The Empathy Booth.
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08-05-2013, 11:25 AM
The Empathy Booth.
I am creating this thread because I just need to share stuff that I'd normally would put in maybe the whispering thread but that thread isn't protected by the fluffy purple colour of this section. I don't really need help or even support, but I just need to put it out there. Maybe others need a place, too, in the future, so they can share here if they like.







Today: I am trying not to lose it. Tomorrow is my deceased best friends would-be 30th birthday. Something great is happening in our community, she is getting a facility named after her in a line of work that she dedicated her too-short life to. The last few months others and myself have been working hard at creating logos, plaques and the event of the grand opening tomorrow (scheduled purposefully on her birthdate). Everyone is happy, excited and proud of her, and they should be. This is a good thing. And I hate it. I hate every moment of it. I don't want it to happen, I don't want to be there and I don't want to accept it. I am talking positive, I want to be positive because that's who I am, usually. But I am bursting at the seams with sadness and anger. I want to go on the vacation we talked about doing when we turn thirty. I want to walk on a beach with her, holding her hand. I want to drink bellinis and laugh. I hope I can pull it together tomorrow, especially for her parents who are the best people ever. I've tried to leave the house twice today to run errands but end up a puddled mess. I feel like I'm suffocating. I need the weekend badly. It's supposed to be nice and I want to walk in the sun and breath the fresh air.
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08-05-2013, 11:30 AM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
Wow, LJ, I feel the pain in your writing.

I don't know them but I suspect that her parents might be feeling the same and a damburst of emotion from you on the day would only be seen, and appreciated, as an expression of love.

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08-05-2013, 11:45 AM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
As most of you know, I'm going through a bulimia/self-mutilation recovery and still very much tempted.
Well, I'm scared.
My boyfriend is one of the people that is really helping me right now and he is leaving for a 3 month, Marines basic training in 1 month and 11 days.
I'm worried that I might do something stupid or get so upset that I give up on my recovery.
-cries-
I seriously don't know what to do.

"You don't disappoint me.... I think your much braver than you may believe."
bemore

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08-05-2013, 12:12 PM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
(08-05-2013 11:25 AM)LadyJane Wrote:  I am creating this thread because I just need to share stuff that I'd normally would put in maybe the whispering thread but that thread isn't protected by the fluffy purple colour of this section. I don't really need help or even support, but I just need to put it out there. Maybe others need a place, too, in the future, so they can share here if they like.







Today: I am trying not to lose it. Tomorrow is my deceased best friends would-be 30th birthday. Something great is happening in our community, she is getting a facility named after her in a line of work that she dedicated her too-short life to. The last few months others and myself have been working hard at creating logos, plaques and the event of the grand opening tomorrow (scheduled purposefully on her birthdate). Everyone is happy, excited and proud of her, and they should be. This is a good thing. And I hate it. I hate every moment of it. I don't want it to happen, I don't want to be there and I don't want to accept it. I am talking positive, I want to be positive because that's who I am, usually. But I am bursting at the seams with sadness and anger. I want to go on the vacation we talked about doing when we turn thirty. I want to walk on a beach with her, holding her hand. I want to drink bellinis and laugh. I hope I can pull it together tomorrow, especially for her parents who are the best people ever. I've tried to leave the house twice today to run errands but end up a puddled mess. I feel like I'm suffocating. I need the weekend badly. It's supposed to be nice and I want to walk in the sun and breath the fresh air.

Oh Jane, I know that feeling all too well!

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Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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08-05-2013, 12:15 PM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
Lady Jane...take a breath, take several. When you feel like something is triggering too much, change gears. One foot and then the other. I know this will mean a lot to your friend's parents. Though it seems like it's endless...this will be over in a couple days.

So you choke up...it's kind of expected when someone is really important to you. Breathe, hide and scream, cry, swear, laugh...not saying it will be easy, but you can get through thins.

Hugs and strength sent your way.
A

See here they are, the bruises, some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

“Stab the body and it heals, but injure the heart and the wound lasts a lifetime.”
― Mineko Iwasaki
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08-05-2013, 12:17 PM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
**Legend**
With all respect...this isn't about you right now.

Lady needs some support. She never asks for any, we owe it to her for all the support she gives.

See here they are, the bruises, some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF

“Stab the body and it heals, but injure the heart and the wound lasts a lifetime.”
― Mineko Iwasaki
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08-05-2013, 02:22 PM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
Hey LJ,

Take this one moment at a time, even one second at a time if you have to. You are strong and this is a very big thing you are experiencing. Keep focused on your well-being and thank you for telling us. I hold you in high esteem for what you're doing, and sympathize for you as you go through with it.

Hug

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08-05-2013, 04:00 PM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
Will be thinking of you tomorrow. Sorry Sad I hate death stuff. People feel shit but you can't say anything remotely helpful...

Remember her, love her...
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08-05-2013, 04:38 PM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
It's hard Lady J. It seems unbelievable that some things keep happening - keep going on, while others just stop. It's like being forced to live in some surreal space where time is spent just continually reevaluating expectations and results and wishes. And you make it through the day. It's tough but you do it.

As DLJ said, there will be nothing inappropriate about any emotional expression concerning the loss of your friend. Love will help put unused memories into greater perspective.

The only time your friend's life will be completely gone, is when you are. Don't miss the chance to be there, to help people know about your loved one and how greatly she will always be missed.

Heart

I think in the end, I just feel like I'm a secular person who has a skeptical eye toward any extraordinary claim, carefully examining any extraordinary evidence before jumping to conclusions. ~ Eric ~ My friend ... who figured it out.
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08-05-2013, 05:01 PM
RE: The Empathy Booth.
(08-05-2013 11:45 AM)legendoflink Wrote:  As most of you know, I'm going through a bulimia/self-mutilation recovery and still very much tempted.
Well, I'm scared.
My boyfriend is one of the people that is really helping me right now and he is leaving for a 3 month, Marines basic training in 1 month and 11 days.
I'm worried that I might do something stupid or get so upset that I give up on my recovery.
-cries-
I seriously don't know what to do.

You deserve to fell better Heart, and you can achieve this without hurting yourself Yes. I know you can! Hug

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