The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
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30-10-2012, 05:04 AM
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
I look back now at "jesus metal" i listened to as an indoctrinated teenager... and now look at this "church" techno... and I have to wonder how silly it must sound.

EEE AA OO EE EE OO OO AA *JESUS* EE OO AA OO AA AA AA EEEEEEE *JESUS* FWUMP FWUMP FWUMP WUBWUBWUBWUB *JESUS* EE EEE EEEEEE OOO AAAAAA WUBWUB *JESUS...* WUBWUB (pause) *CHRIIIIIIIIIIIIST* (DROP BASS) UNCE UNCE UNCE UNCE UNCE UNCE UNCE

"OMG I FEEL THE HOLY SPIRIT I THINK! Did you feel it when they dropped the bass?"
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30-10-2012, 07:44 AM
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
(30-10-2012 01:03 AM)Dark Light Wrote:  Gotta' love Cracked!http://www.cracked.com/quick-fixes/the-5...to-be-hip/

Would you go to church if they upped their game?

Funny stuff! Smile

No I would not return to church for anything except for other people's weddings or funerals.

"Religion has caused more misery to all of mankind in every stage of human history than any other single idea." --Madalyn Murray O'Hair
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30-10-2012, 07:48 AM
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
(30-10-2012 02:34 AM)Dark Light Wrote:  
(30-10-2012 01:57 AM)Logisch Wrote:  What? No strippers?

Hmm...though that seems like an intentionally funny poke, there may be something to it. As we have seen, when attendance goes down, the rules get changed. That is why the Jews have done so well..."Wait, everyone want to eat shrimp now? Fuck it. We are REFORMED Jews, go ahead"...As attendance falls to the weigh-side even further, who knows what kind of Christian reformations we will see by the churches. I'm putting my money on stripper churches in western and northern Europe by 2030.

For the record there are already nudist (they prefer the term naturist now) churches in America, and I would suspect Europe as well. I would post a link, but I am unsure if I would be breaking a rule by doing that (as I brought up earlier Erx!) so I will let you do the googling if your interested. Not quite the same as erotic dancing, but I mean, they are naked.

Methinks this may be the longest, on most complex reply to a three word post ever in the history of the internet.Hobo
LOL, that seems like an anti-church. I mean, how could anyone sit in a room full of naked people and think about much else, let alone "God". Smile

"Religion has caused more misery to all of mankind in every stage of human history than any other single idea." --Madalyn Murray O'Hair
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30-10-2012, 07:57 AM
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
(30-10-2012 07:48 AM)Impulse Wrote:  
(30-10-2012 02:34 AM)Dark Light Wrote:  Hmm...though that seems like an intentionally funny poke, there may be something to it. As we have seen, when attendance goes down, the rules get changed. That is why the Jews have done so well..."Wait, everyone want to eat shrimp now? Fuck it. We are REFORMED Jews, go ahead"...As attendance falls to the weigh-side even further, who knows what kind of Christian reformations we will see by the churches. I'm putting my money on stripper churches in western and northern Europe by 2030.

For the record there are already nudist (they prefer the term naturist now) churches in America, and I would suspect Europe as well. I would post a link, but I am unsure if I would be breaking a rule by doing that (as I brought up earlier Erx!) so I will let you do the googling if your interested. Not quite the same as erotic dancing, but I mean, they are naked.

Methinks this may be the longest, on most complex reply to a three word post ever in the history of the internet.Hobo
LOL, that seems like an anti-church. I mean, how could anyone sit in a room full of naked people and think about much else, let alone "God". Smile

Hmm...Well, for one if you grow up all around nudity, it becomes no big deal. Secondly they see nudity as the natural state that God intended us to be in, not ashamed of, and Lastly, most of these old farts are fat with shriveled testicles as saggy tits. You would try to focus on God too if you were in there Smile

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30-10-2012, 10:45 AM
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
I guess they missed that part in the Bible where Adam and Eve instantly became naked and were ashamed. Tongue

"Religion has caused more misery to all of mankind in every stage of human history than any other single idea." --Madalyn Murray O'Hair
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30-10-2012, 11:42 AM
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
oh.... I thought this was gonna be a "finish my sentence" thread.
1. stupid sermons.
2. bad music.
3. drive in services
4. "you name it" preachers
5. preacher who is obviously gay saying why it's a sin

Tongue

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein
Those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music - Friedrich Nietzsche
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30-10-2012, 12:05 PM
 
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
Don't you know? Nowdays, most Christians don't like the label "Christian," "Religious," or Church. Most don't believe that Jesus is the only way to heaven and that all others go to hell (contrary to Jesus' teaching), and rock music (which used to be a sin) is now played openly in Church--to fill the pews where the plate is passed, especially since church attendance is on the decline, churches will do anything! Eventually, they'll be denying Christ altogether.

The way I see it: If they don't believe in their own religion, why should I? If their religion was true, then it never should have changed from day 1. If it's imperfect and not true, then there's no reason to subscribe to it.
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30-10-2012, 03:02 PM
RE: The 5 Most Embarrassing Ways Churches Are Trying to Be Hip
(30-10-2012 12:05 PM)Egor Wrote:  Don't you know? Nowdays, most Christians don't like the label "Christian," "Religious," or Church. Most don't believe that Jesus is the only way to heaven and that all others go to hell (contrary to Jesus' teaching), and rock music (which used to be a sin) is now played openly in Church--to fill the pews where the plate is passed, especially since church attendance is on the decline, churches will do anything! Eventually, they'll be denying Christ altogether.

The way I see it: If they don't believe in their own religion, why should I? If their religion was true, then it never should have changed from day 1. If it's imperfect and not true, then there's no reason to subscribe to it.

If they ignored christ, would that be a bad thing? All they need then is to get rid of their Holy Poltergeist, and their war god and they'd be right and dandy!

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