What gender?
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26-04-2012, 03:37 PM
What gender?
Gender has always been interesting for me, and I am not talking about sexual organs.
I grew up in Germany > two official and accepted genders that are male and female
So that is the same in many countries.
And although I have been born with female genetalia I have never felt like a girl. So as a child, when I only had a picture of boy and girl, I wanted to be a boy. I played with boys a lot more, although I do have a female side, it just never showed a lot.
This mindset has not changed a lot. I still don't feel like a text book woman. Not at all! But of course I grew up and with me, my likes and dislikes.
I still like a lot of guy things like camping, knives, swords, revolvers, bikes, building stuff
But I do like a few girly things as well, painting, crafting, baking

For a long time this was really confusing for me.
I thought I wasn't normal, I wasn't behaving as I should as a girl, I hated a lot of girly things (make up, chit chat, teen stars, giggling over nothing...) and for that I had few girls as friends
But I also had few guys as friends because I did not like cars, soccer, showing off scars, or what not.
So at some point I though the only word that fits for me is asexual because this was the closest I got. although I liked sex... sounds weird... but yeah, that was the only thing that I thought could fit for me. of course I know now that i am not asexual and that this box is a completely different one that has nothing to do with gender / or at least not directly

Right now I am in a phase where I just say, I am who I am, and who cares if it has a name.
but
I am still curios if there is a "box" I fit in.
So I start researching.
So I read that Russia and Indonesia has 5 genders, I read that native americans from the pacific north west have 8 genders. And still out of all of these I find nothing that fits me...

i stumble across lacygreen's video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sHBAVjah...ure=relmfu
i stumble across a blog: http://www.myhusbandbetty.com/2009/07/09...e-genders/
and many more things.

dunno...
input?

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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26-04-2012, 03:58 PM
RE: What gender?
What is wrong with being a girl who doesn't like teen girl crap? How does that make you different? Who defines gender by what activities one likes, and for what purpose?

Here you would likely just be considered a tomboy. Which is just a girl who likes guy hanging out with guys and doing the activity's personified as being masculine.
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26-04-2012, 04:03 PM
RE: What gender?
@ mystic
With my adult brain I see nothing wrong with it, but back then I knew only girls who liked teen girl crap so this was what a girl should be like and I was not like that.
Who defines gender and for what purpose? Society does because they like to put people in boxes.
Tomboy sound ok to me, I guess...

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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26-04-2012, 04:20 PM
RE: What gender?
Personally, I find it awesome when I run into girls who play video game, which is often perceived as a masculine activity. Because I know there is a connection other than physical attraction there that a relationship can be built on. I hate finger nail polish, dancing, gossip, and other extremely feminine activities. I know a lot of guys, like myself, actually prefer girls that enjoy more masculine activities because we have more in common.
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26-04-2012, 04:23 PM
RE: What gender?
(26-04-2012 03:37 PM)Leela Wrote:  I still like a lot of guy things like camping, knives, swords, revolvers, bikes, building stuff
But I do like a few girly things as well, painting, crafting, baking.


Hmm.
Before Julia Child bullied her way in, women were not permitted into the greatest culinary school in France... much less graduated with and actual degree to become a chef.


Name 60- yes, 60 of the most famous painters in the history of the world. I'm going to bet the majority you name are men. Those girly, girly men. Wink

Juliet Lowe created the Girl Guides or what we call in the US, Girl Scouts... camping, anyone?

On the average, women on the firing range and in the field, rack up the most accurately targeted shots - something to do with nerves, so they say.

Building stuff... really? Me too. Heart I love to sew as well.
Check out Ana: http://ana-white.com -her site has some great plans for fantastic furniture.
BTW... Ana's working on "The Mom Project" -a duplex for her Mom and Mom-in-law... in Alaska, no less! The house from scratch is coming along very nicely.
______________

I think it's historically time for people to stop attaching gender roles to things, activities, and occupations. To me, it's always been an accepted perpetuation of sexism and it breeds resentment. I gave up sexually stereo type thinking long ago... probably when I first encountered it as a child and thought it confining, limiting, and absurd. It had nothing positive to offer me or my life.
_____________

Oh, did I ever mention ...?
Although I have a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree in Painting, I pay my bills and get my insurance paid by driving a big brown truck.
Among other things... I am a Teamster. Thumbsup

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
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26-04-2012, 04:32 PM
RE: What gender?
kim I loved this post! Thanks so much Smile Very positive and just great, I didn't look on it from that perspective

"Freedom is the freedom to say that 2+2=4" - George Orwell (in 1984)
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26-04-2012, 05:10 PM
RE: What gender?
asexual is not a gender, is a sexual orientation Wink

Gender goes from masculine/feminine to transgender. There are lots of different theories and ideas about gender today, some say all should be recognized officially some say official recognition of any gender is just wrong as the political power shouldn't invade such a personal sphere of the personality. I'm with the position of do whatever you like as long as it doesn't hurt anyone else. If you feel comfortable with your anatomy then enjoy it, if you want to change it then fight to do so, if you want to have sex (I'm stepping in another topic with this) with women do it if you want to have it with men do it, if both, do it, if you want to fuck a goat and the goat doesn't complain go ahead! no corpses though, that's just weird Tongue

I would recommend you to read some feminist books and some sexual diversity movement books also, queer theories are the ones that say you should be whatever you want without involvement of the state of any kind. Also Foucault wrote cool stuff about power and gender and how some powerful institutions (religion, politics and science) tend to normalize some genders and sexual orientations creating a hierarchy, which is of course arbitrary.

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26-04-2012, 05:33 PM
RE: What gender?
Who says you are supposed to like pink frilly stuff?

I quite identified with your post, much of it could be written by me too.

I never got confused at all by it though, I just went ahead and did what I wanted and didn't do what I didn't like.

I am very much a female, but I like wearing pants better than dresses, I like being an employer better than being employed, I have always liked boys better than girls and hung out with them.

So what?

Just live the way you like and don't worry about it.

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26-04-2012, 06:46 PM
RE: What gender?
I often wondered what, exactly, being female was supposed to be like? Though I am female, I don't care about fashion nor do I like amassing clothes. I don't like perfumes, make-up nor jewelry though I do have a couple of necklaces I wear occasionally.

I care nothing for celebrities or the various gossiping I see going on. I had no interest in dating and never had any boyfriends (or any friends, come to think of it).
I never felt that being female was anything special and really couldn't bring myself to see the biological processes that women go through as being anything other than what it basically is.

When I was little I played mostly with cars, trucks, action figures and when I was older I liked video games. I never felt the need to be offended over the fact that many heroes in games and movies were male..I just didn't care.

There were occasions when I wondered what being male would be like but then again what would I compare it to? I cannot ask a man to explain to me what being male is like anymore than I could explain what being female is like.

Anyways...I try not to think about these things because invariably whatever you do will be criticized by others. Female and male are just physical attributes and does not represent the entirety of the person.

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To obtain, something of equal value must be lost.
That is Alchemy's first law of Equivalent Exchange.
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26-04-2012, 07:10 PM
RE: What gender?
(26-04-2012 03:37 PM)Leela Wrote:  Gender has always been interesting for me, and I am not talking about sexual organs.
I grew up in Germany > two official and accepted genders that are male and female
So that is the same in many countries.
And although I have been born with female genetalia I have never felt like a girl. So as a child, when I only had a picture of boy and girl, I wanted to be a boy. I played with boys a lot more, although I do have a female side, it just never showed a lot.
This mindset has not changed a lot. I still don't feel like a text book woman. Not at all! But of course I grew up and with me, my likes and dislikes.
I still like a lot of guy things like camping, knives, swords, revolvers, bikes, building stuff
But I do like a few girly things as well, painting, crafting, baking

For a long time this was really confusing for me.
I thought I wasn't normal, I wasn't behaving as I should as a girl, I hated a lot of girly things (make up, chit chat, teen stars, giggling over nothing...) and for that I had few girls as friends
But I also had few guys as friends because I did not like cars, soccer, showing off scars, or what not.
So at some point I though the only word that fits for me is asexual because this was the closest I got. although I liked sex... sounds weird... but yeah, that was the only thing that I thought could fit for me. of course I know now that i am not asexual and that this box is a completely different one that has nothing to do with gender / or at least not directly

Right now I am in a phase where I just say, I am who I am, and who cares if it has a name.
but
I am still curios if there is a "box" I fit in.
So I start researching.
So I read that Russia and Indonesia has 5 genders, I read that native americans from the pacific north west have 8 genders. And still out of all of these I find nothing that fits me...

i stumble across lacygreen's video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sHBAVjah...ure=relmfu
i stumble across a blog: http://www.myhusbandbetty.com/2009/07/09...e-genders/
and many more things.

dunno...
input?
You don't need to fit in anyone's predefined category. You can be you.

I can think of many guys who would like your combination of interests. Some women, too.

Skepticism is not a position; it is an approach to claims.
Science is not a subject, but a method.
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