Weirdest bible story
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19-01-2017, 08:40 AM
Weirdest bible story
What in you opinion is the Weirdest story in the bible?
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19-01-2017, 08:49 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
All of it.

"If you keep trying to better yourself that's enough for me. We don't decide which hand we are dealt in life, but we make the decision to play it or fold it" - Nishi Karano Kaze
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19-01-2017, 09:07 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
Well, I don't know about weird but the story of Elijah being teased by a bunch of kids because he's bald and then god sends a couple of bears to kill the kids.

And he went up from thence unto Bethel: and as he was going up by the way, there came forth little children out of the city, and mocked him, and said unto him, Go up, thou bald head; go up, thou bald head. 2 Kings 2:23

God's such a fun guy.

[Image: a0d236a4fda4cb6836d1a3bb366962b2.jpg]

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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19-01-2017, 09:26 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
Everything between the covers...................

.......................................

The difference between prayer and masturbation - is when a guy is through masturbating - he has something to show for his efforts.
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19-01-2017, 09:37 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
Well, it is "The Weirdest Story Ever Told", right?

Frankly, it really isn't weirder than most other mythologies, it just isn't any saner either.

Atheism: it's not just for communists any more!
America July 4 1776 - November 8 2016 RIP
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19-01-2017, 09:48 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
The weirdest thing about the stories in the bible is that people believed them.

Lord of the Rings would be more believable.

'Murican Canadian
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19-01-2017, 10:06 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
Lots of competition for this one, but my vote for the weirdest story in the Bible is when God gives Moses his great commission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt, and then almost immediately after that, God tries to kill Moses. Not to worry -- his wife saves him by circumcising their son with a sharp stone and throwing the foreskin at Moses with the exclamation "Thou art a bloody husband to me."

There's plenty of weirdness in the Bible, but I can't think of anything weirder than that -- except maybe the long acid trip that constitutes Revelation.
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19-01-2017, 10:36 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
(19-01-2017 09:48 AM)yakherder Wrote:  Lord of the Rings would be more believable.

You should read S.M. Stirling's Emberverse series. After a change disables all technology in an instant, and changes the laws of nature so not even gunpowder will work any longer, people have to survive and then rebuild. Various groups latch on to different things, and one group ends up being called the Dunedain.

It started because there was a need for a roving group like the Rangers from LOTR, and this young woman was obsessed with the books. Cue a generation down the line, who refer to the LOTR books as "the histories" and believe in it.

Actually, as a whole, the series is really quite good on exploring facets of human belief and the nature behind them. Christian kingdoms ranging from one that borrows from LOTR mixed with Arthurian legend to New Deseret of the Mormons, Pagan alliances, people trying to rebuild America, a resurgence of Native American tribes, etc.

At one point, one Queen makes Catholicism the official religion of her realm because she needs to keep the population docile and can invoke the divine right of kings/queens on the newer generation, but at the same time picks and chooses her battles with the Church carefully, because it's survived more empires than hers by being politically astute. When representatives from the Pope arrive from Europe, she ends up, for example, deposing her pet anti-Pope and bowing to central authority, knowing that in practice, as long as she's giving that lip service, she can keep running things however she wants.

Need to think of a witty signature.
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19-01-2017, 10:51 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
The part of the book that talks about a capricious space wizard with a massive inferiority complex and a real short temper repeatedly getting pissed at the ants he created for not loving him enough to the point where, after several failed attempts to get them to love him by ordering theft, rape, and genocide, is reduced to threatening torture for the ones that he simply doesn't like or love him properly while the ants scurry about saying how awesome and cool this wizard is.

TL/DR: the whole damn thing.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
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19-01-2017, 10:56 AM
RE: Weirdest bible story
(19-01-2017 10:36 AM)Shai Hulud Wrote:  
(19-01-2017 09:48 AM)yakherder Wrote:  Lord of the Rings would be more believable.

You should read S.M. Stirling's Emberverse series. After a change disables all technology in an instant, and changes the laws of nature so not even gunpowder will work any longer, people have to survive and then rebuild. Various groups latch on to different things, and one group ends up being called the Dunedain.

It started because there was a need for a roving group like the Rangers from LOTR, and this young woman was obsessed with the books. Cue a generation down the line, who refer to the LOTR books as "the histories" and believe in it.

Actually, as a whole, the series is really quite good on exploring facets of human belief and the nature behind them. Christian kingdoms ranging from one that borrows from LOTR mixed with Arthurian legend to New Deseret of the Mormons, Pagan alliances, people trying to rebuild America, a resurgence of Native American tribes, etc.

At one point, one Queen makes Catholicism the official religion of her realm because she needs to keep the population docile and can invoke the divine right of kings/queens on the newer generation, but at the same time picks and chooses her battles with the Church carefully, because it's survived more empires than hers by being politically astute. When representatives from the Pope arrive from Europe, she ends up, for example, deposing her pet anti-Pope and bowing to central authority, knowing that in practice, as long as she's giving that lip service, she can keep running things however she wants.

Sounds interesting. I'll look it up.

'Murican Canadian
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