The Journey of Disbelief
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07-02-2012, 02:20 AM
The Journey of Disbelief
So, I've seen some threads about people's personal stories of why they don't believe in God, Gods, Sky Cake, or the Flying Sgetti Monster. Yes, that's how I spell Sgetti, have so since I was a kid.

Anyway, I would like to share mine, although it's probably not that interesting. See, while my family was religious, they weren't that religious. So I probably got it pretty lenient compared to most.

In many ways, I have my mother to thank for my non-belief. While she believed herself, she always encouraged my innate curiosity. And I was too, curious about everything. I wanted to know why things worked the way the did, how we figured out everything we use in the world today when just a couple of hundred years ago we barely figured out the steam engine. The universe fascinated me.

Mind you, back then, I believed in god. I thought "wow, god made all this? Sweet!"

Of course, like most theists, I hadn't read the bible yet. It wasn't until I was about 12 years old that I started getting interested in philosophy and myth. I had an obsession with Atlantis, and for a time (I'm almost sorry to say) was convinced that the stories of Atlantis and the stories of Eden were about the same place.

So I thought, well, if that's the case then the Bible should say where Atlantis is, or at least mention it. At which point I *horror movie drum roll* read it.

Almost immediately things started to not make sense. Light without a source? Talking snakes? Why, this wasn't history, this sounded more like all those other myths I've read about. So I did the only thing I could think to do, I asked our pastor...



...and got kicked out of the church. That's right, at the age of 12, because I went "Huh?" I got kicked out of the church.

That was the first crack in the armor for me, and it got worse. I went to other churches, friends churches, youth groups (Young Life, Young Faith was popular at our school) and one after the other, they all decided I was hopeless. Heathen, Devil Worshiper, Lost Soul, these were the "Words of Gods Love" I began to hear from then on. And although I didn't put what I was thinking into actual words until much later, that was the first time I thought "Why are these disciples of gods love... so vile...?"

And that's pretty much it. I still study the bible, but not from a religious point of view. It's a philosophy, a myth, something to be understood so that you can understand the minds of those who follow it, but not something to be worshiped. Is there a god? Well, I don't know, but I see absolutely nothing to convince me there is, and the universe seems to carry on just fine without him.

And that's my story.
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07-02-2012, 06:33 AM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
Kudos for discovering reason so young. I've always been prone to flights of fancy, only more recently now I'm the one piloting. Great story, thanks for sharing.

Drinking Beverage Grab a cuppa' joe; sit-n-read my blog for a spell: www.vaweber.wordpress.com
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07-02-2012, 09:34 AM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
(07-02-2012 02:20 AM)The Outcast Wrote:  So, I've seen some threads about people's personal stories of why they don't believe in God, Gods, Sky Cake, or the Flying Sgetti Monster. Yes, that's how I spell Sgetti, have so since I was a kid.

Anyway, I would like to share mine, although it's probably not that interesting. See, while my family was religious, they weren't that religious. So I probably got it pretty lenient compared to most.

In many ways, I have my mother to thank for my non-belief. While she believed herself, she always encouraged my innate curiosity. And I was too, curious about everything. I wanted to know why things worked the way the did, how we figured out everything we use in the world today when just a couple of hundred years ago we barely figured out the steam engine. The universe fascinated me.

Mind you, back then, I believed in god. I thought "wow, god made all this? Sweet!"

Of course, like most theists, I hadn't read the bible yet. It wasn't until I was about 12 years old that I started getting interested in philosophy and myth. I had an obsession with Atlantis, and for a time (I'm almost sorry to say) was convinced that the stories of Atlantis and the stories of Eden were about the same place.

So I thought, well, if that's the case then the Bible should say where Atlantis is, or at least mention it. At which point I *horror movie drum roll* read it.

Almost immediately things started to not make sense. Light without a source? Talking snakes? Why, this wasn't history, this sounded more like all those other myths I've read about. So I did the only thing I could think to do, I asked our pastor...



...and got kicked out of the church. That's right, at the age of 12, because I went "Huh?" I got kicked out of the church.

That was the first crack in the armor for me, and it got worse. I went to other churches, friends churches, youth groups (Young Life, Young Faith was popular at our school) and one after the other, they all decided I was hopeless. Heathen, Devil Worshiper, Lost Soul, these were the "Words of Gods Love" I began to hear from then on. And although I didn't put what I was thinking into actual words until much later, that was the first time I thought "Why are these disciples of gods love... so vile...?"

And that's pretty much it. I still study the bible, but not from a religious point of view. It's a philosophy, a myth, something to be understood so that you can understand the minds of those who follow it, but not something to be worshiped. Is there a god? Well, I don't know, but I see absolutely nothing to convince me there is, and the universe seems to carry on just fine without him.

And that's my story.

I'm sorry you had to go through the judgment and rejection that you experienced. You're certainly not an "Outcast" here in our eyes. What that pastor meant for harm actually did you good by showing you how untenable belief in the Bible really is. Welcome to our little community and thank you for sharing your story!

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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07-02-2012, 01:59 PM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
Well, like I said, I probably had it pretty easy. I went to one of those "Reformed Community Churches" which were kind of like Christianity on Valiums.

One bit of irony I remember thinking about. Our church was called the Morningstar Community Church. And, well, Satan was called the Morningstar. So was Jesus, who they were probably actually referring too, but it was still funny to me.

And you know... I kinda like being "The Outcast." In a sense I feel like being pushed out of a religious life, and eventually just turning around and walking away from it myself, puts me in a unique position to study it. And why study it? Well I could be cliched and say "know your enemy" but I don't see religion as the enemy. I do like to understand why they think what they think though.
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07-02-2012, 11:38 PM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
welcome to TTA
Have an insightful stay

Observer

Agnostic atheist
Secular humanist
Emotional rationalist
Disclaimer: Don’t mix the personal opinion above with the absolute and objective truth. Remember to think for yourself. Thank you.
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08-02-2012, 04:15 AM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
(07-02-2012 01:59 PM)The Outcast Wrote:  One bit of irony I remember thinking about. Our church was called the Morningstar Community Church. And, well, Satan was called the Morningstar. So was Jesus, who they were probably actually referring too, but it was still funny to me.
Satan was not called Morningstar but one of the sources that fed the myth of a real satan is a story about the Morningstar and also a story about a falling star, but hey that was very close. Respect that you know of it at all! Smile

And of course, welcome to the forum *offering a star shaped cookie*

cheers

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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08-02-2012, 05:26 AM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
Hmm, I thought he was. Or was it Dawnstar? Honestly it's been a while since I looked into it, and only recently have I started studying it again because of this sudden resurgence of people trying to "Save my soul."

I keep telling them it's already gone, I sold it for a cookie. It was a very good cookie, white chocolate macadamia nut. But they don't listen, or they just give you this really strange look...
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08-02-2012, 06:20 AM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
The whole "satan" and "satanism" thing is very complicated because it is not only stories in the bible that play a part in it, there are lots of myths and misinterpretations that play a big part and after a while it was so twisted and changed that by now it is really difficult to find out the "truth" how it started etc, but as I said it was really close anyway Smile

lol it's fun I did something similar like with the sold for a cookie once.
A person on the street felt the need to preach to me (approached me while i was just sitting there having icecream). "Do you know Jesus?" And I am like "yeah but I'd rather following the teachings of the dark lord" weird look from Jesusperson "you know Satan?"
Tried to keep babbling about Jesus but I kept having my ice and soon that person was gone Big Grin

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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08-02-2012, 09:15 AM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
Sorry Leela, Morning star can be a Biblical term for Lucifer.

In Isaiah 14:12-15 Lucifer is called the son of the morning and "lucier" means (according to Strong's Concordance) 1966 heylel hay-lale' from (in the sense of brightness); the morning-star:--lucifer. The Morning Star is the patron of Babylon who experienced a fall from the skies.

A more vague reference is Job 38: 7 "When the morning stars sang together, and all the sons of God shouted for joy?" The thought being morning stars being linked to sons of God could be an Angelic connection.

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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08-02-2012, 09:19 AM
RE: The Journey of Disbelief
Well... "Lucifer" is actually Latin for "Morning Star" or "Light-Bringer." It's just that Christians feel uncomfortable every time the Bible calls Satan by what they think is Jesus' nickname, so they come up with convoluted explanations. "Well it just means that he was a star of the morning, not THE Morningstar."

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

"We see you cry. We turn your head. Then we slap your face. We see you try. We see you fail. Some things never change."
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