as there are no reports of dats (dog + cat) or hows (horse + cow)! So, a good rule of thumb is that if two things can breed together, then they are of the same created kind. It is a bit more complicated than this, but for the time being, this is a quick measure of a “kind.”

As an example, dogs can easily breed with one another, whether wolves, dingoes, coyotes, or domestic dogs. When dogs breed together, you get dogs; so there is a dog kind. It works the same with chickens. There are several breeds of chickens, but chickens breed with each other and you still get chickens. So, there is a chicken kind. The concept is fairly easy to understand.

But in today’s culture, where evolution and millions of years are taught as fact, many have been led to believe that animals and plants (that are classed as a specific “species”) have been like this for tens of thousands of years and perhaps millions of years. So, when they see things like lions or zebras, they think they have been like this for an extremely long time.

From a biblical perspective, though, land animals like wolves, zebras, sheep, lions, and so on have at least two ancestors that lived on Noah’s Ark, only about 4,300 years ago. These animals have undergone many changes since that time. But dogs are still part of the dog kind, cats are still part of the cat kind, and so on. God placed variety within the original kinds, and other variation has occurred since the Fall due to genetic alterations.

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles...-wholphins

That only attempts to explain how they may have physically fit on the ark (which is still dubious, get back to me when you can quantify how many kinds there were and what their average size may have been). It still is laughably inept at explaining the logistics of getting each creature into the ark (ie penguins in the desert) and how they were all fed and cleaned up after by 8 people, let alone prevented from devouring one another or stepping on one another.

Quote:I also understand that this story is found in other religious books as well, and I'm sure it is one of the stupidest tales to be found within those.

Doesn't the fact that every culture has some kind of legend of a world wide flood indicate that such a flood actually took place? Here is a good place to find out more about what the Bible actually teaches about the flood.

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/am/v2/n2

No, since it's highly likely that they just plagiarized from one another because they liked the story or found it useful. The geographic proximity of the sources (gilgamesh being the other account I'm familiar with) bolsters the plagiarism explanation. [/b]

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07-01-2012, 12:16 PM (This post was last modified: 07-01-2012 12:22 PM by The Intrepid Atheist.)
RE: Something funny
I wonder how they fed all of those dinosaurs, not to mention how they fit on such small a boat that an old man and three young sons could have built it.
Dumbass.
(07-09-2011 10:58 AM)theophilus Wrote:  
(06-09-2011 07:27 PM)free2011 Wrote:  A 500 year old dude built a freaking boat at big enough to hold Dinosaurs.

Dinosaurs wouldn't take up much room if they had just been hatched.

Quote:Dinosaur eggs vary in size, depending on the species. Among the largest are fossilized dinosaur eggs collected in the mid 1990s from Late Cretaceous rocks in China. These eggs are more than 60 cm (2 ft.) long and about 20 cm (8 in.) in diameter.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dinosaur_egg

Once again, you have no idea of what you are talking about. Did you read of how long it takes for the eggs to hatch, and how quickly they would grow, not to mention the klack of their habitat?
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07-01-2012, 03:32 PM
RE: Something funny
(06-09-2011 01:40 PM)BnW Wrote:  Didn't the flood come from all directions though? It rained all over the world for 40 days and 40 nights, and the water rose to a level of 29,000 feet and came from every direction at once and from within the Earth as well. So, how would the animals pick a direction to run? I mean, even if you believe the flood myth that just makes zero sense.

God told 'em to run that way so's that some brain damaged guy could write an article on them 6000 years later.

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07-01-2012, 03:48 PM
RE: Something funny
What makes me laugh about the article is how the obvious is ignored. They mention "fleeing from a predator" then say that it doesn't make sense since some of the tracks are from large dinos that are not likely to be fleeing. Did they consider that perhaps the large prints ARE the predators? Isn't it obvious tat the predators would make tracks through the same place, and in the same direction, as the prey they are persuing??

Then the articles wraps up with a triumphant, "see!! Those evolutionists are twisting things to fit their beliefs!!! Yay, we win" So it makes more sense that all the animals were fleeing a flood, rather than fleeing a predator, who followed the prey through the same muddy path.

Not to mention, they very well could have been fleeing a flash flood. Shit like that happens all the time! Does that mean next spring when my fields flood, I can expect Noah to float by sometime after lunch?

Fucktards.

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