The Wife
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27-07-2015, 09:17 AM
The Wife
I hinted towards my wife a few months ago that I don't really know that I believe in god anymore and she immediately said, if that's the case then our relationship is over. I rebounded by saying that I do believe but I'm just going through a period of doubt. We have been together for seven years and we have a son together along with my step daughter. Her parents are very devout xians and love me because of my knowledge of the bible, history of involvement in ministry etc. We don't go to church. My wife says now and then that we should start going, but fortunately we never get around to it. I have finally come to the place where I know that religion is bullshit. I don't want to tell my wife, because I know it would destroy our family. Am I crazy to think that since my wife practices her religion vicariously through her parents that I would be safe to keep this in the closet? This is very hard.

(22-08-2015 07:30 PM)Revenant77x Wrote:  It is by will alone I set my brows in motion it is by the conditioner of avocado that the brows acquire volume the skin acquires spots the spots become a warning. It is by will alone I set my brows in motion.
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27-07-2015, 09:23 AM
RE: The Wife
The only problem I would see is how it would impact your children since she may want to raise them xtian.
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27-07-2015, 09:30 AM
RE: The Wife
(27-07-2015 09:23 AM)jennybee Wrote:  The only problem I would see is how it would impact your children since she may want to raise them xtian.
I will make sure they learn not to blindly accept anything but question everything

(22-08-2015 07:30 PM)Revenant77x Wrote:  It is by will alone I set my brows in motion it is by the conditioner of avocado that the brows acquire volume the skin acquires spots the spots become a warning. It is by will alone I set my brows in motion.
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27-07-2015, 09:31 AM
RE: The Wife
(27-07-2015 09:30 AM)Octapulse Wrote:  
(27-07-2015 09:23 AM)jennybee Wrote:  The only problem I would see is how it would impact your children since she may want to raise them xtian.
I will make sure they learn not to blindly accept anything but question everything

Is your wife going to be open to that if you are pretending to be xtian?
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27-07-2015, 09:35 AM
RE: The Wife
My parents both were closet atheists and I was raised catholic, albeit we didn't pray at home or discuss religion. I was taught to think though.

I deconverted around age 10, all by myself, in a heavily catholic environment.

If you choose the closet (may be wise) then just make sure your kids are exposed to science and such. Doesn't have to interfere with what your wife is doing, just added to it...

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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27-07-2015, 10:40 AM
RE: The Wife
Her love for you is clearly conditional. I would be uncomfortable in such a relationship myself.
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27-07-2015, 10:43 AM
RE: The Wife
Yeah, me too, but that is not the case for everybody. We are all different....

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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27-07-2015, 10:50 AM
RE: The Wife
That is rough. There are some things that can make the closet really hard to bear. For example, your in laws indoctrinating your kids and telling them that atheists are going to burn in hell, or telling them that evolution is a hoax. Also, the fact that you can not share who you truly are with your wife and kids. With that said, that may be price you are willing to pay to keep your family together.

The other thing to consider is that your wife may at some point push hard to go to church (for example if someone close to her dies). Would you be willing to go to church? Some of the atheists here do go to church for the sake of family peace...

You are not alone. Many people here are in a similar situation. If you stay in the closet, come here to vent.
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27-07-2015, 11:00 AM
RE: The Wife
(27-07-2015 09:31 AM)jennybee Wrote:  
(27-07-2015 09:30 AM)Octapulse Wrote:  I will make sure they learn not to blindly accept anything but question everything

Is your wife going to be open to that if you are pretending to be xtian?

I don't think she will have a problem with that

(22-08-2015 07:30 PM)Revenant77x Wrote:  It is by will alone I set my brows in motion it is by the conditioner of avocado that the brows acquire volume the skin acquires spots the spots become a warning. It is by will alone I set my brows in motion.
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27-07-2015, 11:04 AM
RE: The Wife
(27-07-2015 10:43 AM)Dom Wrote:  Yeah, me too, but that is not the case for everybody. We are all different....

Of course. That's why I refrained from offering advice on his situation.
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