The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
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09-10-2012, 11:24 PM
The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
Fill in the blank with a religion or a denomination and provide a belief that is silly, funny and absurd. That would be too broad though. Put on your yarmulke, pope hat, turban or whatever funny piece of religious headgear you can find because the rules for this thread, that I am making up right now, says that it must be considered absurd by most Theists as well. That's right, it must be so nuts that even the those that try everything in their power to rationalize why their religion is right will scoff at the absurdness of it. I figure this is as good a reason as any to learn about religions I am unfamiliar with.
I will start with the denomination that I was raised in.

Most Southern Baptists believe it is wrong to drink alcohol, although they do believe Jesus drank the wine, and turned water into wine for shits and giggles at a party. They even have communion, replacing the wine with grape juice. The way the rationalize this is by saying "Hey, you don't know it was alcoholic wine, therefore it wasn't." Some Southern Baptist churches even have bylaws forbidding it that you must agree to in order to become an official church member.

Now for Catholics. This is one I just recently found out. They believe that when they have communion God is actually, literally transforming the bread and wine into his skin and blood. You would think it would taste worse than it actually does but to them Jesus just taste awfully good. They believe they are magical cannibals of the one true God.

Next...

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09-10-2012, 11:54 PM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
Scientology.

Well.....all of it! Dodgy Fidiots Sad

Humankind Dodgy (a total misnomer)
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10-10-2012, 12:27 AM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
BTW that cannibalism thing .... up it a "power of 10 ridiculous" as in Hebrew culture, drinking blood was an "abomination", and it would have made a Jew of Jesus' day "gag" or vomit. It would be like someone today actually eating sh1t.

1. Exorcisms. If you're out of work they need exorcists. They train then. Not sure how much tuition is ? If you live in Chicago, you will have to move, tho. They got one.

http://www.cbsnews.com/2100-201_162-7048649.html
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/re...MUSBrZr88I
http://rense.com/general3/exors.htm

2. Indulgences.
Buy your way out of hell. http://www.newadvent.org/cathen/07783a.htm

The MOST disgusting thing of all is that the body, (you got it), the REAL remains/bones of St. Therese of Lisieux are carted around the world. ( She's been dead for 100 years! ) http://www.sttherese.com/pilgrim_saint.html

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein Certified Ancient Astronaut Theorist and Levitating yogi, CAAT-LY.
Yeah, for verily I say unto thee, and this we know : Jebus no likey that which doth tickle thee unto thy nether regions.

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10-10-2012, 01:31 AM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
Does exorcism pay well? I can use a better paying job. I can handle puke: clean it up in various ways, scoop it with my hands, command it to leave the room . . .
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10-10-2012, 01:42 AM (This post was last modified: 10-10-2012 01:47 AM by Ozzie.)
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
Here is a gem from the Catholic Church, the Flagellants. These people believe that the only way to show your true devotion to God is to whip yourself until the flesh starts to fall off your back. This movement started out in the Middle Ages, but is still alive and well in Spain, Mexico, Italy, and the most extreme version of it is in the Philippines where people volunteer to be crucified every year, and others volunteer to be whipped by the people in their town as a way to ask God for forgiveness for the town's sins.

[Image: kenawhip.jpg]

As much as I would love to claim that this practice is limited to extreme radical Catholics, the practice is also prevalent in a few extreme sects of Islam. Except the Muslim extremists have more flare and use swords and knives instead of whips.

[Image: Pakistani+Shiite+Muslim+Ashura+self+flagellation.JPG]

Stop the itchy blanket of Creationism from spreading to our classrooms. Say no to Iron Age superstitions Evil_monster
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10-10-2012, 01:49 AM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
Actually there is one silly, absurd thing, that is the DUMBEST DAMN THING I WAS EVER TAUGHT FROM A PULPIT and BELIEVED until I was blank years old.

Did you know boys and girls that males have one less rib than females? Easy to disprove you say. I like my friend needed a visual.

A 38 year old friend of mine came home from university sobbing about this lie she had grown up with. She had a humiliating head bump with her
english professor with whom she argued. He sent her to the anatomy lab.
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10-10-2012, 01:59 AM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
(10-10-2012 01:49 AM)depat Wrote:  Actually there is one silly, absurd thing, that is the DUMBEST DAMN THING I WAS EVER TAUGHT FROM A PULPIT and BELIEVED until I was blank years old.

Did you know boys and girls that males have one less rib than females? Easy to disprove you say. I like my friend needed a visual.

A 38 year old friend of mine came home from university sobbing about this lie she had grown up with. She had a humiliating head bump with her
english professor with whom she argued. He sent her to the anatomy lab.

I got told the same lie when I was a child. Except that I asked my neighbor who was a doctor if I could borrow an anatomy book (I had to see it for myself because it sounded absurd.) Sure enough, I realized it was a lie. However, I continued to justify my faith for quite a few more years.

Stop the itchy blanket of Creationism from spreading to our classrooms. Say no to Iron Age superstitions Evil_monster
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10-10-2012, 06:48 AM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
How about the idiots in the Philippines who have themselves nailed to a cross on Good Friday ? Weeping

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=suY1XN28XwY

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein Certified Ancient Astronaut Theorist and Levitating yogi, CAAT-LY.
Yeah, for verily I say unto thee, and this we know : Jebus no likey that which doth tickle thee unto thy nether regions.

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10-10-2012, 07:10 AM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
America-wise, 3 words; Westboro Baptist Church.

Leviticus does not justify stupidity, but it is more than enough to define corruption of the human mind.

[Image: 24851795.jpg]
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10-10-2012, 07:37 AM
RE: The silliest, funniest, and most absurd thing that _____ beleives.
(10-10-2012 07:10 AM)Matthew Laramore Wrote:  America-wise, 3 words; Westboro Baptist Church.

Not really, because most Evangelicals agree with the message...which is extreme intolerance towards gays. The only thing that people find outrageous is that these guys show their bigotry out in the open, while most Evangelicals keep it mostly hidden (except for the occasional outburst.)

That and the fact that Westboro is anti-American, while most Evangelicals believe that America is God's country and English is God's language. But other than those small differences, there is little that separates the people of Westboro Baptist Church from the rest of the born-again Evangelical crowd.

Stop the itchy blanket of Creationism from spreading to our classrooms. Say no to Iron Age superstitions Evil_monster
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