The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
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18-10-2012, 03:29 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
(18-10-2012 03:26 PM)cheapthrillseaker Wrote:  Cricket bat. More surface area for maximum trauma, is handheld, and small enough to stow in a backpack.

If there's any lesson to be learned from zombie movies, it's that those undead buggers seem to pop up out of nowhere in the blink of an eye. I suggest not stowing your weapon in a backpack.

I prefer a scabbard.

What, no cricket paddle scabbard? Maybe go with a weapon that has a scabbard, or get creative and make a cricket paddle scabbard out of an old cowboy boot or some such. Yeah, I know, not a lot of cowboys in most places that have an abundance of cricket paddles, but you get the picture.

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18-10-2012, 03:39 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
That's another reason for the t-ball bat that I forgot to mention.

They are shorter than your average bat. They can easily be swung in a narrow corridor.

Hmm, and maybe you're right about the spike. I guess one bash could destroy the brain.

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18-10-2012, 03:44 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
I guess how effective a weapon is also comes down to you being able to get a good strike when in a very hectic situation.

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18-10-2012, 04:06 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
I would be more interested in armor than weapons.

Give me enough time with even my bare hands and I can debrain a zombie. But in the apocalypse, there's lots and lots and lots of zombies but still only one of me. Bat, sword, sai, chucks, tonfa, machete, brick, whatever. I'll win those fights over and over.

But all it takes is one bite. One little nibble. On scratch. And then I'm done for, a zombie, and you guys will be trying to bash my brains.

So, fight one zombie, no big deal. Two or three, no big deal. Two or three hundred, very big deal. Probably gonna get scratched. So what I need is armor. Especially for my arms and hands since if I'm doing it right, those are the parts of me that will be closest to the zombies. Good leather gloves and a leather biker's jacket would suffice quite nicely. Collar up and add in a leather aviator cap for the close calls. Leather biker's chaps for the legs, and some decent boots (not cowboy boots, no tread is too slippery after enough blood and brains get splattered around the shopping mall tile floor - hiking boots with good tread).

That's my zombie ensemble.

As for weapons, anything will do. Permanent and reusable, so no guns or flamethrowers or chainsaws or anything else that can run out of ammo or fuel - although once I have my basic all-purpose weapons, I'd still carry guns for their easy point-and-click interface. Light but deadly is key. My first choice is the daisho I have in my livingroom. Katana and wakizashi. Katana for the big open melee and wakizashi for tighter quarters or backup if needed. Good trusty blades, strong but flexible, probably last forever if I don't abuse them by hacking engine blocks or concrete with them. Tanto for emergencies to complete the set. I also have a pair of sai and a pair of tonfa, both pretty good for bashing, but a bit short and not really weighted well for real skull-cracking (zombies are not prone to concussions or unconsciousness like living humans), so I'd leave those home. I might carry a bat, but probably not necessary with the daisho. If I could get my hands on a tetsubo I'd maybe keep that by the front door. I spent some time training in Aikido using a jo, and extended that to a bo from time to time, so I'd keep those around too - I already have one of each. If I were going into town for groceries, I'd take the daisho and the jo and call it good.

If I ever lose those and can't find replacements at WalMart, well, then I'd settle for sporting equipment like aluminum bats or even hockey sticks, or go with your basic machete in a pinch.

"Whores perform the same function as priests, but far more thoroughly." - Robert A. Heinlein
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18-10-2012, 04:28 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
(18-10-2012 04:06 PM)Aseptic Skeptic Wrote:  I would be more interested in armor than weapons.

Give me enough time with even my bare hands and I can debrain a zombie. But in the apocalypse, there's lots and lots and lots of zombies but still only one of me. Bat, sword, sai, chucks, tonfa, machete, brick, whatever. I'll win those fights over and over.

But all it takes is one bite. One little nibble. On scratch. And then I'm done for, a zombie, and you guys will be trying to bash my brains.

So, fight one zombie, no big deal. Two or three, no big deal. Two or three hundred, very big deal. Probably gonna get scratched. So what I need is armor. Especially for my arms and hands since if I'm doing it right, those are the parts of me that will be closest to the zombies. Good leather gloves and a leather biker's jacket would suffice quite nicely. Collar up and add in a leather aviator cap for the close calls. Leather biker's chaps for the legs, and some decent boots (not cowboy boots, no tread is too slippery after enough blood and brains get splattered around the shopping mall tile floor - hiking boots with good tread).

That's my zombie ensemble.

As for weapons, anything will do. Permanent and reusable, so no guns or flamethrowers or chainsaws or anything else that can run out of ammo or fuel - although once I have my basic all-purpose weapons, I'd still carry guns for their easy point-and-click interface. Light but deadly is key. My first choice is the daisho I have in my livingroom. Katana and wakizashi. Katana for the big open melee and wakizashi for tighter quarters or backup if needed. Good trusty blades, strong but flexible, probably last forever if I don't abuse them by hacking engine blocks or concrete with them. Tanto for emergencies to complete the set. I also have a pair of sai and a pair of tonfa, both pretty good for bashing, but a bit short and not really weighted well for real skull-cracking (zombies are not prone to concussions or unconsciousness like living humans), so I'd leave those home. I might carry a bat, but probably not necessary with the daisho. If I could get my hands on a tetsubo I'd maybe keep that by the front door. I spent some time training in Aikido using a jo, and extended that to a bo from time to time, so I'd keep those around too - I already have one of each. If I were going into town for groceries, I'd take the daisho and the jo and call it good.

If I ever lose those and can't find replacements at WalMart, well, then I'd settle for sporting equipment like aluminum bats or even hockey sticks, or go with your basic machete in a pinch.

Go here to see my collection.

You sound like you would appreciate it. I'm kind of a weapon nut and have studied weapons for years.

But yeah, armor is important. I would also look to cover myself in as much Kevlar as possible... just in case I got bit.

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18-10-2012, 04:41 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
(18-10-2012 04:28 PM)kingschosen Wrote:  Go here to see my collection.

You sound like you would appreciate it. I'm kind of a weapon nut and have studied weapons for years.

But yeah, armor is important. I would also look to cover myself in as much Kevlar as possible... just in case I got bit.

Very nice. My favorite is your no-dachi. I don't own one, but that would be in my hands during the zombie apocalypse most of the time if I had one. I would also suggest your butterfly swords for close quarters work. In fact, if I had some, they might top my list above the daisho.

As for kevlar, maybe, but it's hot (so is my leather ensemble). The real issue is that kevlar is great at stopping ballistic impact but not so great at stopping blades - kevlar vest can stop a bullet easily but a knife would get right through. Still, zombies don't use knives much (or guns), so it would probably work well enough against tooth and claw.

Since you seem to have the cash, why not go spider silk and do it right?

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18-10-2012, 04:42 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
[Image: S5730-1000.jpg]
You can keep your silly bats, I will take a war-hammer. Spiked on top so it can be used as a spear, big ole scary hammer for bashing, and a sharp point for either hooking or piercing. It is long enough so I can keep my distance, and it has a loop so I don't loose it.

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18-10-2012, 05:31 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
(18-10-2012 04:42 PM)Dark Light Wrote:  [Image: S5730-1000.jpg]
You can keep your silly bats, I will take a war-hammer. Spiked on top so it can be used as a spear, big ole scary hammer for bashing, and a sharp point for either hooking or piercing. It is long enough so I can keep my distance, and it has a loop so I don't loose it.

Good luck swinging that a couple hundred times.

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18-10-2012, 05:36 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
(18-10-2012 04:42 PM)Dark Light Wrote:  You can keep your silly bats, I will take a war-hammer. Spiked on top so it can be used as a spear, big ole scary hammer for bashing, and a sharp point for either hooking or piercing. It is long enough so I can keep my distance, and it has a loop so I don't loose it.

And with that strap, you can twirl it around super fast and create a windstorm that blows zombies away and hurls lightning bolts at them - but only if you name it Mjolnir.

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18-10-2012, 06:25 PM
RE: The perfect melee weapon against a zombie.
(18-10-2012 05:31 PM)kingschosen Wrote:  
(18-10-2012 04:42 PM)Dark Light Wrote:  [Image: S5730-1000.jpg]
You can keep your silly bats, I will take a war-hammer. Spiked on top so it can be used as a spear, big ole scary hammer for bashing, and a sharp point for either hooking or piercing. It is long enough so I can keep my distance, and it has a loop so I don't loose it.

Good luck swinging that a couple hundred times.

The Zombie Apocalypse is about the only thing that could motivate me to bulk up, but in a post-Zombie world being strong can mean staying alive. I'll do the swinging.

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