Tempted to relapse......
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27-10-2016, 01:37 PM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
(27-10-2016 01:34 PM)TurkeyBurner Wrote:  I still pray when I am extremely anxious about things. I just changed "god" to "fuck"... E.g., "Oh fuck, please let this not be an STD.... amen."

Laugh out load

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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27-10-2016, 04:13 PM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
(24-10-2016 01:48 PM)jason197754 Wrote:  I still consider myself to be a recovering catholic. But I find myself falling back into denial about my atheism and agnosticism.....and bargaining as well....trying to reconcile faith/religion with science/reason and logic.... Any suggestions or advice??? Thanks.....

One of the major turning points before becoming an atheists was when I started looking into Cults. I was at a point in my life where I wanted to know more about the religion I was had been brought up on. (Roman Catholic) And got side tracked with cults.

Delving deeply I wanted to know how people could fall for these crazy ideas. But the more I started judging them, the more I started judging myself. Why was it crazy to consider an alien overlord throwing atomic bombs into valcanos, to fill the world with Thatons (sciontology) Or jumping on the back of a comet so that they could meet space jesus (Heavens Gate) But when I came to a man healing people and flying into the sky when he died more realistic?

Soon after I considered fell more into Theism and alien visitation stuff. With conflicting ideas from all angles I became more skeptical. Which allowed me to finally break free.

I had that Ol' Catholic guilt the first few years. As time when on it became less and less frequent.

What I usually told myself when it happened would be. If a being would see fit to torture me for something I honestly don't know. Would I really want to be any part of that beings exsitance? It seemed to go threw a lot of trouble to hide itself.

Or would I feel the same way if some ET life form came down and claim to have created us? Would I be less judgment or worried about another thing I know nothing about.

Fear is a powerful motivator. When groups using it for indoctrination, it can take a long time to get out.

I made a thread on some cults. If I ever get clearance to watch videos again on my computer I may add more.

http://www.thethinkingatheist.com/forum/...ough-cults

It's been a while since i've touched it. But i'm was revisiting some of the cults that motivated me to leave the catholic church for good. It was a bunch of woman that would only have sex with the leader. He would get them while they were young impregnating them when they were in their early teens. It was creepy when the reports would do interviews with them they would all say the same lines in perfect unison. "Everything is fine. We just want our famliy back."

Any way hope that helps a little. We're always here to vent if you need to.

Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
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27-10-2016, 04:27 PM
Tempted to relapse......
(24-10-2016 01:48 PM)jason197754 Wrote:  I still consider myself to be a recovering catholic. But I find myself falling back into denial about my atheism and agnosticism.....and bargaining as well....trying to reconcile faith/religion with science/reason and logic.... Any suggestions or advice??? Thanks.....


Don't take this the wrong way but when I quit believing in Santa Clause I just couldn't bring myself to believe it ever again.

The same thing happened to me with religion. I just couldn't believe in it anymore. The odd thing was I did keep going to church for a short time afterwards. Odd.
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29-10-2016, 12:16 PM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
(27-10-2016 04:27 PM)KUSA Wrote:  
(24-10-2016 01:48 PM)jason197754 Wrote:  I still consider myself to be a recovering catholic. But I find myself falling back into denial about my atheism and agnosticism.....and bargaining as well....trying to reconcile faith/religion with science/reason and logic.... Any suggestions or advice??? Thanks.....


Don't take this the wrong way but when I quit believing in Santa Clause I just couldn't bring myself to believe it ever again.

The same thing happened to me with religion. I just couldn't believe in it anymore. The odd thing was I did keep going to church for a short time afterwards. Odd.

I've contemplated about that as well. I had a religious conversation with my wife just the other day (the first one we've ever had that didn't end with he yelling and just stomping out of the room) during of which I asked her about Santa beliefs.

She told me she didn't stop believing in Santa Clause till she was 12. Mostly because her mother kept up the russ for so long. It wasn't until she found the hiding place of her Xmas presents and confronted her mother about it was that the disillusion collapsed.

So what I think it may be. Is being a social species we rely on our "pack" a great deal. Deep down we want people to like us. Even if a person doesn't, they still depend on strangers to survive. So If this belief is stretched over great periods of time, with little to no contradiction. It's never challenged.

So when everyone around you let's say, believes red is the best color, and blue is the worst. Even if you like blue more. If asked "What's the best color?" You most likely will respond with red. You're trained to respond that one way. Because that part of you that wants to fit it depends on it. What if I say Blue people will question why I think blue is the best color. Then they might extradite me. Then where would I be?

So lots of information is out about the history of the story of Santa. And it's an esaly depunked fable. But if I recall correctly it was all the other kids that stoped believing in santa before me. And I eventually questioned my mother on it. And she confirmed the my questoins where correct. I would imagen the same could happen with any god.

Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
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03-11-2016, 07:38 AM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
Hi again...I went to my therapist the other day...and well...I still consider myself to be a Recovering catholic. I mean...20% of me still likes the ritual...the smells and bells.... But I am a freethinker and a humanist and Agnostic....and an atheist in the closet....but I feel likevIve gone somewhat back into the stages of denial and barging...any ideas, suggestions, or advice??? Thanks......
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03-11-2016, 07:44 AM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
At work.

Hug

If you're getting comfort from the rituals and such why not just keep going?

It's being given to you for free, it's not like you have to put money in the collection plate.

Smile, nod, be happy and bask in the free rituals happening for your benefit. Yeah, you know it's all smoke and mirrors/bells and whistles, it's the comfort and safe thoughts that count.

Thumbsup
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03-11-2016, 07:46 AM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
Aww ty....but what about the bad..ugly...dark history of the catholic church?
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03-11-2016, 07:53 AM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
(03-11-2016 07:46 AM)jason197754 Wrote:  Aww ty....but what about the bad..ugly...dark history of the catholic church?

Every church has its dodgy history for example the episcopal church is founded on the family values of Henry VIII. Just don't sweat it enjoy the bells and smells there's nothing wrong with that and in time you will mostly likely outgrow it, I know I did.
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03-11-2016, 08:12 AM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
(03-11-2016 07:46 AM)jason197754 Wrote:  Aww ty....but what about the bad..ugly...dark history of the catholic church?

Going against my fellows I would advise you to focus yourself towards other activities that would be actually productive.

Perhaps learn and/or practice something you always admired and wanted to learn, that could be even philosophy to give you a solid fundation as a humanist, well that really depends on you, this was only an example.

When I lost everything I turned to dialectics and rhetoric and now I'm a very annoying person but I love myself Big Grin

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That which can be destroyed by the truth should be.”
-P.C. Hodgell - Seeker’s Mask - Kirien
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03-11-2016, 08:31 AM
RE: Tempted to relapse......
Can I ask why you find yourself denying your atheism and agnosticism?

Is it because the words are negatively loaded where you live or does religious thinking sneak its way back in your mind?

Does it help you when you decipher the words "atheist" and "agnostic" to take the load off and just reveal the simple meaning of lack of belief in a god/gods and the fact that you don't claim knowledge on the topic?
Does it help you when you remind yourself why you don't believe and why you don't claim knowledge?

Those two steps usually help me when I am tempted by unreasonable religious thoughts.

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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