What do I do?
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
10-05-2015, 08:09 PM
RE: What do I do?
(10-05-2015 07:55 PM)jennybee Wrote:  I heard a saying awhile ago (I don't remember who said it?) but it goes something like this: "You can only take people so far and then you have to leave them there." Meaning that you can only give people so much information and what they decide to do with it is up to them--you can't force anyone to change their minds. It seems like arguing with your mom is upsetting to both of you--so really there's no benefit to it. You're not changing your mind and she's not changing her mind. But, you can still be a voice of reason with your sisters. if you want to know what the Bible says in depth--get some scholarly books on the Bible (and not the ones written by *religious* theologians).

I agree with you but she definitely antagonizes or tries her best to start a debate...for example her dog has a genetic problem and gets ear infections constantly now after years of taking medication for it he seems to have gotten better...and you know what she says..."if it weren't for god my dog would still be suffering" I quickly lol'd and said "mom the medicine worked that's all!" there was no divine healing or miracle in this but she was determined to argue about it XD not only argue but poke at me until I had to respond. It baffles me! Even now I am sitting in a hospital bed with a dying kidney and many other medical issues and you're going to sit there and tell me thank god for such and such when her dogs ear was miraculously cured but I'm laying here in ICU lol how naive can someone be!
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
10-05-2015, 08:15 PM
RE: What do I do?
(10-05-2015 08:09 PM)LPMalakye Wrote:  
(10-05-2015 07:55 PM)jennybee Wrote:  I heard a saying awhile ago (I don't remember who said it?) but it goes something like this: "You can only take people so far and then you have to leave them there." Meaning that you can only give people so much information and what they decide to do with it is up to them--you can't force anyone to change their minds. It seems like arguing with your mom is upsetting to both of you--so really there's no benefit to it. You're not changing your mind and she's not changing her mind. But, you can still be a voice of reason with your sisters. if you want to know what the Bible says in depth--get some scholarly books on the Bible (and not the ones written by *religious* theologians).

I agree with you but she definitely antagonizes or tries her best to start a debate...for example her dog has a genetic problem and gets ear infections constantly now after years of taking medication for it he seems to have gotten better...and you know what she says..."if it weren't for god my dog would still be suffering" I quickly lol'd and said "mom the medicine worked that's all!" there was no divine healing or miracle in this but she was determined to argue about it XD not only argue but poke at me until I had to respond. It baffles me! Even now I am sitting in a hospital bed with a dying kidney and many other medical issues and you're going to sit there and tell me thank god for such and such when her dogs ear was miraculously cured but I'm laying here in ICU lol how naive can someone be!

I am sorry you're going through all of that. Don't let yourself get upset over nonsense. It's not that she is naive--it's that she really believes in a religion that she has been indoctrinated into. Religion is a powerful thing and it is really hard to untangle all of that in your mind and become free from all the crazy.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 2 users Like jennybee's post
10-05-2015, 11:15 PM
RE: What do I do?
That is indeed very true...just very hard to find a point where we don't argue about religion ....even though I try to avoid it entirely I'm still caught in the fire XD thank you for your kind words though I don't want pity...it just frustrates me that they think I should be thanking a god for nothing :/
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
10-05-2015, 11:22 PM
RE: What do I do?
(10-05-2015 11:15 PM)LPMalakye Wrote:  That is indeed very true...just very hard to find a point where we don't argue about religion ....even though I try to avoid it entirely I'm still caught in the fire XD thank you for your kind words though I don't want pity...it just frustrates me that they think I should be thanking a god for nothing :/

Yeah, I still have friends and family who are quite religious. They don't want to hear about anything that goes against God. So I just got to the point where I change the subject instead of debating them. As an ex-christian, I know how hard it is (when you are heavily involved in religion) to see a world without god in it--so I try and have compassion for them in that sense.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
11-05-2015, 01:42 PM
RE: What do I do?
I just wish I knew how to "deal" with them without causing problems. I am very opinionated and it's difficult for me to remain silent on many things. For example today my grandmother came in to see meant the hospital and what she said just made my jaw drop "mike I wish you would pray to god so you would get better" ....my response of course was not something she wanted to hear and after I realized I hurt her feelings I calmly said "you know where I stand with that mim and unless you wish to talk about it it's probably best to just leave it be." she nodded in silence and changed the subject but I could still see the pain and disappointment in her eyes. All I know is I lived in the closet for too long to go back there again...even if it means hurting the ones I love. I just can't live in a lie ya know
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
11-05-2015, 01:50 PM
RE: What do I do?
(11-05-2015 01:42 PM)LPMalakye Wrote:  I just wish I knew how to "deal" with them without causing problems. I am very opinionated and it's difficult for me to remain silent on many things. For example today my grandmother came in to see meant the hospital and what she said just made my jaw drop "mike I wish you would pray to god so you would get better" ....my response of course was not something she wanted to hear and after I realized I hurt her feelings I calmly said "you know where I stand with that mim and unless you wish to talk about it it's probably best to just leave it be." she nodded in silence and changed the subject but I could still see the pain and disappointment in her eyes. All I know is I lived in the closet for too long to go back there again...even if it means hurting the ones I love. I just can't live in a lie ya know

I hear ya. But I think your grandma just means well. If people say they want to pray for me, I just smile and say thank you. It would be the equivalent of them praying to a garden gnome. Since it means nothing and makes them feel better--I figure why not. It's not hurting me any. If she insists on your believing in god--just say something like I know you love and care about me, but you know where I stand on this..and then change the subject.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes jennybee's post
11-05-2015, 01:51 PM (This post was last modified: 11-05-2015 10:45 PM by Thumpalumpacus.)
RE: What do I do?
Be yourself and make no apologies. Those family members who cannot accept you for who you are aren't worth the pining. Write them off and cherish the ones who love you no matter what.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes Thumpalumpacus's post
Post Reply
Forum Jump: