Virginity
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10-10-2013, 12:34 PM
RE: Virginity
There really is no difference between a virgin person and a non virgin.
We put value on it only because someone came up for a special name for it.
I can't remember the first time I had a poo, or shook hands, or jumped, or ate sushi or had "impure thoughts" and really, I don't think it is important to others whether I have done something for the first time or not.
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10-10-2013, 12:35 PM
RE: Virginity
Yes. People can have active sex lives without genital penetration. People without any interest in sex can have penetrated / been penetrated. It's symbolic value as an indicator of "purity" is medieval at best.

So, its non-symbolic quality isn't indicative, and it's symbolic quality is primitive.

Virginity's only potential value is a private, personal or interpersonal one, because it is after all a person's body. If someone attaches personal value to presence or lack of virginity, like the presence or lack of a tattoo, then that's up to them.

WWMWAZSKDTVQHTMJD?
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10-10-2013, 01:14 PM
RE: Virginity
I would post at great length, but I agree with most of what's already been said.

I really, really hate the word "virgin." It brings to mind the idea of women as property to be given/sold from her father to her husband, and that her only value is an untouched cunt. And the idea of it just helping to ensure the husband's paternity of the children.

In more recent times, though, I think the whole virginity movement creates unhealthy attitudes about sex. It causes a lot of slut-shaming, and women STILL basing their value on the untouched0ness of their genitals. And stupid things like teens having anal sex to preserve their virginity. Not to mention, if you gotta have PIV sex to be a nonvirgin, then a whole lot of homosexuals are virgins, including ones who have a lot of sex. The whole concept is outdated.

And hymens! Girls can break their hymen doing sports, or some don't really have one to begin with. And yet I've seen people actually considering hymenoplasty to "restore their virginity" because they had sex and regretted it. How insane is that? Plastic surgery to restore a flap of skin partially covering the vaginal opening, probably quite expensive and totally unnecessary, to "feel like a virgin" again. (I can understand cases where people live in places under Sharia law and don't wanna get stoned to death, but I'm talking about Americans). I've encountered people who place an insane value on the hymen, which is beyond stupid in a day and age when most of us don't have to show off a bloody sheet after the honeymoon as "proof" of virginity or get stoned to death.

I think it also created unrealistic views of sex, like it's gonna be awesome and wonderful between two people who've been waiting for it forever and have overly high expectations. Sex is awkward the first time. It's bound to be disappointing if you waited for years and then it's kind of less fun than expected because you're so nervous and don't know what you're doing. Like anything, good sex takes practice.

Damnit, I said I wouldn't post at great length. Oh well.
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10-10-2013, 01:31 PM
RE: Virginity
Quote: . And stupid things like teens having anal sex to preserve their virginity.

Hey now, don't go bashing anal sex. Anal sex is FUN.
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10-10-2013, 02:09 PM
RE: Virginity
(10-10-2013 01:31 PM)natachan Wrote:  
Quote: . And stupid things like teens having anal sex to preserve their virginity.

Hey now, don't go bashing anal sex. Anal sex is FUN.

I'm just saying it doesn't preserve your virginity. =D
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10-10-2013, 03:37 PM
RE: Virginity
(10-10-2013 08:58 AM)Cathym112 Wrote:  "Valuing virginity, either through cultural or religious traditions, devalues women."

Agree?

I value virginity in a woman because the thought of being first to "tap that" appeals to me....especially if the woman is a hottie.

Being a virgin makes a woman more attractive in the eyes of some men.

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10-10-2013, 03:42 PM
RE: Virginity
(10-10-2013 03:37 PM)Heywood Jahblome Wrote:  I value virginity in a woman because the thought of being first to "tap that" appeals to me....especially if the woman is a hottie.

Being a virgin makes a woman more attractive in the eyes of some men.
It's true that some seem to fetishize the idea of "deflowering" a woman, but I still see it as misogynistic. (The idea that it's ok for men to sleep around, but women are "damaged goods" if they do the same thing just reinforces the idea that a woman's only value is an unused vagina and to be a man's exclusive sex toy.)
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10-10-2013, 03:52 PM
RE: Virginity
(10-10-2013 03:42 PM)amyb Wrote:  It's true that some seem to fetishize the idea of "deflowering" a woman, but I still see it as misogynistic. (The idea that it's ok for men to sleep around, but women are "damaged goods" if they do the same thing just reinforces the idea that a woman's only value is an unused vagina and to be a man's exclusive sex toy.)

But is it a man's fault that he prefers virginity or is it merely an artifact of nature?

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10-10-2013, 05:05 PM
RE: Virginity
Again, heywood, the slight of hand.

Why do you Do this? To irritate me because it's rude and passive aggressive? In case you didn't get the memo, being passive aggressive is the most aggressive stance to take. your personal value of virginity was NOT the topic. Whether your value of that virginity actually degrades and devalues women because she is nothing more than for you to be the first to tap was the question. Concentrate please!!

But I digress...That would be not an artifact of nature but one of culture.

The things you consider gross To eat are a product of the culture in which you were raised. Same with your attitude regarding sex.

There are cultures where women are not considered the sex object or property to be used by men, like in a polygamous relationship, but rather a polyandramous relationship where it's one woman and multiple husbands. Therefore - there is no emphasis or value on virginity

A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day - Bill Watterson
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10-10-2013, 05:38 PM
RE: Virginity
(10-10-2013 05:05 PM)Cathym112 Wrote:  There are cultures where women are not considered the sex object or property to be used by men, like in a polygamous relationship, but rather a polyandramous relationship where it's one woman and multiple husbands. Therefore - there is no emphasis or value on virginity

How do you know virgins are not found to be more attractive to males in cultures which practice polyandry?

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