Tired of living
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01-04-2017, 05:46 AM
RE: Tired of living
(31-03-2017 09:46 PM)Fireball Wrote:  
(31-03-2017 09:40 PM)KUSA Wrote:  You already have. I just don't have anyone to lean on right now. Just having someone reply makes me tear up.

I have always been a bottle it up person but it doesn't work for me anymore. Honestly, I actually am depressed. I hate saying that but it's true.

I feel so bad that I can't stop thinking of all the times I've been an ass and hurt other people. I deeply apologize for ever saying anything mean to anyone here.

I appreciate all of you.

Just roll with it for now. A lot of feelings are going through you, and you aren't going to be able to stop them; it's human nature. I would, however, suggest that you don't do a full confession here, before writing it all out somewhere else, and allowing it to rest there for awhile. Trust me on this- you're feeling a lot of grief, but may want to consider what you say before you commit it to the internet. Hug bud.

And to add to this, I find that when I'm in emotional turmoil, getting distance from my feelings by objectifying them helps. Mindful practices allow me to maintain my emotional equilibrium almost all the time, nowadays.
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01-04-2017, 06:50 AM
RE: Tired of living
(31-03-2017 08:52 PM)KUSA Wrote:  I've had so many arguments with family because everyone is stressed. I want this to be over. I feel terrible.

It truly sucks, but deaths in the family tend to bring out the worst in people at the worst possible time, making it even worse. Undecided

Hang in there, it will get better again.

[Image: dobie.png]Science is the process we've designed to be responsible for generating our best guess as to what the fuck is going on. Girly Man
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01-04-2017, 07:08 AM
RE: Tired of living
(31-03-2017 09:40 PM)KUSA Wrote:  
(31-03-2017 09:02 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  What can we do to help?

You already have. I just don't have anyone to lean on right now. Just having someone reply makes me tear up.

I have always been a bottle it up person but it doesn't work for me anymore. Honestly, I actually am depressed. I hate saying that but it's true.

I feel so bad that I can't stop thinking of all the times I've been an ass and hurt other people. I deeply apologize for ever saying anything mean to anyone here.

I appreciate all of you.

There are a lot of caring people here, rough edges and all.

I know that feeling all too well. The weight does get lighter.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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01-04-2017, 07:59 AM
RE: Tired of living
First: Hug

Death always throws us into a loop. When I lost my dog, I was in denial. It was just too unfair. I couldn't do anything for her.

My other dog was a big comfort. Dogs are awesome like that. I'm glad your puppy has been helping you both cope.

It's the suckiest part of life, losing others. But, with time it gets better. At the moment it may not seem so, but it will eventually.

All I can really offer are some virtual hugs, but know that I'm thinking of you, your wife, and your family.

Hug

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01-04-2017, 09:14 AM
RE: Tired of living
KUSA, I'm so sorry my friend I had no idea you had had a family tragedy, as you are young I'm guessing your sister in law was too and that the death was unexpected. I can't do much except give you a virtual man hug. Sad Hug
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01-04-2017, 09:18 AM
RE: Tired of living
(31-03-2017 08:38 PM)KUSA Wrote:  Do you ever just feel tired of living? I don't mean depressed per se, just tired of it all.

I feel tired. I feel sick of putting up with all the unnecessary crap.

**** I am not suicidal. I am not going to hurt myself. I just want to talk to anyone who is willing to listen.

> You will come through this because you are stronger than you think. Your sorrow will wane and you will gain life's experience. It's simply a matter of time.

> "Time devours all things." (Marcus Aurelius)
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01-04-2017, 09:26 AM
Tired of living
The death is a heavy weight to bear but dealing with bitter family members makes it so much worse.

My wife and I got married 5 years ago. We already had our kids so the family is blended. My youngest daughter has a mild form of autism. She overreacts at times because she doesn't know how to deal with some things. She loved her aunt tremendously. It hurts me that her older step sister told her that she isn't even part of the family.

My sister in law that died accepted me in the family immediately and was a kind and loving person. My other sister in law and my step mother were the opposite. They didn't want me in the family even before they met me (long story).

Now they want to act fake and put it all behind us. Fuck them.

I am sad. I am bitter.
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01-04-2017, 09:29 AM
RE: Tired of living
(01-04-2017 09:14 AM)adey67 Wrote:  KUSA, I'm so sorry my friend I had no idea you had had a family tragedy, as you are young I'm guessing your sister in law was too and that the death was unexpected. I can't do much except give you a virtual man hug. Sad Hug

> Ditto. Hug
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01-04-2017, 09:31 AM
RE: Tired of living
Death can make people rethink their relationships is it possible your step relatives are genuine ?
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01-04-2017, 09:39 AM
RE: Tired of living
Saw the title and immediately thought of a song I hadn't heard in years. My brain makes weird jumps without me asking. I am sorry KUSA, you have become a good friend and it hurts me to see you in pain. Here's the song I thought of.

She says she's tired of life
she must be tired of something




#sigh
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