Stupid Husband Stories
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08-01-2015, 10:31 PM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(08-01-2015 10:30 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(08-01-2015 09:30 PM)LadyJane Wrote:  It was not my intention to insult, please tell me how I did so? I was merely reacting in shock and amaze.

He's easily offended. 'Cause he's gay and whatnot.

And sensitive...don't forget sensitive.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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12-01-2015, 08:23 PM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
So... My husband does not know how to work the remotes in our entertainment area. We have one for the TV, one for the cable box, and one for the DVD player. We use all three for different reasons depending on what we're watching obviously. I just found out that if he wants to pause what we're watching, he just starts picking up remotes until I stop saying "no" Facepalm Laugh out load

I hope that the world turns, and things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. - V for Vendetta
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12-01-2015, 08:37 PM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(12-01-2015 08:23 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  So... My husband does not know how to work the remotes in our entertainment area. We have one for the TV, one for the cable box, and one for the DVD player. We use all three for different reasons depending on what we're watching obviously. I just found out that if he wants to pause what we're watching, he just starts picking up remotes until I stop saying "no" Facepalm Laugh out load

That should work. It's an exhaustive search pruned by oracle feedback. Big Grin

There is only one really serious philosophical question, and that is suicide. -Camus
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12-01-2015, 08:57 PM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(12-01-2015 08:37 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(12-01-2015 08:23 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  So... My husband does not know how to work the remotes in our entertainment area. We have one for the TV, one for the cable box, and one for the DVD player. We use all three for different reasons depending on what we're watching obviously. I just found out that if he wants to pause what we're watching, he just starts picking up remotes until I stop saying "no" Facepalm Laugh out load

That should work. It's an exhaustive search pruned by oracle feedback. Big Grin

The Oracle, through remote viewing, will help you find 'The One'.
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13-01-2015, 01:11 AM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(12-01-2015 08:23 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  So... My husband does not know how to work the remotes in our entertainment area. We have one for the TV, one for the cable box, and one for the DVD player. We use all three for different reasons depending on what we're watching obviously. I just found out that if he wants to pause what we're watching, he just starts picking up remotes until I stop saying "no" Facepalm Laugh out load

You allow your [sic] husband control of the remote?

Wow! That's a healthy marriage.

Yes

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13-01-2015, 09:56 AM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
Here is mine: I can't find things. I swear I look but everything I look for eludes me. I have lost things that I'm holding . But, things love my wife and appear magically for her. So, whenever I'm looking for something, I call for her to help me find it. And, usually she finds it sitting out in pain site right in front of me. She says the problem is I'm not really looking, but I think things just don't like me and hide from me.

Btw, my wife has a slightly different take on this that is totally consistent with the thread theme.

Shackle their minds when they're bent on the cross
When ignorance reigns, life is lost
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13-01-2015, 11:22 AM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(13-01-2015 09:56 AM)BnW Wrote:  I have lost things that I'm holding.

I spent about 5 minutes a few days ago trying to find my keys. I checked everywhere I usually put them and everywhere I could remember having been when I last used them. It was only when I moved them from my left hand to my right in order to reach for something less awkwardly that it occurred to me that I knew where they were...

Facepalm

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13-01-2015, 12:22 PM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(13-01-2015 11:22 AM)unfogged Wrote:  
(13-01-2015 09:56 AM)BnW Wrote:  I have lost things that I'm holding.

I spent about 5 minutes a few days ago trying to find my keys. I checked everywhere I usually put them and everywhere I could remember having been when I last used them. It was only when I moved them from my left hand to my right in order to reach for something less awkwardly that it occurred to me that I knew where they were...

Facepalm

This sort of thing used to happen to me, but only when I was baked. It has never happened since I stopped smoking pot.

Smokin
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13-01-2015, 06:03 PM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(13-01-2015 09:56 AM)BnW Wrote:  Here is mine: I can't find things. I swear I look but everything I look for eludes me. I have lost things that I'm holding . But, things love my wife and appear magically for her. So, whenever I'm looking for something, I call for her to help me find it. And, usually she finds it sitting out in pain site right in front of me. She says the problem is I'm not really looking, but I think things just don't like me and hide from me.

Btw, my wife has a slightly different take on this that is totally consistent with the thread theme.

Aahh!!! We are the same way, except opposite. I go to look for something, absolutely CANNOT find it. I call for the husband to help, he finds it right away. I swear that happens 80% of the time I ask for his help.

(13-01-2015 12:22 PM)Grasshopper Wrote:  
(13-01-2015 11:22 AM)unfogged Wrote:  I spent about 5 minutes a few days ago trying to find my keys. I checked everywhere I usually put them and everywhere I could remember having been when I last used them. It was only when I moved them from my left hand to my right in order to reach for something less awkwardly that it occurred to me that I knew where they were...

Facepalm

This sort of thing used to happen to me, but only when I was baked. It has never happened since I stopped smoking pot.

Smokin

Reminds me of the standup Nick Swardson did. He said when he quit smoking weed it was like he suddenly had super powers.. "Where are my keys???? Oh, they're right here in my pocket. Gasp HOW DID I KNOW THAT??? Gasp "

I hope that the world turns, and things get better. But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that, even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you, I love you. With all my heart, I love you. - V for Vendetta
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13-01-2015, 06:31 PM
RE: Stupid Husband Stories
(12-01-2015 08:23 PM)Smercury44 Wrote:  So... My husband does not know how to work the remotes in our entertainment area. We have one for the TV, one for the cable box, and one for the DVD player. We use all three for different reasons depending on what we're watching obviously. I just found out that if he wants to pause what we're watching, he just starts picking up remotes until I stop saying "no" Facepalm Laugh out load

Since I am not allowed to ever decide what is watched it's apparently best for me to never learn what remote does what. If I want to watch a DVD, even when home alone, I don't watch it on the giant flat screen I watch on my laptop. Heaven forbid I mess up the settings on the TV or anything connected to it.

I can manage the DVR, when my stuff doesn't get mysteriously deleted to make room for more fascinating fare like Duck Dynasty or the Barrett Jackson auto auction. Censored

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

We're all mad here. The Cheshire Cat
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