Walk of Shame
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15-04-2015, 01:52 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(15-04-2015 09:27 AM)DLJ Wrote:  
(14-04-2015 05:42 AM)RobbyPants Wrote:  ...
So, that's how I ended up locked outside of my house naked.

... your honour.

Consider

I take it from this that your wife reads TTA and still needs convincing?

It's either that or tell her what I do outside in the drive way at 3:00 AM when she thinks I'm sleeping.
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15-04-2015, 08:29 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(15-04-2015 10:59 AM)onlinebiker Wrote:  
(15-04-2015 09:44 AM)Thumpalumpacus Wrote:  All I have to say is, never try to drink the ugly off a woman. Whether you succeed or fail, nothing good can come of it.

I know evolution is real....

Because I once woke up with the Missing Link.....

...
Someone needs to put this on a t-shirt.

(30-03-2015 08:47 PM)Colourcraze Wrote:  IT'S THE HOLY GHOST oooOOOOOOOOOOooooooo
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16-04-2015, 01:35 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
Something that occurred to me....

We're all talking about situations where we were the one that woke up hung over, regretful and embarrassed........


What about the flip side????

When I lived in Marin County California - I worked part-time as a bartender at the local watering hole.

One night a woman came in -- she was a regular of sorts --- she'd show up once or twice a month -- and drink copious amounts of vodka.. Fun, good looking -mid 30's or so and obviously well off... Drove a 450 SL......

So that night, I was about the only straight male in the place. (It was one of those kind of bars - that serve the locals equally. Some nights gay, some nights straight, some nights lesbian -- it wasn't a sanctioned thing -- just kind of worked out that way...... Did I mention this was California????)

Anyway -- she sat at the bar, drank a few, and got friendlier and friendlier... It got even MORE "friendly" at closing time......

OK.... Call me slime... I went home with a great looking, well heeled woman....... She was also at least 10 years older than me, so she KNEW what the score was....

sooooooo.....

The sun comes up in the east the next day, as it is wont to do ---- and I wake up -- look about, and say to myself --- "Damn boy -- ya done GOOD this time"....

Nice place in the hills of Olema (overlooking Tomales bay). Expensive obviously. The garage probably cost more than I'll earn in a lifetime. All the electronic goodies of the day -- and all top of the line. Monstrous 4 post canopy bed - with netting....

She wakes up --

Looks at me....

And says.....


"Ohhhhhh gawwwwddd"..

.....

I can't help but laugh.....

I say -- "Yeah -- I know how THAT is..... I know EXACTLY how you feel"...


She begins to stutter, stammer, apologize -- I cut her off......

"Would it make it a whole lot easier for you - if we say this NEVER happened???????"

.....

She'd still come into the bar once in a while -- and was friendly enough....

But.......

Well....

You know how it is.....

.......................................

The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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16-04-2015, 01:40 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(16-04-2015 01:35 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  Something that occurred to me....

We're all talking about situations where we were the one that woke up hung over, regretful and embarrassed........


What about the flip side????

When I lived in Marin County California - I worked part-time as a bartender at the local watering hole.

One night a woman came in -- she was a regular of sorts --- she'd show up once or twice a month -- and drink copious amounts of vodka.. Fun, good looking -mid 30's or so and obviously well off... Drove a 450 SL......

So that night, I was about the only straight male in the place. (It was one of those kind of bars - that serve the locals equally. Some nights gay, some nights straight, some nights lesbian -- it wasn't a sanctioned thing -- just kind of worked out that way...... Did I mention this was California????)

Anyway -- she sat at the bar, drank a few, and got friendlier and friendlier... It got even MORE "friendly" at closing time......

OK.... Call me slime... I went home with a great looking, well heeled woman....... She was also at least 10 years older than me, so she KNEW what the score was....

sooooooo.....

The sun comes up in the east the next day, as it is wont to do ---- and I wake up -- look about, and say to myself --- "Damn boy -- ya done GOOD this time"....

Nice place in the hills of Olema (overlooking Tomales bay). Expensive obviously. The garage probably cost more than I'll earn in a lifetime. All the electronic goodies of the day -- and all top of the line. Monstrous 4 post canopy bed - with netting....

She wakes up --

Looks at me....

And says.....


"Ohhhhhh gawwwwddd"..

.....

I can't help but laugh.....

I say -- "Yeah -- I know how THAT is..... I know EXACTLY how you feel"...


She begins to stutter, stammer, apologize -- I cut her off......

"Would it make it a whole lot easier for you - if we say this NEVER happened???????"

.....

She'd still come into the bar once in a while -- and was friendly enough....

But.......

Well....

You know how it is.....

Yeh I still haven't shared my latest walk of shame. Not quite recovered from it. Blush When I get laid again and do more of a victory lap instead of leaving in a taxi after having to ask for the address cause I didn't know where the hell I was ... I might share. Might. Probably not.

"If there's a single thing that life teaches us, it's that wishing doesn't make it so." - Lev Grossman
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16-04-2015, 01:46 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(16-04-2015 01:40 PM)Nurse Wrote:  
(16-04-2015 01:35 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  Something that occurred to me....

We're all talking about situations where we were the one that woke up hung over, regretful and embarrassed........


What about the flip side????

When I lived in Marin County California - I worked part-time as a bartender at the local watering hole.

One night a woman came in -- she was a regular of sorts --- she'd show up once or twice a month -- and drink copious amounts of vodka.. Fun, good looking -mid 30's or so and obviously well off... Drove a 450 SL......

So that night, I was about the only straight male in the place. (It was one of those kind of bars - that serve the locals equally. Some nights gay, some nights straight, some nights lesbian -- it wasn't a sanctioned thing -- just kind of worked out that way...... Did I mention this was California????)

Anyway -- she sat at the bar, drank a few, and got friendlier and friendlier... It got even MORE "friendly" at closing time......

OK.... Call me slime... I went home with a great looking, well heeled woman....... She was also at least 10 years older than me, so she KNEW what the score was....

sooooooo.....

The sun comes up in the east the next day, as it is wont to do ---- and I wake up -- look about, and say to myself --- "Damn boy -- ya done GOOD this time"....

Nice place in the hills of Olema (overlooking Tomales bay). Expensive obviously. The garage probably cost more than I'll earn in a lifetime. All the electronic goodies of the day -- and all top of the line. Monstrous 4 post canopy bed - with netting....

She wakes up --

Looks at me....

And says.....


"Ohhhhhh gawwwwddd"..

.....

I can't help but laugh.....

I say -- "Yeah -- I know how THAT is..... I know EXACTLY how you feel"...


She begins to stutter, stammer, apologize -- I cut her off......

"Would it make it a whole lot easier for you - if we say this NEVER happened???????"

.....

She'd still come into the bar once in a while -- and was friendly enough....

But.......

Well....

You know how it is.....

Yeh I still haven't shared my latest walk of shame. Not quite recovered from it. Blush When I get laid again and do more of a victory lap instead of leaving in a taxi after having to ask for the address cause I didn't know where the hell I was ... I might share. Might. Probably not.

I could always do my impression of a priest - and you could do confessional.....


heh

.......................................

The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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16-04-2015, 01:51 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(16-04-2015 01:46 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  I could always do my impression of a priest - and you could do confessional.....

You'se gots to do your penance on your knees... Tongue

We'll love you just the way you are
If you're perfect -- Alanis Morissette
(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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16-04-2015, 01:52 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(16-04-2015 01:46 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  
(16-04-2015 01:40 PM)Nurse Wrote:  Yeh I still haven't shared my latest walk of shame. Not quite recovered from it. Blush When I get laid again and do more of a victory lap instead of leaving in a taxi after having to ask for the address cause I didn't know where the hell I was ... I might share. Might. Probably not.

I could always do my impression of a priest - and you could do confessional.....


heh

Wouldn't she have to pretend to be a 10 year old boy?

(31-07-2014 04:37 PM)Luminon Wrote:  America is full of guns, but they're useless, because nobody has the courage to shoot an IRS agent in self-defense
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16-04-2015, 01:57 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(16-04-2015 01:52 PM)Revenant77x Wrote:  
(16-04-2015 01:46 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  I could always do my impression of a priest - and you could do confessional.....


heh

Wouldn't she have to pretend to be a 10 year old boy?

Yeah... there is that..

Damn....

Another good idea shot right in the ass......

.......................................

The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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16-04-2015, 02:03 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
When I was 16 I dated the daughter of two prison guards. Got caught in her bedroom by Mom. Bedroom is at the top of the stairs.

Found my pants, got to the landing, couldn't think of anything to say so I turned and said: "Well, this is awkward".

Suddenly found myself looking up the stairs.

The essence of life is statistical improbability on a colossal scale.
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16-04-2015, 02:20 PM
RE: Walk of Shame
(16-04-2015 01:40 PM)Nurse Wrote:  
(16-04-2015 01:35 PM)onlinebiker Wrote:  Something that occurred to me....

We're all talking about situations where we were the one that woke up hung over, regretful and embarrassed........


What about the flip side????

When I lived in Marin County California - I worked part-time as a bartender at the local watering hole.

One night a woman came in -- she was a regular of sorts --- she'd show up once or twice a month -- and drink copious amounts of vodka.. Fun, good looking -mid 30's or so and obviously well off... Drove a 450 SL......

So that night, I was about the only straight male in the place. (It was one of those kind of bars - that serve the locals equally. Some nights gay, some nights straight, some nights lesbian -- it wasn't a sanctioned thing -- just kind of worked out that way...... Did I mention this was California????)

Anyway -- she sat at the bar, drank a few, and got friendlier and friendlier... It got even MORE "friendly" at closing time......

OK.... Call me slime... I went home with a great looking, well heeled woman....... She was also at least 10 years older than me, so she KNEW what the score was....

sooooooo.....

The sun comes up in the east the next day, as it is wont to do ---- and I wake up -- look about, and say to myself --- "Damn boy -- ya done GOOD this time"....

Nice place in the hills of Olema (overlooking Tomales bay). Expensive obviously. The garage probably cost more than I'll earn in a lifetime. All the electronic goodies of the day -- and all top of the line. Monstrous 4 post canopy bed - with netting....

She wakes up --

Looks at me....

And says.....


"Ohhhhhh gawwwwddd"..

.....

I can't help but laugh.....

I say -- "Yeah -- I know how THAT is..... I know EXACTLY how you feel"...


She begins to stutter, stammer, apologize -- I cut her off......

"Would it make it a whole lot easier for you - if we say this NEVER happened???????"

.....

She'd still come into the bar once in a while -- and was friendly enough....

But.......

Well....

You know how it is.....

Yeh I still haven't shared my latest walk of shame. Not quite recovered from it. Blush When I get laid again and do more of a victory lap instead of leaving in a taxi after having to ask for the address cause I didn't know where the hell I was ... I might share. Might. Probably not.

Just be sure to snap a few selfies.

Check out my now-defunct atheism blog. It's just a blog, no ads, no revenue, no gods.
----
Atheism promotes critical thinking; theism promotes hypocritical thinking. -- Me
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