TTA Zombie Survival Skills
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13-10-2014, 09:40 AM
TTA Zombie Survival Skills
My favorite TV show is The Walking Dead. Last night was the season premiere and it got me thinking about how I would survive an apocalypse.

Why should you be a part of my clan? What skills do you have that would be useful in a zombie apocalypse? Feel free to inflate your ego and share what would make you a survival of the fittest badass.


So, TTA, here's our lovely scenario. The Rapture occurs today: Christian souls disappear to heaven where they are forced to spend eternity in bowing in worship to the psychopathic Jehovah. Persons of other faiths have their souls banished to hell. The dead rise up out of the ground. The theists alive at the rapture leave behind their walking, thoughtless bodies. God curses the Zombies to eat living human flesh as a memorial to the Christ. We atheists are left behind to deal with the aftermath of a collapsed societal infrastructure.

[Image: frabz-Zombie-Jesus-Died-for-our-sins-but...8c0bfe.jpg]


I'll go first!

- As a former ER nurse, I have experience with traumatic injuries, a wide range of disease processes, chemical and radiation exposures.

-I was trained in management of aggressive behavior and got in a few fights in the emergency department. I can be scrappy.

- I've been shooting guns since I was 10. I also have no qualms about shooting a zombie fucker in the head. Hobo

- I have lived on a farm. I know how to build fences - I'll supervise.

- I know how to grow veggies, strip sugar cane, etc

- I'm a good cook.

[Image: the-walking-dead-meme-600x376.jpg]

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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13-10-2014, 09:44 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
I am good at growing a lot of fruit and veg in a very small area.

Not bad at the martial arts although out of practise.

Comfortable with the effects of adrenaline.

Able to learn new skills.
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13-10-2014, 09:48 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
Years of first aid experience.

Can move faster than an ungainly shuffle.

Good cook.

Hate the belief, love the believer.
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13-10-2014, 09:50 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
And you have my smart-assed-ness.

[Image: 4851635+_ff073960ed733d2bb2cdf747e6044710.jpg]

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

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13-10-2014, 09:51 AM (This post was last modified: 13-10-2014 09:54 AM by Chas.)
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
Knowledgeable and skilled in fixing mechanical/electronic stuff.

Reasonably good outdoor survival skills.

First aid and CPR training.

Thirty five years of organizational and management experience.

Skilled marksman, no qualms about pulling the trigger.

Possess enough guns and ammunition to arm a squad.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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13-10-2014, 09:53 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
bows, arrows, guns, knives, whatever works.

spent many years playing in cemetaries, woods, farms, camping. I'm good with the outdoorsy, gotta stand on the wall concept.

nose is very sensitive to smell, so I should be able to smell them coming from quite a distance.

EDITED to add, years as an EMT, I can save you or use you as bait, don't piss me off.


"Life is a daring adventure or it is nothing"--Helen Keller
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13-10-2014, 09:54 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
I'm also handy with an egg whisk and a wood chipper.

Hate the belief, love the believer.
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13-10-2014, 10:08 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
(13-10-2014 09:54 AM)Elder Cunningham Wrote:  I'm also handy with an egg whisk and a wood chipper.

... and really good at making up limericks!

All those long nights around a single campfire will get quite tedious.
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13-10-2014, 10:08 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
In pretty good shape, no need for inaccessible medications. Have a basic arsenal of firearms, swords, spears, machetes. Have basic mechanical, electronic repair skills.

And have seen every Walking Dead episode.

Gods derive their power from post-hoc rationalizations. -The Inquisition

Using the supernatural to explain events in your life is a failure of the intellect to comprehend the world around you. -The Inquisition
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13-10-2014, 10:08 AM
RE: TTA Zombie Survival Skills
(13-10-2014 09:53 AM)Bows and Arrows Wrote:  years as an EMT, I can save you or use you as bait, don't piss me off.

That's the spirit!

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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