The Official Crying Thread
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28-11-2015, 11:00 AM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
(28-11-2015 09:22 AM)jennybee Wrote:  
(28-11-2015 09:20 AM)Escape Artist Wrote:  This Thanksgiving was very hard. It felt like we were all playing a game of "Let's distract ourselves from the fact that dad's gone" - we went out to eat with my dad's mother and his brother this last weekend, which is something we'd have never done before, and then for the actual holiday, my mom and brother drove out to Missouri to do a bit of sight-seeing that my brother's been wanting to do for ages. Rev and I just stayed here at the apartment and had a quiet, slightly non-traditional Thanksgiving meal. The kids were at their dad's house.

It's stupid, though. I always hated Thanksgiving. I've had (and continue to deal with, though I'm working through them with Rev's help) food issues and Thanksgiving is all about food, so I would dread it every year. Combine those food issues with social anxiety and it just made it all that worse. My mom and brother and I would bitch about having to go and make nice with people. My mom does not like to cook and so hated all the prep for Thanksgiving and my brother had his own food issues and the three of us are not the most sociable. My dad would get onto us and tell us to stop our sniveling Smile and just enjoy the day.

He wasn't there to tell us to stop being Scrooges this year and he never will be again. I cried off and on all day and felt so stupid about it because as I said I've never cared for Thanksgiving at all. I can only imagine how bad Christmas is going to be. I am ready for the holidays to be done and over with.

I felt a bit better yesterday and am hoping that today is even better. Keeping busy seems to be the best remedy. What am I thankful for this year? That Thanksgiving is over. Undecided

Hug
Hug
EA, it appears the only good thing about thanksgiving was your dad being the glue to make it bearable. I'd be surprised if you were not sad this first year and any other time for that matter. There is no schedule for grief or grieving. Holidays are hard we keep getting these reminders of who we are missing, memories of some good times.
Sometimes I'd just like to go away to a sunny beach but I know the brain will not let it alone.
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28-11-2015, 11:01 AM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
(28-11-2015 09:20 AM)Escape Artist Wrote:  This Thanksgiving was very hard. It felt like we were all playing a game of "Let's distract ourselves from the fact that dad's gone" - we went out to eat with my dad's mother and his brother this last weekend, which is something we'd have never done before, and then for the actual holiday, my mom and brother drove out to Missouri to do a bit of sight-seeing that my brother's been wanting to do for ages. Rev and I just stayed here at the apartment and had a quiet, slightly non-traditional Thanksgiving meal. The kids were at their dad's house.

It's stupid, though. I always hated Thanksgiving. I've had (and continue to deal with, though I'm working through them with Rev's help) food issues and Thanksgiving is all about food, so I would dread it every year. Combine those food issues with social anxiety and it just made it all that worse. My mom and brother and I would bitch about having to go and make nice with people. My mom does not like to cook and so hated all the prep for Thanksgiving and my brother had his own food issues and the three of us are not the most sociable. My dad would get onto us and tell us to stop our sniveling Smile and just enjoy the day.

He wasn't there to tell us to stop being Scrooges this year and he never will be again. I cried off and on all day and felt so stupid about it because as I said I've never cared for Thanksgiving at all. I can only imagine how bad Christmas is going to be. I am ready for the holidays to be done and over with.

I felt a bit better yesterday and am hoping that today is even better. Keeping busy seems to be the best remedy. What am I thankful for this year? That Thanksgiving is over. Undecided
(T_T)

It will take time but it will get more easy as time go by.

*Bear hug*
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24-01-2016, 10:23 PM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
I made a mistake and visited a certain Facebook page...breaks my heart to go there. But there are also many pictures of my granddaughter and my daughter when she was in good shape and clean.

Tuesday it will be five years since my younger daughter's best friend was murdered. My daughter has never recovered from the loss. I miss Tori...she was such a stabilizing force in my daughter's life.

Her daughter and my granddaughter were like two peas in a pod...now they never see each other.

She was 28 when she died...she left five kids behind...and many friends who feel the empty spot that she left in our hearts.

Five years and it still doesn't seem real...it feels like a bad dream we will wake up from and things will be back to normal. But it's not a bad dream...it's a wound that won't heal.

Crap...just crap. I hate it so much.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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24-01-2016, 10:36 PM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
Hug
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24-01-2016, 11:33 PM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
(24-01-2016 10:23 PM)Anjele Wrote:  I made a mistake and visited a certain Facebook page...breaks my heart to go there. But there are also many pictures of my granddaughter and my daughter when she was in good shape and clean.

Tuesday it will be five years since my younger daughter's best friend was murdered. My daughter has never recovered from the loss. I miss Tori...she was such a stabilizing force in my daughter's life.

Her daughter and my granddaughter were like two peas in a pod...now they never see each other.

She was 28 when she died...she left five kids behind...and many friends who feel the empty spot that she left in our hearts.

Five years and it still doesn't seem real...it feels like a bad dream we will wake up from and things will be back to normal. But it's not a bad dream...it's a wound that won't heal.

Crap...just crap. I hate it so much.

Sad That's so hard. Hug

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If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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25-01-2016, 05:14 AM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
Murder and suicide are the most difficult deaths to recover fromHug
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25-01-2016, 06:48 AM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
(24-01-2016 10:23 PM)Anjele Wrote:  I made a mistake and visited a certain Facebook page...breaks my heart to go there. But there are also many pictures of my granddaughter and my daughter when she was in good shape and clean.

Tuesday it will be five years since my younger daughter's best friend was murdered. My daughter has never recovered from the loss. I miss Tori...she was such a stabilizing force in my daughter's life.

Her daughter and my granddaughter were like two peas in a pod...now they never see each other.

She was 28 when she died...she left five kids behind...and many friends who feel the empty spot that she left in our hearts.

Five years and it still doesn't seem real...it feels like a bad dream we will wake up from and things will be back to normal. But it's not a bad dream...it's a wound that won't heal.

Crap...just crap. I hate it so much.

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25-01-2016, 08:37 PM (This post was last modified: 25-01-2016 09:04 PM by Anjele.)
RE: The Official Crying Thread
Thanks guys...

These two should still be together...

[img][Image: Shawn%20and%20Tori_zpshacbvwnh.jpg][/img]

and so should these two...

[img][Image: Lina%20and%20Z_zpsg3ryxnko.jpg][/img]

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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25-01-2016, 09:38 PM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
(24-01-2016 10:23 PM)Anjele Wrote:  I made a mistake and visited a certain Facebook page...breaks my heart to go there. But there are also many pictures of my granddaughter and my daughter when she was in good shape and clean.

Tuesday it will be five years since my younger daughter's best friend was murdered. My daughter has never recovered from the loss. I miss Tori...she was such a stabilizing force in my daughter's life.

Her daughter and my granddaughter were like two peas in a pod...now they never see each other.

She was 28 when she died...she left five kids behind...and many friends who feel the empty spot that she left in our hearts.

Five years and it still doesn't seem real...it feels like a bad dream we will wake up from and things will be back to normal. But it's not a bad dream...it's a wound that won't heal.

Crap...just crap. I hate it so much.

[Image: giphy.gif]

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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04-02-2016, 08:59 AM
RE: The Official Crying Thread
Chopper died in his sleep early this morning. I am heartbroken. He was only six and a half. I got him ten days before my mastectomies...he has been my Little Dude. I love him so much.

We are taking him to be cremated in a little while. I can't breathe. I am taking his favorite toy along...he love his stuffed hedgehog.

I ache.

[img][Image: Chopper_zpsfpwarspa.jpg][/img]

[img][Image: Chop_zpsch1rec2n.jpg][/img]

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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