Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
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28-01-2017, 01:06 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
(28-01-2017 01:03 PM)adey67 Wrote:  
(28-01-2017 12:36 PM)JDog554 Wrote:  Trust me, from someone who has suffered from Depression their entire life, I know how it is. We do not want you to feel bad because you didn't do anything so do whatever you need to feel better because we just want the best for you. Just try your best not to be too hard on yourself ok?

Thanks JDog I must admit to being a bit over sensitive at the moment, truth is I'm scared I hope all will be ok but what if it isn't how will I deal with bad news, how do I tell my boys, will it hurt, all these things are buzzing round my head.

I don't blame you but that is something you can deal with when the time comes, live day by day, enjoy the days you have until then.

"If you keep trying to better yourself that's enough for me. We don't decide which hand we are dealt in life, but we make the decision to play it or fold it" - Nishi Karano Kaze
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28-01-2017, 01:11 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
(28-01-2017 01:03 PM)adey67 Wrote:  
(28-01-2017 12:36 PM)JDog554 Wrote:  Trust me, from someone who has suffered from Depression their entire life, I know how it is. We do not want you to feel bad because you didn't do anything so do whatever you need to feel better because we just want the best for you. Just try your best not to be too hard on yourself ok?

Thanks JDog I must admit to being a bit over sensitive at the moment, truth is I'm scared I hope all will be ok but what if it isn't how will I deal with bad news, how do I tell my boys, will it hurt, all these things are buzzing round my head.

I hope all will be okay *hugs*. Just take it in pieces. From what you said, it sounds like you caught things early, so if it is an anything, you have a very good chance of getting out from under it. My bf's mom had skin cancer, it was caught early, all taken care of, no problems.

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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28-01-2017, 01:13 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
(28-01-2017 01:03 PM)adey67 Wrote:  Thanks JDog I must admit to being a bit over sensitive at the moment, truth is I'm scared I hope all will be ok but what if it isn't how will I deal with bad news, how do I tell my boys, will it hurt, all these things are buzzing round my head.

I know this is off-topic from the OP, but as one with experience in such things, all I can tell you is that:
  • You are stronger than you think you are
  • Whatever happens, you can handle it.
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28-01-2017, 01:24 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
(28-01-2017 09:43 AM)dancefortwo Wrote:  I don't understand why anyone would care what other people eat. It's just food.

Jennybee could be eating shit on a roof shingle and I still wouldn't care. Laugh out load

She's a really decent, well mannered, funny.....(VERY funny) person. She's not a hypocrite and she's got a killer sense of Irish humor. Laughat So what's not to like?

Jennybee? We all think you're the best! Big Grin

Heart

Exactly, most of you are baby eating atheists, and I don't go after you for that... Tongue In all seriousness, to each their own. Whatever's important to a person, fine by me if they're not hurting anyone. And Jenny most certainly isn't hurting anyone by sticking to her vegan diet, nor is she pushing it on anyone, and she's also simultaneously giving some of the kindest advice people come across on the forum. Smile

Need to think of a witty signature.
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28-01-2017, 01:26 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
(28-01-2017 12:51 PM)Aliza Wrote:  That's how I meant it. If someone has been here awhile, they've established that they're not a troll, then treat them as if they're an actual human being with sensitivities.

Sensitivities differ.

Each and everyone poster is a human but that does not entitle some to being treated softly. Sure, when no one starts sling shit then there is no reason for starting it but that's all.

I try to treat people with same respect they afford to me (except when I'm not). It's not up to me to judge if I'm succeeding though.

Quote:Agree to disagree doesn't need to mean that there can be no discussion. It just means that in the end, if you can't persuade someone to your way of thinking, then let it go. Maybe that other person's views have merit that you can't see. Badgering and attacking them at that point is only going to hurt.

Depends on the person and subject I guess. Overall I'm more interested in showing my perspective - I doubt that people find me convincing. More than that I doubt that we can truly convince other of something, it's just smile and nod and then return to the same thoughts that were in the beginning.

(28-01-2017 01:13 PM)Heath_Tierney Wrote:  [...]Whatever happens, you can handle it.[/list]

This may be true for specific person but otherwise suicides prove that sentence false.

The first revolt is against the supreme tyranny of theology, of the phantom of God. As long as we have a master in heaven, we will be slaves on earth.

Mikhail Bakunin.
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28-01-2017, 02:05 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
Nope. Nope. Nope. Sad

You're more valuable to this place than I am. If anyone is going to be slouching off into the night, it's gonna be me.

Don't let those gnomes and their illusions get you down. They're just gnomes and illusions.

--Jake the Dog, Adventure Time

Alouette, je te plumerai.
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28-01-2017, 06:17 PM (This post was last modified: 28-01-2017 06:21 PM by RocketSurgeon76.)
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
It can be difficult to separate ourselves from our ideas.

When your ideas are under attack in a debate, it's easy to think that it's you who is under attack.

Many atheists make this same mistake, turning the examination of ideas into a personal issue, at which point they become rather nasty or get hurt... ironic, since much of the position of a skeptic is to say that no idea is undeserving of attack and rigorous examination. This is why we can simultaneously attack Islam as an idea and yet be defensive in the face of people who attack Muslims in general, garnering the ire of conservative Christians who see our defense of Muslims as being apologists for Islam.

Personally, I expect that if I cannot support/defend my ideas, they should be attacked until I am forced to drop them, but if the attacks become personal attacks against ME, then I'm quite right to get angry about it and become hostile.

With respect to Jenny's Veganism, I don't think that any of us disrespect her for being one, or think she should not be able to freely make that choice and live that lifestyle. Saying that I think Veganism is silly, or that I have in my experience found many Vegans to be almost religious in their desire to "spread the good word" of Veganism, does not mean that I think Jenny is one of those. [Edit: I Don't think that Veganism is silly... I'm just using myself as an example.]

Likewise, Shai Hulud is easily one of my favorite people on this board, even though I disagree with his religious beliefs. I certainly hold that he has every right to believe what he wants about God, and respect him for not trying to proselytize about it after I have made it clear that I actively chose not to adopt his outlook. I do not need to respect his ideas/beliefs (or he mine) in order for me to respect him as a person.

As another example, my best friend in the world believes in polyamory. I am a monogamist, and find the idea of polyamory to be somewhat... well, abhorrent. But I respect his right to hold the views he does, and I love and respect him more than anyone else but my own Beloved (who is a Christian with whom I disagree on a great many things in that subject).

So, to Jenny, a plea: Please don't confuse criticism and skepticism of Veganism by a few members, or observations by some of us about the nature of SOME Vegans, with personal attacks against you or any sort of disrespect of your lifestyle. Please. We love and respect you, and this forum would become a much drearier place without you here. I can think of almost no one whose absence would more negatively impact this forum.

I personally think that your Yoga and Veganism are admirable characteristics that add a needed outlook that others here lack, and that it makes your voice that much more vibrant and necessary. Likewise, Aliza's brand of non-proselytizing theism brings a voice and perspective to this table that would be a great loss, if she ever felt so disrespected by a few of our disrespectful, radical fanatics that she decided to stop coming here.

"Theology made no provision for evolution. The biblical authors had missed the most important revelation of all! Could it be that they were not really privy to the thoughts of God?" - E. O. Wilson
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28-01-2017, 06:31 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
Does no one else notice that Jennybee hasn't gone anywhere? She has been here reading and posting.

Perhaps the simplest thing is that an apology is offered for the offensive post. That apology can be accepted or rejected as JB sees fit. But surely the entire forum hasn't caused offense.

See here they are the bruises some were self-inflicted and some showed up along the way. - JF
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28-01-2017, 06:34 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
(28-01-2017 08:54 AM)jennybee Wrote:  
(28-01-2017 08:38 AM)skyking Wrote:  Knee jerkiness is the problem. it is mostly just jerkiness. People assume quite wrongly that you are somehow this militant vegan goddess, and they are so far from the truth there. They knee jerk out their response to this imagined threat ( some really vivid imagination to talk to you and get to that !!!) and type out some shitty response. If this is it, Jenny, just know I respect you and your choices, value your input and indeed will miss you greatly.
Hard to quantify it all, but between your irreverence, penchant for finding funny pictures and starting funny threads, respect for all, knowledge of food and desire to share it, empathy for others and kind words, you represent the best this place has to offer all rolled up in one.

I don't think they assume I'm a militant vegan. I think they just have a problem with vegans for some reason and somehow feel the need to put that on me.

Thats crazy. You would think that on an atheist forum, people would be a bit more understanding. Please don't go, I have no one else to make sex jokes with.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
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28-01-2017, 07:07 PM
RE: Urgent! Jennybee is leaving!
Jenny, this is going to be a ramble so I hope that you can follow my erratically swerving train of thought. Sorry for the lack of brevity.

As I mentioned elsewhere, you and I have very different lifestyles, though I have never considered this a problem. Let me elaborate. I am an unabashed carnivore. I do not yoga.

I wish that I could be more like you.

Not the diet or the exercize, though I do wish that I were more healthy. Those are superficial details. It is your fierce joie de vivre that I envy. Your quintessential Jenniness. I am the opposite of that. All cold intellect, emotionally detatched and closetted. I make friends only with great effort, largely theirs, and do not maintain them as well as they deserve. I am a social tumbleweed, rootless and forever drifting with the breeze. One consequence of this is that I lack the emotions or the words to properly convey how deeply I wish that I could live as you do.

Wherever your path takes you, you are going to encounter the ignorant, the disrespectful and the uncouth. Some of those are just plain jerks, some decent people having an off day, and yet others too caught up in the gestault of an ill-conceived argument to avoid lashing out at any who disagree. Because you wear your heart on your sleeve I fear this will hurt you more than most. It is he curse of empathy. As you have said, one remedy to this is simply to pick your friends. In this case that will have the unfortunate consequence of parting you not just from those who have been disagreeable but all those others who treasure you for not being just one more non-descript, one-dimensional atheist. Let me suggest an alternative.

Many years ago I met the woman who would one day become my wife. She was a vegetarian at the time, though she is since lapsed. Not my doing! It was the turkey dinner at Christmas that brought her low. One consequence of this was that I had to learn to cook vegetarian meals. No simple task. I eat to live, she lives to eat. An ongoing irritant in our relationship. For me, if it is on the table and holds still for too long it's fair game. But through great effort on her part and a lot of trial and error on my part (no, you can't have my recipe for vulcanized tofu) I did learn.

Years later with meat a regular part of our meals I still can't bring myself to put hamburger in my spaghetti sauce. The vegetarian equivalent is simply better. People and perspectives change.

I am not suggesting that you launch a vegan crusade. We both know that would be foolish and pointless. I am suggesting that you try to help those who are inconsiderate become better people. It is the harder road. Picking your friends is easy. Helping the abbrasive, the obnoxious, and the inconsiderate to become people that you would be proud to call a friend is a difficult art but it is one that I feel you are uniquely qualified to practice.

Please stay and help these meatheads become better people. We need you.

In closing, there is a matter that should be dealt with regardless of whether you stay or leave.

JennyBee, for loving unreservedly and leading a rich life that you enjoy geefully and shamelessly we hereby confer upon you the title of Unapologist.

[Image: Unapologist_zps4bmtwqky.jpg]

---
Flesh and blood of a dead star, slain in the apocalypse of supernova, resurrected by four billion years of continuous autocatalytic reaction and crowned with the emergent property of sentience in the dream that the universe might one day understand itself.
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