Welcome Mark Dreher
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29-08-2013, 01:52 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
(29-08-2013 01:27 AM)Rahn127 Wrote:  Sits on the right hand of god ?
Acts as the right hand of god when god wants to work one out ?
Does your face act as the throne 8 hours a day for god to sit on ?

That gives kissing ass a whole new meaning.
One person's heaven is another person's hell.
Puckered up on an asshole 8 hours a day doesn't sound like heaven to me.

To each his own





No, kissing God, is a wonderful thing.

It brings "a supernatural response", like profound euphoria.

i.e. like crack.

Or heroin.

Whatever, your euphoric poison, may be.

Of course, there is no hangover, with that.

Given the opportunity to try it, you would love it.

Believe me.

God is a dear

Who loves to cuddle.

And that occupies, a third, to a half, of her day.

Everyday.
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29-08-2013, 01:57 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
After today, your god will stop talking to you.
Every time you attempt to listen to the voice, you will hear nothing.
The connection will be severed.

This is god's will
Only god knows why this will happen, but it is upon you to accept it when it happens.
Do not question, but simply have faith that this is the way god wants it to be.

Insanity - doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results
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29-08-2013, 02:08 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
(29-08-2013 01:57 AM)Rahn127 Wrote:  After today, your god will stop talking to you.
Every time you attempt to listen to the voice, you will hear nothing.
The connection will be severed.

This is god's will
Only god knows why this will happen, but it is upon you to accept it when it happens.
Do not question, but simply have faith that this is the way god wants it to be.





God will stop talking to me

When I am dead.

God is a chatterbox.

And she enjoys, chattering, with me.

It is "fun", for her.

That's what a marriage partner, is for.

To talk to.

And to go through life with.

And God has one of those.
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29-08-2013, 02:24 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
That why your wife divorced your ass?
She wasn't into polygamy?

[Image: oscar.png]
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29-08-2013, 02:38 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
76 pages already?

Oh wow. Either he really is batshit crazy, or he's one hell of a dedicated troll.
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29-08-2013, 02:47 AM (This post was last modified: 29-08-2013 03:45 AM by Mark Dreher.)
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
(29-08-2013 02:24 AM)earmuffs Wrote:  That why your wife divorced your ass?
She wasn't into polygamy?






33 people were killed.

Just, to get me to divorce my human wife.

33 souls

Were lost.

It is not a funny subject.

That you bring up.

In fact, it is called

"The Virginia Tech Massacre".

The "largest mass murder, in US history".

First told, on the History Channel board, several years ago.

Here, is a reprint.

Quote.

"The Blacksburg Massacre" (Virginia Tech Massacre) the largest mass murder in US history - 33 dead April 16th 2007

(Note: This is a reprint of a History Channel blog post from Tuesday May 3, 2011)


"190 Pages and not one photo of Olga or the cameo?????"

Astounded!

How are you?

Long time no speak.

A halfway good Catholic.

Anyway, me and Olga agreed to divorce.

We agreed on April 16th 2007.

You see the Father wanted to get me "one on one".

A "lose the skirt" type of a deal.

But I was reluctant.

So on April 16, me and Olga were on the phone, I wanted to work things out, and she was half way agreed to come back.

Then the Father told me to check my homepage.

So I did.

And the Father had just started the Blacksburg massacre.

While I was on the phone.

And then God said to me "I want you to agree to divorce that woman or the Blacksburg massacre will keep going".

Well, I did not agree.

I hesitated, I hemmed, I hawed.

And the killings continued..

On and on, more and more, dead.

The number kept climbing.

Finally I could take it no longer.

I cracked.

And I agreed to divorce my wife and to enter into marriage with the "Shekinah" of God.

Right on the phone during the massacre.

And then the Blacksburg massacre ended.

But my minutes and my minutes

My delay.

Caused the largest mass murder in US history.

33 dead.

That is what happen to Olga.

And that is a true story.

Someone should find her and ask her.

I am not messing around.

This is a hard core mission.

End quote.

Thank you for asking.

About that.

http://www.thenewholybible.org/blacksburg_massacre.htm
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29-08-2013, 02:48 AM (This post was last modified: 29-08-2013 03:50 AM by Mark Dreher.)
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
(29-08-2013 02:38 AM)Vlad Wrote:  76 pages already?

Oh wow. Either he really is batshit crazy, or he's one hell of a dedicated troll.






Apocrypha.

Or "out of the bible writings".

Are important.

The bible, can be a little stuffy.

This, is more loose.

Where else, could you get God's opinion, on "Brazilian Bikini Waxes?"

Not in the bible.

The bible, is very official.

Well thought out.

And quite, unchangeable.

But, you know, there are minor issues

That people have questions on.

Always willing to help.
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29-08-2013, 04:48 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
(27-08-2013 10:36 AM)earmuffs Wrote:  Wait, did you just say homosexuality was optional?








I have no idea what homosexuality is.

But, it does not prevent you from Heaven.

And that, is really the only important thing.

The "common misconception", that homosexuals are screwed, as per God, is quite silly.

Ludicrous.

Any human, who routinely says grace

Goes to Heaven.

Any human

No matter what sin.
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29-08-2013, 04:50 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
How do small furry animals get to heaven?

Consider

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29-08-2013, 05:21 AM
RE: Welcome Mark Dreher
(29-08-2013 04:50 AM)DLJ Wrote:  How do small furry animals get to heaven?







There are animals in Heaven.

Heaven, is just like the earth.

However, your dog Fido

He does not go.

He rots, in the ground.

The animals in Heaven, are to provide comfort.

Just like your dog, and cat

Do on the earth.
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