The Depression/Anxiety Thread
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03-07-2012, 04:01 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
(03-07-2012 08:25 AM)bemore Wrote:  



Thats a great new signature Bemore; adding it to my quotes and affirmations list. Thumbsup
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03-07-2012, 04:07 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
(01-07-2012 09:51 PM)Anjele Wrote:  Bad, really blue day for me today. BLAH

Between trying to find a decent job and having to cancel our vacation due to wildfires, I have just bottomed out.


The only (sort of good) things about those really bad days is that you can reflect on past better ones, and await their return....................... Tongue
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06-07-2012, 07:13 AM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
I know I should have read all four pages, but I wanted to post before I went to work Confused

I have bipolar II, which in many cases is heavy on the depression end and patients exhibit hypomania (in some sense it's less than mania, which would classify one as bipolar I)

I have recently cofounded a site for mental health advocacy,
http://www.ihaveamentalillness.com
I have an FAQ on the site that I'm currently working on. I'm trying to answer questions for the curious and the mentally ill who are unsure of things. Not that my opinions are always right... though I wish they were... but I do my best.

Cheers!
opera

Operatic Baritone + Not Terribly Good Composer
http://www.soundcloud.com/archangelassociate

Mathematician and Computer Scientist working in compilers
http://www.rosecompiler.org

Advocate for the mentally ill, and I have bipolar II
ihaveamentalillness.com
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08-07-2012, 04:39 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
bemore are you feeling better by now?

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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10-07-2012, 08:59 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
I think I'm stuck within the whole stigma of my having Tourette Syndrome. It took a long while to understand I had a neurological disorder. I went from being labelled as being under a religious psychosis ('when Armageddon comes, everything will be better' talk got me that one) to not responding to any medication, to then being off medication and then having anxiety and panic attacks at least one a week and then getting it narrowed down. I guess it's because I went through the Full Monty when it comes to mental illness and then a neurological one to boot.

I think the worst card dealt to me was my parents still talked to me because I had it. It's not 'I talk to you because you're my child, and I love you' but 'I want to make sure you're still alive and that's all'.

Those relationships ended a little while ago. I don't feel any different, which isn't what I expected. I guess it was because it was a long goodbye.

Depression hits me some days, other days it doesn't. I find the more active I am, the less chance I have of spending time in my own head. Sometimes life does get boring, and I can be my worst enemy in getting myself into situations where I really crumble. The worst thing I think I still do is pay attention to my own bullshit.

I'm not writing this to give any pointers, just saying in my own way that it's okay, even if I'm still stuck in my mind and have to constantly readjust my views on how I think of myself.

CTS
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10-07-2012, 09:23 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
(10-07-2012 08:59 PM)cheapthrillseaker Wrote:  I think I'm stuck within the whole stigma of my having Tourette Syndrome. It took a long while to understand I had a neurological disorder. I went from being labelled as being under a religious psychosis ('when Armageddon comes, everything will be better' talk got me that one) to not responding to any medication, to then being off medication and then having anxiety and panic attacks at least one a week and then getting it narrowed down. I guess it's because I went through the Full Monty when it comes to mental illness and then a neurological one to boot.

I think the worst card dealt to me was my parents still talked to me because I had it. It's not 'I talk to you because you're my child, and I love you' but 'I want to make sure you're still alive and that's all'.

Those relationships ended a little while ago. I don't feel any different, which isn't what I expected. I guess it was because it was a long goodbye.

Depression hits me some days, other days it doesn't. I find the more active I am, the less chance I have of spending time in my own head. Sometimes life does get boring, and I can be my worst enemy in getting myself into situations where I really crumble. The worst thing I think I still do is pay attention to my own bullshit.

I'm not writing this to give any pointers, just saying in my own way that it's okay, even if I'm still stuck in my mind and have to constantly readjust my views on how I think of myself.

CTS



I think Tourette Syndrome is probably preferable to"talking in tongues."

As for depression, wherever possible, I have found that keeping active and amused is a helpful ploy.

Good luck in overcoming your problems; you appear to have a good attitude. Thumbsup
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10-07-2012, 09:28 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
CTS,
Does your Tourettes manifest with the foul language tic? I'd love to see you go to church and shock the old blue hairs when you blurt out a few "Fuck You, Shithole!s"
Big Grin

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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10-07-2012, 10:09 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
No public verbal tics. At least, not yet. Unless you counted the ones locked up in my head head for two years straight before I left Kingdom Halls. Big Grin I have got the occasional snapping of my fingers for no fucking reason as an outside tic, but so far that's considered okay, even in libraries.

Thanks Mr Woof! It took a lot of time to get the good attitude, but it's worth it.

CTS
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10-07-2012, 10:11 PM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
(03-07-2012 04:01 PM)Mr Woof Wrote:  
(03-07-2012 08:25 AM)bemore Wrote:  



Thats a great new signature Bemore; adding it to my quotes and affirmations list. Thumbsup
Whatever you do Mr Woof........ dont google it........ ha ha Smile

For no matter how much I use these symbols, to describe symptoms of my existence.
You are your own emphasis.
So I say nothing.

-Bemore.
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11-07-2012, 02:21 AM
RE: The Depression/Anxiety Thread
Its quite funny in a non funny manic depressive way how I spend so much time on this forum.... because of all the great people on here..... and I am aware of this thread yet I dont really use it......... when in reality this last month I should have Sad

Id had the worst bout of my depression starting last year where I was off work from last October to January this year.... with help and support from family and friends I began to pick myself up and life started to look good again. I resolved to not let myself get in such a state again so I wrote down the things that I knew to look out for...... what I called the "warning signs"

Things were cool......... I met a girl when I wasnt actually looking for a girlfriend and things started to really pick up for me...... for a short time.

We finished with each other about a month ago and although I didnt actually have any feelings for her....... I was still a bit saddened, and I slowly started to slip...... all the whilst telling myself I could cope....... I started to see some of the "warning signs" and I havent done anything about it...... the only thing I have done is to smoke shit loads of weed....... which I know I am abusing and using as an escape and when Im smoking that much it does me more harm than good.

I only work four days a week (tues-friday) and last monday (2nd july) I had been up all night smoking and when it came time to go to work I convinced myself that It would be ok to ring in sick but only for one day (even though my judgement was screaming at me not to) so I did...... and ive not been back since Sad

I have told them that I had food poisoning and that it has aggraveted my Irritable bowel syndrome (I hate lying to them) because I couldnt face going through all of the shit again....... that is telling them that im depressed and that I cannot cope....... caus I hate it, I dont want to be seen as this weak burdensome person Sad

I know if I dont tell anybody then they cant help me........... but in the past ive told the relevant people and all they do is offer me anti-depressants which I refuse to take on the ground that I watched my mum be a zombie on them all my life and she still killed herself...... and it isnt dealing with my issues....... its just giving me more drugs that are gonna fuck with my serotonin levels.

I abuse drugs to cover up the cracks......... I have taken the anti-ds before and it feels exactly the same Sad

So ive resolved myself to go back to work tommorow..... the thing is I know that there not gonna be bothered ive been off (my supervisors) and they are genuine people who do actually care and will be glad to see me back..... the thing is though I work for my local authority/council/state and I know that they are clamping down on people with sick time........ and although I have had no official warnings from my employees it is something that does worry me a hell of a lot and its worry that I dont need.

The best way I can describe myself is like this........

[Image: images?q=tbn:ANd9GcT3-rbCU6yGjX8b0FkwIqS...IiSgBh47VQ]

...... with my head in the sand just waiting for my problems to go away. Whilst my head is in the sand though with nothing to occupy it it just fill up with worthless and negative thoughts about myself.

It just feels like a fucking never ending cycle........ I know within me is the strength and the power to deal with this shit....... im really fucking struggling to find it right now though Sad

For no matter how much I use these symbols, to describe symptoms of my existence.
You are your own emphasis.
So I say nothing.

-Bemore.
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