The Prophecy Thread
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01-01-2016, 09:44 PM (This post was last modified: 01-01-2016 09:50 PM by Full Circle.)
The Prophecy Thread
Since today is the 1st of the year and I always get a laugh when I look back at how wrong all the prognostications were the year before, I think it would be fun to make a few ourselves.

For the next week or so we all post predictions on whatever and then at the end of the year we take a look back and see what we have.

I’ll start:

1. In the US presidential elections Trump will be the GOP nominee and he will select his daughter Ivanka as his running mate. If one Trump is good for the country, two are better he’ll say.

2. Hillary Clinton will select Bernie as her running mate but Bernie will refuse on moral grounds. Clinton will then be forced to replace him with Jeb Bush who by now has given up on the Republican party.

3. The 2016 winter will go down as the warmest on record, this will be apparent when Polar Bears begin showing up in Manhattan and attacking Wall Street traders.

4. During Bill Cosby’s rape trial he will use the “affluenza” defense. When that doesn’t work he’ll start using the Fat Albert voice to talk his way out of the conviction, it works and the jury finds him not guilty. When asked afterwards how he feels he replies, “Heh, heh, heh”.

5. In response to Obama’s unilateral attempt to curb gun violence, the US will set a new record on gun related deaths in 2016 just to show him how wrong he is.

6. China will begin building islands in the Caribbean as “tourist” destinations. Tensions will build when satellite images show that they are in the shape of Panda bears.

7. During tornado season an entire Babtist congregation in Kansas is sucked away as they try to replicate the “miracle” of praying away an F5 super tornado heading directly at them. Weeks later Bibles are still falling from the sky, some consider this a miracle.

8. The summer Olympics in Rio are disrupted multiple times, not by violence, but by scantilly clad Brazilian beauties streaking through all the venues. It becomes the most watched Olympiad in the history of the games.

9. One of the Forum members wins the lotto and flies all of us to Vegas for a giant TTA get together! Everyone gets their airline tickets in time except for earmuffs, the Ranting Thread is never the same afterwards.

10. By the end of the year Chas hits 40,000 posts and puts him in 2nd place to jennybee’s 42,000

11. Girly get his meds mixed up and has to be taken down by tranquilizer gun when he wins the Boston Marathon wearing only a fundoshi.

12. Rev and Leo declare a draw in the “Last One to Post Wins” thread, but before the thread is closed Zeke sneaks one in and wins it all.

“I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man’s reasoning powers are not above the monkey’s.”~Mark Twain
“Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.”~ Ambrose Bierce
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01-01-2016, 10:57 PM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
Re # 7 : Bucky will produce a hit movie series based on these tragic incidents called Babble-nado 1, 2, and 3. In the series, Bibles fall on, and kill, various celebrities and political figures, the first being Kim Kardashian.

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein God has a plan for us. Please stop screwing it up with your prayers.
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01-01-2016, 11:15 PM (This post was last modified: 01-01-2016 11:23 PM by cactus.)
RE: The Prophecy Thread
Jesus will return...
back to Mexico, on the other side of the 100-ft high wall, because he never got a work visa. President Trump will personally escort him out of the country. Trump's exact words will be "Ya Fiya'd, while making a cobra snake hand gesture." President Trump will then have a baby with Bristol Palin, and Sarah Palin will go on a two-day "mission" trip to Mexico to um... let Jesus enter her (yes, the same Jesus. This guy gets around, let me tell you). 9 months later, she'll give birth to twins and proclaim loudly to all the news outlets that it was immaculate conception. Sarah will tragically pass away about 3 days after giving birth. Pope Francis will then recognize the birth of her two babies as two distinct miraculous events, revoke Mother Teresa's sainthood status, and give it to Sarah instead.

If we came from dust, then why is there still dust?
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01-01-2016, 11:58 PM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
Quote:9. One of the Forum members wins the lotto and flies all of us to Vegas for a giant TTA get together! Everyone gets their airline tickets in time except for earmuffs, the Ranting Thread is never the same afterwards.

Well if you just paid for everyone to go to Vegas and you yourself don't get your ticket and missed your event you'd be pissed too.
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02-01-2016, 12:00 AM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
Donald Trump's hair will be declared a toxic dump site.

Thumbsup

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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02-01-2016, 12:08 AM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
(01-01-2016 10:57 PM)Bucky Ball Wrote:  Re # 7 : Bucky will produce a hit movie series based on these tragic incidents called Babble-nado 1, 2, and 3. In the series, Bibles fall on, and kill, various celebrities and political figures, the first being Kim Kardashian.

Do the Bibles fall out of the sky from an upper level weather disturbance or does someone drop them off of a tall building. If it's the tall building scenario I'd like to volunteer the Kim Kardashian drop. Yes

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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02-01-2016, 06:38 AM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
Miley Cyrus will OD.
Muslims will cut off someone's head.
Christians will try to get their bullshit religion taught as science.
The sun will continue to slowly suck in the Earth.
Jesus will finally return.
Arsenal wins the EPL. Laughat

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02-01-2016, 07:01 AM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
I think the Polar bears should attack the Koch brothers and coal and oil CEOS.

Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37
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02-01-2016, 07:04 AM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
(02-01-2016 12:00 AM)dancefortwo Wrote:  Donald Trump's hair will be declared a toxic dump site.

Thumbsup

That's not fair, I was drinking my morning coffee and you made me choke, you almost killed me.

Meh, with all the cutting of government funding the GOP would defund it.

Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37
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02-01-2016, 12:15 PM
RE: The Prophecy Thread
Surely I tell thee, the moon shall drift 3.78 centimeters farther away from us within the span of 365.25 days. When thou see-eth these events unfold, as I have foretold to thee, thou shalt know that I am the Lord thy God, and thou shalt kneeleth before mine feet in awestruck reverence.

If we came from dust, then why is there still dust?
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