The Jesus Shakedown
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02-05-2016, 07:32 AM
The Jesus Shakedown
It occurs to me -- Christianity is exactly like the mafia asking for "protection money".


This god fella (The Don) sends his son (the enforcer) and says you have to believe in him (pay him off) -- or else you'll go to hell (or break your knees)...

At least with the mafioso -- they'll only come by once a month...............

And you don't have to put up with their bullshit forever....

.......................................

The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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02-05-2016, 07:49 AM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
That's interesting.
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02-05-2016, 07:59 AM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
(02-05-2016 07:32 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  It occurs to me -- Christianity is exactly like the mafia asking for "protection money".


This god fella (The Don) sends his son (the enforcer) and says you have to believe in him (pay him off) -- or else you'll go to hell (or break your knees)...

At least with the mafioso -- they'll only come by once a month...............

And you don't have to put up with their bullshit forever....

I don't know if prostitution is the oldest profession. Tribalism and threats for controlling people is probably the oldest profession.

Gods derive their power from post-hoc rationalizations. -The Inquisition

Using the supernatural to explain events in your life is a failure of the intellect to comprehend the world around you. -The Inquisition
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02-05-2016, 11:53 AM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
(02-05-2016 07:59 AM)TheInquisition Wrote:  
(02-05-2016 07:32 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  It occurs to me -- Christianity is exactly like the mafia asking for "protection money".


This god fella (The Don) sends his son (the enforcer) and says you have to believe in him (pay him off) -- or else you'll go to hell (or break your knees)...

At least with the mafioso -- they'll only come by once a month...............

And you don't have to put up with their bullshit forever....

I don't know if prostitution is the oldest profession. Tribalism and threats for controlling people is probably the oldest profession.

I would have guessed that "bushman" or "forager" was the oldest profession.

.... unless you have to actually get PAID for it to be a profession. Hmm. Then we'd have to look at what was in play when money got invented... and also what counts as money? Is it really cash if it's a lump of clay that can be redeemed for a jug of grain? If so.... the oldest profession is probably "farmer", since they would have been the first ones paid.

"If I ignore the alternatives, the only option is God; I ignore them; therefore God." -- The Syllogism of Fail
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02-05-2016, 12:28 PM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
(02-05-2016 07:32 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  It occurs to me -- Christianity is exactly like the mafia asking for "protection money".


This god fella (The Don) sends his son (the enforcer) and says you have to believe in him (pay him off) -- or else you'll go to hell (or break your knees)...

At least with the mafioso -- they'll only come by once a month...............

And you don't have to put up with their bullshit forever....

With the Catholic church at least, the "payoff" goes beyond metaphor and becomes literal. Salvation is obtained only through the church (this is explicit in their teaching), and you are heavily pressured to give money to the church (even though they are already unbelievably rich -- and do not pay taxes). So if you don't pay up -- literally -- you're going to hell.
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02-05-2016, 12:38 PM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
If Yahweh was real he'd be the ultimate mob boss, you have to gain his favor or be punished for it for no real reason but he's powerful.

This reminds me of the modern practice of Evangelicals who ask their followers to send money as a "seed" offering so that God will grow that money into more money and maybe even cure a disease they have or make sure Timmy get's into Harvard. Later on they just send them more letters asking for more money seeds and get rich and the people who sent it in stay poor or get more sick.

At least with the actual mob if you pay them you do get protection and other incentives, with God you just get jerk con artists who take the money and buy lavish homes and private jets and you get nothing in return but an empty bank account. It's funny how theists try to make atheists look bad and immoral for not believing, we're not the ones promising salvation or magical favors for your hard earned money.

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02-05-2016, 01:31 PM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
(02-05-2016 07:32 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  It occurs to me -- Christianity is exactly like the mafia asking for "protection money".


This god fella (The Don) sends his son (the enforcer) and says you have to believe in him (pay him off) -- or else you'll go to hell (or break your knees)...

At least with the mafioso -- they'll only come by once a month...............

And you don't have to put up with their bullshit forever....

Yeah, but the Mafia actually does break legs... God just threatens to do stuff to you after you're dead.
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02-05-2016, 01:56 PM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
Excellent analogy but all religions are basically the same.

Atheism is NOT a Religion. It's A Personal Relationship With Reality!
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02-05-2016, 02:32 PM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
(02-05-2016 07:32 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  It occurs to me -- Christianity is exactly like the mafia asking for "protection money".


This god fella (The Don) sends his son (the enforcer) and says you have to believe in him (pay him off) -- or else you'll go to hell (or break your knees)...

At least with the mafioso -- they'll only come by once a month...............

And you don't have to put up with their bullshit forever....

Well you see, in context, this is perfect love. Perfection is watching over you forever, knowing your thoughts, judging them, and discarding you if you don't fit the bill. Seems fair. Dodgy

This garbage can't be believed by a thinking person. I really think that most christians just don't think about what they are saying.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
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02-05-2016, 02:36 PM
RE: The Jesus Shakedown
Yes, he is a mafia boss.







"Skepticism is the first step towards truth" -Denis Diderot
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