Things Not To Say During Sex
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15-02-2017, 09:15 PM
Things Not To Say During Sex
Reading Cosmo again. This article was on Things Not To Say During Sex.

Here's a few I came up with:

Smile for the camera!

How do you feel about clowns?

Wanna lick my toe nails?

You be Ponch and I'll be Jon. Then start playing the CHiPs theme song.

Check out my granny panties.

It puts the lotion in the basket. It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again. (Silence of the Lambs reference Tongue )

Talk dirty to me in Klingon.

Can we just go to Denny's instead?

Holy Ryan Gosling!!!!

Wanna try the eskimo trebuchet? No

...Got any to add?
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15-02-2017, 09:18 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
So when you said you loved animals you were including Donkeys right?

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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15-02-2017, 09:22 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
I feel like Cosmo is an evil magazine... (Also one of my students made that Silence of the Lambs reference today in class.) Though must admit, talking dirty to me in Klingon would be amazing.

Hmm, let's see:

Would you like to hear about my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ?

Need to think of a witty signature.
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15-02-2017, 09:26 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
You caught me on a good day...my rash isn't flaring up.
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15-02-2017, 09:28 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
(15-02-2017 09:22 PM)Shai Hulud Wrote:  I feel like Cosmo is an evil magazine... (Also one of my students made that Silence of the Lambs reference today in class.) Though must admit, talking dirty to me in Klingon would be amazing.

Hmm, let's see:

Would you like to hear about my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ?

It's the devil's magazine. It's on the tables in the waiting room for hell. Laugh out load
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15-02-2017, 10:16 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
"Oops!"

Wink

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15-02-2017, 10:21 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
"What's your name again?"

"If you keep trying to better yourself that's enough for me. We don't decide which hand we are dealt in life, but we make the decision to play it or fold it" - Nishi Karano Kaze
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15-02-2017, 10:23 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
"Did you just call me by my mom's name?"

"It smells like low tide in here."

"Did you gain weight?"

"It's smaller than I expected."

"Do you take cash or credit?"
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15-02-2017, 10:26 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
Is it supposed to taste like that?

Check out my now-defunct atheism blog. It's just a blog, no ads, no revenue, no gods.
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Atheism promotes critical thinking; theism promotes hypocritical thinking. -- Me
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15-02-2017, 10:27 PM
RE: Things Not To Say During Sex
"What is that SMELL?!?"

"Is it in yet?"

"Brace yourself!"

"Setting my phaser to fun!"

And of course, any variation of:

[Image: tumblr_m2kw1sUyMR1r8p5h3o1_500.gif]

"Theology made no provision for evolution. The biblical authors had missed the most important revelation of all! Could it be that they were not really privy to the thoughts of God?" - E. O. Wilson
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