Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
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31-03-2013, 10:02 AM
Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
It's storming pretty bad around these parts. Lightning, thunder, hail and high winds on the Easter holiday and that got me wondering...

What is God punishing the little children for today? What egregious act has been done that caused the creator to ruin all these Easter egg hunts and all the loving fellowship with annoying family members that surrounds them?

At first I thought He was punishing the little children because I've known myself in the flesh but then I got to thinking.... I've been knowing myself pretty regularly since I was eight years old so it can't be that.

Why do you think the little children are being punished on Easter?

The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. - Chinese Proverb
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31-03-2013, 10:11 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
(31-03-2013 10:02 AM)bbeljefe Wrote:  It's storming pretty bad around these parts. Lightning, thunder, hail and high winds on the Easter holiday and that got me wondering...

What is God punishing the little children for today? What egregious act has been done that caused the creator to ruin all these Easter egg hunts and all the loving fellowship with annoying family members that surrounds them?

At first I thought He was punishing the little children because I've known myself in the flesh but then I got to thinking.... I've been knowing myself pretty regularly since I was eight years old so it can't be that.

Why do you think the little children are being punished on Easter?

They didnt burn enough homosexuals, duh. FFS learn some basic weather patterns. God needs burning gays to stop the weather from going all wacked out. I mean how else are you gonna get their Homochrons into the atmosphere to prevent hurricanes and earthquakes? Evil_monster

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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31-03-2013, 10:59 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
(31-03-2013 10:11 AM)Revenant77x Wrote:  
(31-03-2013 10:02 AM)bbeljefe Wrote:  It's storming pretty bad around these parts. Lightning, thunder, hail and high winds on the Easter holiday and that got me wondering...

What is God punishing the little children for today? What egregious act has been done that caused the creator to ruin all these Easter egg hunts and all the loving fellowship with annoying family members that surrounds them?

At first I thought He was punishing the little children because I've known myself in the flesh but then I got to thinking.... I've been knowing myself pretty regularly since I was eight years old so it can't be that.

Why do you think the little children are being punished on Easter?

They didnt burn enough homosexuals, duh. FFS learn some basic weather patterns. God needs burning gays to stop the weather from going all wacked out. I mean how else are you gonna get their Homochrons into the atmosphere to prevent hurricanes and earthquakes? Evil_monster

Well duh. Why didn't I think about that. Hell, my neighbors on the west side are gay guys. No wonder He's making it rain so hard here.

I wonder if I can just pray that they will suffer from their evil fornicating or if I actually have to go and burn them?

The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. - Chinese Proverb
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31-03-2013, 11:07 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
(31-03-2013 10:59 AM)bbeljefe Wrote:  
(31-03-2013 10:11 AM)Revenant77x Wrote:  They didnt burn enough homosexuals, duh. FFS learn some basic weather patterns. God needs burning gays to stop the weather from going all wacked out. I mean how else are you gonna get their Homochrons into the atmosphere to prevent hurricanes and earthquakes? Evil_monster

Well duh. Why didn't I think about that. Hell, my neighbors on the west side are gay guys. No wonder He's making it rain so hard here.

I wonder if I can just pray that they will suffer from their evil fornicating or if I actually have to go and burn them?

Thats a tough call but when in doubt burn the heretics!Hobo

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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31-03-2013, 11:24 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
(31-03-2013 11:07 AM)Revenant77x Wrote:  
(31-03-2013 10:59 AM)bbeljefe Wrote:  Well duh. Why didn't I think about that. Hell, my neighbors on the west side are gay guys. No wonder He's making it rain so hard here.

I wonder if I can just pray that they will suffer from their evil fornicating or if I actually have to go and burn them?

Thats a tough call but when in doubt burn the heretics!Hobo


I think I'll just try sacrificing a goat or something first. I don't want to get tangled up in MAN'S LAW again.

The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. - Chinese Proverb
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31-03-2013, 11:42 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
(31-03-2013 11:24 AM)bbeljefe Wrote:  
(31-03-2013 11:07 AM)Revenant77x Wrote:  Thats a tough call but when in doubt burn the heretics!Hobo


I think I'll just try sacrificing a goat or something first. I don't want to get tangled up in MAN'S LAW again.

Nononononono You'll get PETA after you if ya do that. They're by far worse than the Law.

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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31-03-2013, 11:43 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
(31-03-2013 11:42 AM)Revenant77x Wrote:  
(31-03-2013 11:24 AM)bbeljefe Wrote:  I think I'll just try sacrificing a goat or something first. I don't want to get tangled up in MAN'S LAW again.

Nononononono You'll get PETA after you if ya do that. They're by far worse than the Law.

Maybe they'll send some of those naked bitches to my house to protest?

The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. - Chinese Proverb
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31-03-2013, 11:52 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
Maybe god made it rain because he's tired of Christians pretending this pagan holiday has anything to do with Christianity?

Maybe he's tired of Christians not even bothering to change the name of the holiday (much) from the god they stole it from?

Or maybe he's tired of Christians turning the biggest religious event ever into a merchandising day about eggs and candy and baskets of fake grass and bunnies and such.

Or maybe sometimes rain just happens.

"Whores perform the same function as priests, but far more thoroughly." - Robert A. Heinlein
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31-03-2013, 11:56 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
"Or maybe sometimes rain just happens. " Laughat

The beginning of wisdom is to call things by their right names. - Chinese Proverb
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31-03-2013, 11:56 AM
RE: Speaking of Rain on Easter and Divine Punishment...
(31-03-2013 11:43 AM)bbeljefe Wrote:  
(31-03-2013 11:42 AM)Revenant77x Wrote:  Nononononono You'll get PETA after you if ya do that. They're by far worse than the Law.

Maybe they'll send some of those naked bitches to my house to protest?

Hmmm well that if it is gods will that a bunch of nekkid hippy chicks go hang out in your yard well that would just be part of his unknowable plan. Drooling

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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