Tricking christians
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
30-06-2015, 04:36 AM
Tricking christians
I really felt like sharing this, cuz it made
me lol inside.

My christian parents has ofcourse not read the
Bible, which gives me the opportunity to have a lot of fun.

A few days ago we were sitting around the dinnertable when I suddenly said:
"A new law has been made in Iran, it's pretty interesting..."
Dad: "Ohh what law?"
Me: "The law says that if a rapist gets caught raping his victim, he gets to marry the victim he just traumatized after paying money for his wrongdoing, and she can't divorce him ever."
"One must be pretty insane to come up with such a law.."
Dad: "That's just horrible. That means you can just rape a pretty girl you wanna marry in front of a police station... I bet they got it from the Quran."
Me: " Yeah.. Probably..."

I didn't want to reveal that it's from the old testament, cuz then it's gonna be difficult to
do this kind of things later with other verses from it.

But it was fun making him admit he think God is an immoral nutjob.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 5 users Like Typho2k's post
30-06-2015, 04:42 AM
RE: Tricking christians
Both the Quran and the NT are born of the OT. Why not admit to your father where it is from?

What is the point of this: "I didn't want to reveal that it's from the old testament, cuz then it's gonna be difficult to
do this kind of things later with other verses from it." if you are never going to reveal the source?

Seems like a waste of time to me.

NOTE: Member, Tomasia uses this site to slander other individuals. He then later proclaims it a joke, but not in public.
I will call him a liar and a dog here and now.
Banjo.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
30-06-2015, 05:56 AM (This post was last modified: 30-06-2015 06:07 AM by god has no twitter account.)
RE: Tricking christians
(30-06-2015 04:36 AM)Typho2k Wrote:  I really felt like sharing this, cuz it made
me lol inside.

My christian parents has ofcourse not read the
Bible, which gives me the opportunity to have a lot of fun.

A few days ago we were sitting around the dinnertable when I suddenly said:
"A new law has been made in Iran, it's pretty interesting..."
Dad: "Ohh what law?"
Me: "The law says that if a rapist gets caught raping his victim, he gets to marry the victim he just traumatized after paying money for his wrongdoing, and she can't divorce him ever."
"One must be pretty insane to come up with such a law.."
Dad: "That's just horrible. That means you can just rape a pretty girl you wanna marry in front of a police station... I bet they got it from the Quran."
Me: " Yeah.. Probably..."

I didn't want to reveal that it's from the old testament, cuz then it's gonna be difficult to
do this kind of things later with other verses from it.

But it was fun making him admit he think God is an immoral nutjob.

Actually, it's he that can't divorce her - not the other way round. He has to pay 50 pieces of silver to her father also.

However, these only apply if he is caught in the act. Presumably, if he isn't caught in the act, then he doesn't have to marry her nor does he have to pay her father 50 pieces of silver, nor does he get to go past go and collect £200.

The passage is: Deuteronomy 22:28-29 NLT

Marburg virus, Ebola, Rabies, HIV, Smallpox, Hantavirus, Dengue Fever all brought to you by god - who cares for us and loves us all Censored
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
30-06-2015, 06:28 AM
RE: Tricking christians
If you want to pull another good one from Deuteronomy 22, tell your dad that Iran is considering a law to make it so if an unmarried virgin is raped inside the city limits, both she and her rapist is to be put to death. She will be spared if the rape happens outside of the city.

You might not want to tell your dad about the impending law that allows parents to kill their unruly children. Tongue
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like RobbyPants's post
30-06-2015, 11:17 AM
RE: Tricking christians
Along those lines what about the law that if a wife helps her husband in a fight by grabbing the other guy's penis, her hand should be cut off.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
30-06-2015, 11:29 AM
RE: Tricking christians
Nice job.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
30-06-2015, 12:27 PM
RE: Tricking christians
(30-06-2015 04:36 AM)Typho2k Wrote:  I really felt like sharing this, cuz it made
me lol inside.

My christian parents has ofcourse not read the
Bible, which gives me the opportunity to have a lot of fun.

A few days ago we were sitting around the dinnertable when I suddenly said:
"A new law has been made in Iran, it's pretty interesting..."
Dad: "Ohh what law?"
Me: "The law says that if a rapist gets caught raping his victim, he gets to marry the victim he just traumatized after paying money for his wrongdoing, and she can't divorce him ever."
"One must be pretty insane to come up with such a law.."
Dad: "That's just horrible. That means you can just rape a pretty girl you wanna marry in front of a police station... I bet they got it from the Quran."
Me: " Yeah.. Probably..."

I didn't want to reveal that it's from the old testament, cuz then it's gonna be difficult to
do this kind of things later with other verses from it.

But it was fun making him admit he think God is an immoral nutjob.

I do the same thing with my wife. The real fun comes when you do the revieal thou.

The dance that they have to preform to back track what they said.

I was talking to my wife about how people believe in all sorts of silly things like unicorns. She say's no one believes Unicorns are real.

I said "You would have to. You just got done telling me that the bible is 100% true. Unicorns are in the bible.

Wife: Well yeah...I guess if the bible said it.

Me: Wait what? Now you believe in Unicorns? What about giants,or talking donkeys.

Wife: Well if the it's in the bible. It has to be true.

Me: You just said no one believes in that stuff.

Wife: I didn't say that! Now you just trying to confuse me!
There was no getting threw to her at the point she put her bible ear muffs on.

Don't Live each day like it's your last. Live each day like you have 541 days after that one where every choice you make will have lasting implications to you and the world around you. ~ Tim Minchin
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Commonsensei's post
30-06-2015, 12:47 PM
RE: Tricking christians
"What do you think of wealth redistribution? You know, taking money and resources from those who have them and giving them to those who need them? From each according to their means to each according to their needs?"

"I hate it! That sounds like godless Communism! THIS IS A CHRISTIAN NATION GODDAMMIT!"
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like Reltzik's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: