What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
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18-10-2017, 01:31 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 01:19 PM)Dark Wanderer Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 01:16 PM)The Organic Chemist Wrote:  I have you beat. I was known as the boyfriend sitter when I was at parties because I had absolutely no game. Hang out with me and you can rest assured that your bf won't cheat on you because I was a chick repellent. It was a bit of a joke in our circle but it really, really made my teenage years difficult and quite depressing. Sadcryface

You went to parties?

Gasp

Their girlfriends made me go. I was better protection against STD's than condoms.

"If we are honest—and scientists have to be—we must admit that religion is a jumble of false assertions, with no basis in reality.
The very idea of God is a product of the human imagination."
- Paul Dirac
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18-10-2017, 02:43 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 01:03 PM)jennybee Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 11:38 AM)yakherder Wrote:  And although I'm completely unsatisfied with my sex life, it isn't because of the overall count. I'd be perfectly happy with one person if sex were actually happening.

You have the body of Jason Statham, how is she not climbing you like a tree? Tongue But on a serious note, I do think attractivenss in a rship has little to do with actual sex. I find some of my friends very attractive and some of them say their sex life is meh. I think sometimes people tend to get comfortable in a rship and just stop having sex as often. This has happened in my rship on occasion as well. It sucks.

Spoilered because I don't want to throw your thread too far off track Big Grin

I think she just has zero sex drive. It just wasn't obvious when she was still trying to get pregnant which, unfortunately for me and my apparently super powered sperm, was a very short period of time. When I hear people talking about how they've been trying for months with no luck yet, I just wanna fling doodie at them out of jealousy. Due to the nature of our initial long distance relationship, made longer by a year in Afghanistan, about the only time we were having consistent sex was during our cross country drive from Nevada to Québec when I moved to Canada. By the time the move was finished, she was pregnant and lost interest. No problem, completely understandable. But her drive, if it ever existed in the first place, never came back. When she was ready for the 2nd, we had sex twice before she was pregnant again. And that accounts for two days of sex since moving to Canada in 2010 and my sex life in its entirety over the last decade.

The only time she's ever shown the slightest interest was when she needed my DNA. Now that she's finished with that, she's completely lost interest in me as anything other than a roommate she happens to have kids with. Even holding hands or sleeping in the same bed just feels awkward, like it's forced, on those rare occasions when it actually happens. Like she's only doing it to present an image to one of her friends or something or when we're camping (suburban style) and she doesn't want to have to explain to her parents why we feel the need to sleep separately in an RV with limited space.

At any rate... Though I occasionally bullshit myself into believing that maybe we can work things out, I don't realistically see it happening. I'm on the waiting list for a vasectomy in about a year and I have no intention of being sexually frustrated for the rest of my life. It's driving me insane. Beyond that the trick will be to find a way to move onto notch #3 without becoming a shitty father in the process.

I'd even go so far as to say that getting better at picking up on the subtle and sometimes not so subtle cues of girls hitting on me is making it even worse (okay, first world problem). Like, the opportunity is there if I want it. There's a girl that's been talking to (stalking Laugh out load ) me at the gym from time to time whom I would briefly describe as a very attractive, sexually frustrated mother of two very young children but without time for a real relationship. Recently she straight up asked me if I wanted to be her "post workout fuck buddy" (Is that even a thing, or did she just make it up on the spot? I mean I didn't know what a bed post notch was a few hours ago, so I'm still kind of naive) :/ I politely declined the offer, probably with a bright red face, because cheating just isn't my thing regardless of the status of my relationship. But inside I was asking myself "Who the fuck are you trying to impress? If you want to keep your family intact, at least as far as your kids are concerned, and not be going crazy the entire time, isn't this the way to do it?" But yeah... It's just not in me. So instead I'll go on as I have been, probably venting from time to time, raising my kids with my roommate without benefits while being in a monogamous relationship with my hand Heart

Anyway... I'm rambling off topic. I tend to do that when the subject comes up Hobo

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18-10-2017, 03:00 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 01:16 PM)The Organic Chemist Wrote:  I have you beat. I was known as the boyfriend sitter when I was at parties because I had absolutely no game. Hang out with me and you can rest assured that your bf won't cheat on you because I was a chick repellent. It was a bit of a joke in our circle but it really, really made my teenage years difficult and quite depressing. Sadcryface

It's okay OC; when I was in grad school, people would go to Eat N Park with me so they could pick up women. I was ugly enough to make anyone else look good, and literally every time I went there with another guy, a different waitress would flirt with whomever that guy was.

Need to think of a witty signature.
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18-10-2017, 03:03 PM (This post was last modified: 18-10-2017 03:07 PM by GirlyMan.)
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 03:00 PM)Shai Hulud Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 01:16 PM)The Organic Chemist Wrote:  I have you beat. I was known as the boyfriend sitter when I was at parties because I had absolutely no game. Hang out with me and you can rest assured that your bf won't cheat on you because I was a chick repellent. It was a bit of a joke in our circle but it really, really made my teenage years difficult and quite depressing. Sadcryface

It's okay OC; when I was in grad school, people would go to Eat N Park with me so they could pick up women. I was ugly enough to make anyone else look good, and literally every time I went there with another guy, a different waitress would flirt with whomever that guy was.

I constantly get hit on by gay men. Make of it what you will.

#sigh
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18-10-2017, 03:04 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 02:43 PM)yakherder Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 01:03 PM)jennybee Wrote:  You have the body of Jason Statham, how is she not climbing you like a tree? Tongue But on a serious note, I do think attractivenss in a rship has little to do with actual sex. I find some of my friends very attractive and some of them say their sex life is meh. I think sometimes people tend to get comfortable in a rship and just stop having sex as often. This has happened in my rship on occasion as well. It sucks.

Spoilered because I don't want to throw your thread too far off track Big Grin

I think she just has zero sex drive. It just wasn't obvious when she was still trying to get pregnant which, unfortunately for me and my apparently super powered sperm, was a very short period of time. When I hear people talking about how they've been trying for months with no luck yet, I just wanna fling doodie at them out of jealousy. Due to the nature of our initial long distance relationship, made longer by a year in Afghanistan, about the only time we were having consistent sex was during our cross country drive from Nevada to Québec when I moved to Canada. By the time the move was finished, she was pregnant and lost interest. No problem, completely understandable. But her drive, if it ever existed in the first place, never came back. When she was ready for the 2nd, we had sex twice before she was pregnant again. And that accounts for two days of sex since moving to Canada in 2010 and my sex life in its entirety over the last decade.

The only time she's ever shown the slightest interest was when she needed my DNA. Now that she's finished with that, she's completely lost interest in me as anything other than a roommate she happens to have kids with. Even holding hands or sleeping in the same bed just feels awkward, like it's forced, on those rare occasions when it actually happens. Like she's only doing it to present an image to one of her friends or something or when we're camping (suburban style) and she doesn't want to have to explain to her parents why we feel the need to sleep separately in an RV with limited space.

At any rate... Though I occasionally bullshit myself into believing that maybe we can work things out, I don't realistically see it happening. I'm on the waiting list for a vasectomy in about a year and I have no intention of being sexually frustrated for the rest of my life. It's driving me insane. Beyond that the trick will be to find a way to move onto notch #3 without becoming a shitty father in the process.

I'd even go so far as to say that getting better at picking up on the subtle and sometimes not so subtle cues of girls hitting on me is making it even worse (okay, first world problem). Like, the opportunity is there if I want it. There's a girl that's been talking to (stalking Laugh out load ) me at the gym from time to time whom I would briefly describe as a very attractive, sexually frustrated mother of two very young children but without time for a real relationship. Recently she straight up asked me if I wanted to be her "post workout fuck buddy" (Is that even a thing, or did she just make it up on the spot? I mean I didn't know what a bed post notch was a few hours ago, so I'm still kind of naive) :/ I politely declined the offer, probably with a bright red face, because cheating just isn't my thing regardless of the status of my relationship. But inside I was asking myself "Who the fuck are you trying to impress? If you want to keep your family intact, at least as far as your kids are concerned, and not be going crazy the entire time, isn't this the way to do it?" But yeah... It's just not in me. So instead I'll go on as I have been, probably venting from time to time, raising my kids with my roommate without benefits while being in a monogamous relationship with my hand Heart

Anyway... I'm rambling off topic. I tend to do that when the subject comes up Hobo

I think you're making the right move not cheating on her. I don't think cheating is ever the answer. I think if you (plural) are unhappy in a situation, best to leave first and then start something new. In my rship, I've had my struggles, we've been on and off, but together for most of the 12 years...and we are together again now. We've built a life together, so really hard to just walk away from that so I understand why you are staying...and you have kids so that makes things more complicated.

Anyway, I think our biggest source of fights in my rship is that we are just two different people. I never thought compatibility was important, but some days it seems very apparent how truly important it is. But I love him and he's a really good person and he's my best friend, so we work on it.

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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18-10-2017, 03:06 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 03:03 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 03:00 PM)Shai Hulud Wrote:  It's okay OC; when I was in grad school, people would go to Eat N Park with me so they could pick up women. I was ugly enough to make anyone else look good, and literally every time I went there with another guy, a different waitress would flirt with whomever that guy was.

I constantly get hit on by gay men. Make of it that what you will.

It's the fundoshi Tongue No one can escape its allure. Laugh out load

"Let the waters settle and you will see the moon and stars mirrored in your own being." -Rumi
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18-10-2017, 03:09 PM (This post was last modified: 18-10-2017 03:13 PM by Emma.)
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 10:05 AM)OakTree500 Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 10:00 AM)Gawdzilla Wrote:  There's an old saying, "You don't know if you're gay until you try it." I'm not gay. Utterly disinterested.
I think it's comedian Louis CK who says something about how a straight man could go his whole life saying "nope" but would never know he loves sucking dick Laugh out load

Some of us straight/bi non-op/pre-op trans girls are here to help you out with that. Wink

Not me though, I'm taken.

(18-10-2017 11:26 AM)RobbyPants Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 04:28 AM)jennybee Wrote:  This question came up in the Truth or Dare thread, so thought I'd throw it out to the forum. Since many of us are from ex-religious backgrounds and some are from religious backgrounds, how much do you feel that impacted or impacts your number? The other question we talked about in the T and D thread: Is there a certain bed post number you have in your head that you secretly judge someone for?

I'll go first:

My Bed Post number: 4

I don't think religion played any role in my number but I do think it played a role in my level of enjoyment during sex because afterward, I would feel so guilty for having sex before marriage.

My bed post number: 2

I was Christian when starting both relationships. With my ex-girlfriend (my first), I was always worried she'd get pregnant, and we both knew we didn't really want to get married to each other. So, we'd have sex, I'd get intensely worried, and we wouldn't for about a week. I don't remember religious guilt playing any role in this, oddly enough.

With my second (whom I eventually married), the religion came into it more. She was always more liberal, so she wasn't worried about sinning by having premarital sex. The problem was my last year of college was when I was first exposed to non-Christian viewpoints to a serious degree, and I found myself pushing back quite a bit, asserting my Christianity. So, there were a few periods of intense guilt where I'd want to stop having sex with her. This tended to lead to us doing some rather extreme foreplay, where we would each try to see how close we could get to see if the other would "initiate". It was so fucking weird, and she was rather sick of me putting us both through it.

Fucking sex guilt, man. Jesus ruins everything.

I'm not sure how much religion impacted my overall number. I'd always planned on getting married, so, the fact that I settled into a long-term relationship in my late teens was kind of expected. If I found myself divorced, I'd be open for some more experimentation and be fine with one-night-stands, but I'm not sure how it'd actually play out.

I hear you on the sex guilt. It caused quite a strain on my wife and I early relationship. It fucking sucked. I'm glad I'm past that shit now.
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18-10-2017, 03:43 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 04:28 AM)jennybee Wrote:  This question came up in the Truth or Dare thread, so thought I'd throw it out to the forum. Since many of us are from ex-religious backgrounds and some are from religious backgrounds, how much do you feel that impacted or impacts your number? The other question we talked about in the T and D thread: Is there a certain bed post number you have in your head that you secretly judge someone for?

I'll go first:

My Bed Post number: 4

I don't think religion played any role in my number but I do think it played a role in my level of enjoyment during sex because afterward, I would feel so guilty for having sex before marriage.

I don't have a number that I would secretly judge someone for because we get one life and I think each person should do what makes them happy. That said, I personally prefer if the person I'm with hasn't been with a ton of people. I'm not into one night stands or fuck friends and I'm picky about who I sleep with, so I'm hoping the guy I'm with would be that way too.

Even though I like to joke around about sex, it's something I save for a long term relationship with someone I'm in love with and who's my best friend. This isn't religious based either. I just like to be in love and trust someone completely when I get it on, I just feel it makes the sex better, imo.
You're a fallen woman, is my first reaction!

But, I do wonder. I wonder how you could make the final man you meet feel special? When you've given yourself to others? (serious question). I suppose you have to convince him I guess.

I know this isn't 'modern', but speaking to you as a man, I want no one to have ever had my woman! I'm very possessive in that regards, and, I question her sincerity otherwise. It's not PC but I expect a lot from a woman when it comes to chastity.

Thank you (I think) for sharing. Well, I didn't really want to know haha, but I read it, so, I dunno, I hope you settle down eventually.

I used to sleep around before I was saved, so none of us are perfect unfortunately.

Cheers! Smile
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18-10-2017, 03:46 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
(18-10-2017 03:43 PM)Eagle Wrote:  
(18-10-2017 04:28 AM)jennybee Wrote:  This question came up in the Truth or Dare thread, so thought I'd throw it out to the forum. Since many of us are from ex-religious backgrounds and some are from religious backgrounds, how much do you feel that impacted or impacts your number? The other question we talked about in the T and D thread: Is there a certain bed post number you have in your head that you secretly judge someone for?

I'll go first:

My Bed Post number: 4

I don't think religion played any role in my number but I do think it played a role in my level of enjoyment during sex because afterward, I would feel so guilty for having sex before marriage.

I don't have a number that I would secretly judge someone for because we get one life and I think each person should do what makes them happy. That said, I personally prefer if the person I'm with hasn't been with a ton of people. I'm not into one night stands or fuck friends and I'm picky about who I sleep with, so I'm hoping the guy I'm with would be that way too.

Even though I like to joke around about sex, it's something I save for a long term relationship with someone I'm in love with and who's my best friend. This isn't religious based either. I just like to be in love and trust someone completely when I get it on, I just feel it makes the sex better, imo.
You're a fallen woman, is my first reaction!

But, I do wonder. I wonder how you could make the final man you meet feel special? When you've given yourself to others? (serious question). I suppose you have to convince him I guess.

I know this isn't 'modern', but speaking to you as a man, I want no one to have ever had my woman! I'm very possessive in that regards, and, I question her sincerity otherwise. It's not PC but I expect a lot from a woman when it comes to chastity.

Thank you (I think) for sharing. Well, I didn't really want to know haha, but I read it, so, I dunno, I hope you settle down eventually.

I used to sleep around before I was saved, so none of us are perfect unfortunately.

Cheers! Smile

I know it's wrong, and Jesus wouldn't like it, but I'm kind of glad you're going to Hell.

#sigh
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18-10-2017, 03:48 PM
RE: What is your Bed Post Notch Number?
0,no,don't care.

"If you keep trying to better yourself that's enough for me. We don't decide which hand we are dealt in life, but we make the decision to play it or fold it" - Nishi Karano Kaze
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