The old me.
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07-09-2012, 01:43 PM
RE: The old me.
(07-09-2012 08:52 AM)xLegendofLink096x Wrote:  
(07-09-2012 08:51 AM)Vosur Wrote:  Don't take this personal, but what's the reason behind cutting yourself when you're depressed? It seems to me that it makes the situation even worse than it was before.

It's a way for me to take out my anger and frustrations. Like when people get mad they want to hit something. I cut myself.

Really? Because it will definitely give you problems later in life.

I may feel like hitting something, but I don't. Cutting doesn't fix anything, and it will make your life worse. If you want things to get better, I suggest working for it. That means stop cutting.

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07-09-2012, 03:14 PM
RE: The old me.
(07-09-2012 08:56 AM)xLegendofLink096x Wrote:  Another update:
Everyone things start to get better, they eventually get worse. I just never get happier.
Me and the boyfriend are having troubles again and the family is still arguing. Sad

(07-09-2012 01:43 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  
(07-09-2012 08:52 AM)xLegendofLink096x Wrote:  It's a way for me to take out my anger and frustrations. Like when people get mad they want to hit something. I cut myself.

Really? Because it will definitely give you problems later in life.

I may feel like hitting something, but I don't. Cutting doesn't fix anything, and it will make your life worse. If you want things to get better, I suggest working for it. That means stop cutting.

I'm ten years older than you, which means I'm far removed from subservience to my parents, but I've suffered my share of isolation and family problems growing up (and to this very morning even). I wouldn't say I have suffered depression so severely as it sounds like you or many of the folks on this forum do. Take what I have to say with that in mind.


Sixteen is when you first start to have a real grasp of the world, it's promise and its problems. (Well, it seems like mostly problems, doesn't it?) It's when people start really riding your ass to make something of yourself and grasp for independence, but when they still don't let you have any. It's the time when I, for one, felt the most frustrated and caged. And frankly, I had it easy! Sixteen is a hard time if you really crave independence, because you can't have it yet. But if you have courage and faith in yourself, you will get through it and finally be allowed to make your own choices. That's a really important theme for you right now: independence.

From the very little I know about self-harm, people do it because it is one thing they feel they can control and because it releases endorphins that make them feel a little better. I get that. Being trapped, isolated, and unloved...wondering what's so wrong with you. You're right, in that situation, I get the urge to break stuff, like you said. (I have actually gotten so angry in the past month as to really start hitting my stuff...but stuff that's already broken. I don't want to have to deal with the mess of replacing broken shit.) So I guess I'm saying, I think I sympathize. Life throws us shitty times, and we have human reactions.

Logica's right, though, you can't hurt yourself. But telling you to stop is meaningless without something to do instead. How about this? Find something that has the same effects as cutting but doesn't leaving you with scars. You know what is terrible? Running. The only fun thing about running is stopping. If you think you need to suffer, go for a fucking run. Make yourself go a mile and keep running no matter how slow you have to go. You isolate yourself. You can stew in your emotions--hell you can curse your parents out loud; you can pour the need to run away from your family's anger into your legs and lungs; you can punish yourself by going farther, and you know what? It'll feel painful and then it'll feel good. It's something you can control. And most importantly, it will build up your body instead of leaving it scarred. It doesn't have to be running, but it has to be something, and it probably has to be something physical. Find the endeavor you can fuel with the anger, hatred, loneliness, and loss that makes you cut. When you run out of fuel, you'll be better off instead of marred forever.

(Hell, Sunday for me, I tried asking a girl out for the first time in a very long time and was flatly rejected. My body said lie on the couch and feel sorry for yourself, but I said fuck you, I'm going bouldering. Old me would have eaten ice cream.)

And you know why you have to do that? To prove you can be independent. To prove to yourself that you can stand up to the misery that people try to heap on you. Independence is when yourself says "I can't go on" and you say to yourself "fuck you, you're going on because I say so." Independence is going on for yourself and nobody else. Your boyfriend can't save you--and take it from me as a boy, no boy will ever save you--your parents can't save you, only YOU can save you. And you CAN. And you WILL.

Start small. One small thing that is for you, that will make you better, and that will meet your emotional needs. If you can't think of something, try my running suggestion. But do something. You deserve better.
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07-09-2012, 05:05 PM
RE: The old me.
(07-09-2012 03:14 PM)rook2004 Wrote:  
(07-09-2012 08:56 AM)xLegendofLink096x Wrote:  Another update:
Everyone things start to get better, they eventually get worse. I just never get happier.
Me and the boyfriend are having troubles again and the family is still arguing. Sad

(07-09-2012 01:43 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  Really? Because it will definitely give you problems later in life.

I may feel like hitting something, but I don't. Cutting doesn't fix anything, and it will make your life worse. If you want things to get better, I suggest working for it. That means stop cutting.

I'm ten years older than you, which means I'm far removed from subservience to my parents, but I've suffered my share of isolation and family problems growing up (and to this very morning even). I wouldn't say I have suffered depression so severely as it sounds like you or many of the folks on this forum do. Take what I have to say with that in mind.

First of all, age means nothing to me. Second of all, I am fully aware. I have suffered from depression as well. I am not a foreigner to this stuff, keep that in mind.

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07-09-2012, 05:49 PM
RE: The old me.
(07-09-2012 05:05 PM)Logica Humano Wrote:  
(07-09-2012 03:14 PM)rook2004 Wrote:  I'm ten years older than you, which means I'm far removed from subservience to my parents, but I've suffered my share of isolation and family problems growing up (and to this very morning even). I wouldn't say I have suffered depression so severely as it sounds like you or many of the folks on this forum do. Take what I have to say with that in mind.

First of all, age means nothing to me. Second of all, I am fully aware. I have suffered from depression as well. I am not a foreigner to this stuff, keep that in mind.

Sorry, all that was addressed to xLegend, not you.
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08-09-2012, 04:16 AM
RE: The old me.
Why would you quote me then?

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08-09-2012, 04:37 AM
RE: The old me.
This post makes me angry. Family is supposed to be there for you. They are supposed to be the people who accept you and love you no matter what. They are supposed to be the people who make you feel safe in this world. Seeing parents treat their children like this makes me start wanting to install a fascist regime that forces people to take a test before they're allowed to procreate.

Link, many of us are on Skype if you ever want to talk. It's ok to ask for help.

"But the point is, find somebody to love. Everything else is overrated." - HouseofCantor
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08-09-2012, 09:14 AM
RE: The old me.
(08-09-2012 04:37 AM)Smooshmonster Wrote:  This post makes me angry. Family is supposed to be there for you. They are supposed to be the people who accept you and love you no matter what. They are supposed to be the people who make you feel safe in this world. Seeing parents treat their children like this makes me start wanting to install a fascist regime that forces people to take a test before they're allowed to procreate.

Link, many of us are on Skype if you ever want to talk. It's ok to ask for help.

Indeed. If you ever want to talk to a really cool guy, message fstratzero your Skype info. Big Grin

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09-09-2012, 04:13 AM
RE: The old me.
Sure. I'll throw my hat in. You need someone to talk to that won't sugarcoat things? Yo.

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