The Adventures of Nurse in Church
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08-03-2015, 12:25 PM
The Adventures of Nurse in Church
Last night I kicked it at the farm. Thought that might be one way for me to yet again skip church on a non-work weekend...I was wrong.

The power of Christ compelled me to go to a southern baptist church this morning - the parental units persuaded me, and for once I ran out of excuses. I tried saying I had no makeup or clothes (mom had a cute dress that fit me and matched my boots, and she had a drawer of extra makeup), the I'll be late if I shower excuse - "that's ok doll, just get there when you can, the first 45 minutes will just be singing, anyway", and she had a blow dryer and curling iron. Then she pulled out te big guns, she told my son "Mommy will meet us at church." Dammit.

Today's sermon was on prayer. Apparently, Father God is not obligated to answer prayers of the unsaved (must be why we atheists don't get heard). My marriage failed because we didn't pray enough. Others are blessed because they pray. Oh, and he only answers prayers if you call him by name, so it's gotta start with Yahweh, Eloheim, Mighty Creator of the Earth and Heavens. When I walked in (I was almost an hour late) the preacher was ranting about fornication and praying for God to take away lustful thoughts.

I'd like to present a fun outline of the sermon, but most of it was just rhetoric spun in circles.

The service closed with a beautiful duet. I actually cried a bit. As I'm sitting there contemplating the theatrics I've just suffered through, these two young people sang with such passion to an acoustic guitar. It made me think about why some religious music is so damn moving. It's not necessarily the words, it's the passion behind it, that glimpse into a person that if not presented in music would be highly intimate and private. At least I think that's it, I'm still trying to figure it out.


I'll be going to church quite a bit over this next year while I pick up my personal pieces and glue myself back together. I'll be at church on Easter for certain. I may start taking notes so I can come back here to vent and analyze. This closet sucks.
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08-03-2015, 12:41 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
Hug sterkte

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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08-03-2015, 12:49 PM (This post was last modified: 08-03-2015 12:58 PM by DLJ.)
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
Well done Nursey. We need more spies on the inside.




Will you give all you can give
So that our banner may advance
Some will fall and some will live
Will you stand up and take your chance?




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08-03-2015, 12:52 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
This could be your thread for just these types of musings. I really look forward to reading more.

And yes, do take notes. Smile

Hug


But as if to knock me down, reality came around
And without so much as a mere touch, cut me into little pieces

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08-03-2015, 12:54 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
I am looking forward to hearing your analyses. Of course, I expect a full bibliography, citations, footnotes and proper use of quotes. Tongue

孤独 - The Out Crowd
Life is a flash of light between two eternities of darkness.
[Image: Schermata%202014-10-24%20alle%2012.39.01.png]
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08-03-2015, 12:55 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
(08-03-2015 12:49 PM)DLJ Wrote:  Well done Nursey. We need more spies on the inside.

I was so going to post the Mission Impossible theme music along with a Secret Agent Woman gif, but when I went to google that last... dem costumes Ohmy Blush

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08-03-2015, 12:56 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
(08-03-2015 12:25 PM)Nurse Wrote:  Last night I kicked it at the farm. Thought that might be one way for me to yet again skip church on a non-work weekend...I was wrong.

The power of Christ compelled me to go to a southern baptist church this morning - the parental units persuaded me, and for once I ran out of excuses. I tried saying I had no makeup or clothes (mom had a cute dress that fit me and matched my boots, and she had a drawer of extra makeup), the I'll be late if I shower excuse - "that's ok doll, just get there when you can, the first 45 minutes will just be singing, anyway", and she had a blow dryer and curling iron. Then she pulled out te big guns, she told my son "Mommy will meet us at church." Dammit.

Today's sermon was on prayer. Apparently, Father God is not obligated to answer prayers of the unsaved (must be why we atheists don't get heard). My marriage failed because we didn't pray enough. Others are blessed because they pray. Oh, and he only answers prayers if you call him by name, so it's gotta start with Yahweh, Eloheim, Mighty Creator of the Earth and Heavens. When I walked in (I was almost an hour late) the preacher was ranting about fornication and praying for God to take away lustful thoughts.

I'd like to present a fun outline of the sermon, but most of it was just rhetoric spun in circles.

The service closed with a beautiful duet. I actually cried a bit. As I'm sitting there contemplating the theatrics I've just suffered through, these two young people sang with such passion to an acoustic guitar. It made me think about why some religious music is so damn moving. It's not necessarily the words, it's the passion behind it, that glimpse into a person that if not presented in music would be highly intimate and private. At least I think that's it, I'm still trying to figure it out.


I'll be going to church quite a bit over this next year while I pick up my personal pieces and glue myself back together. I'll be at church on Easter for certain. I may start taking notes so I can come back here to vent and analyze. This closet sucks.

I hear I'm going to be asked back to either play for Easter, or sing the baritone solo in the Bethoven "Benedictus" from the Missa Solemnis .. it's really really beautiful. We'll "have 'em weeping" in the isles. I guess they got over my heathenness, (or else they're pretty desperate). Cool

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein God has a plan for us. Please stop screwing it up with your prayers.
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08-03-2015, 01:26 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
(08-03-2015 12:25 PM)Nurse Wrote:  I tried saying I had no makeup or clothes...

The story started out well and then through a cruel twist of fate ended up in church.

Damn you God!!!!

Rolleyes

"I feel as though the camera is almost a kind of voyeur in Mr. Beans life, and you just watch this bizarre man going about his life in the way that he wants to."

-Rowan Atkinson
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08-03-2015, 01:26 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
(08-03-2015 12:56 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  ...
I guess they got over my heathenness, (or else they're pretty desperate). Cool

Or both?

Consider

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08-03-2015, 02:12 PM
RE: The Adventures of Nurse in Church
This is all I got...

[Image: polar-bear-hug-540x405.jpg]

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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