What is your biggest regret?
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01-12-2011, 02:50 PM
 
What is your biggest regret?
We all make mistakes. We all miss opportunities. We all say things that we wish we never said.

Sometime we can make up for it, apologize, write some wrongs.

Sometime, however, it is too late. The person we hurt may not be alive any more, may not be anywhere to be found. Then we have to cope with the knowledge that we are not perfect.

Some of these memories can go real deep and hurt like hell, when we realize that we can’t turn to clock back.

My biggest regret is not being there when my mother needed me most. My excuse was the distance of an ocean in between. She gave me so much that can never be repaid – and I didn’t. I did what I could from here, but it wasn’t enough. Now she is gone and I don’t even have the consolation of a theist of making up to her in heaven.

So what am I doing?

I am living with it, trying to be that much nicer for everyone I can reach.

Small consolation.

So, what is your biggest regret, if you care to talk about it?

If not, I understand – I needed 3 shots of Scotch before I could.
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01-12-2011, 04:13 PM
RE: What is your biggest regret?
I'm sorry Zatamon, that must be very difficult. Sad I personally haven't had to deal with the grief of losing a loved one. But I can imagine that it would be devastating.

I don't have any regrets that heavy. I regret not going to college after high school. There's that. But I ultimately ended up meeting my wife because of the choices I made, so ultimately I am happy. But still, I don't like knowing that there's a level of judgement that I don't have much in the way of higher education (even if that judgement is only my own). Instead I went to what amounts to a seminary. It feels like it was mostly a pitiful waste of my time. I did meat a lot of cool people and got to travel the country a lot and the world a bit, so I have my experiences and memories. And ultimately, that's what I will have with me hopefully until I die- memories and experiences.
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01-12-2011, 06:27 PM (This post was last modified: 01-12-2011 08:48 PM by defacto7.)
RE: What is your biggest regret?
My greatest regret....

having a rep of 4 and deserving it.

time to go....

-----------
To recovering theists....

Note the following philosophical addendum:

Doing "good" is NOT always the righteous thing to do. Being "good" can never be the default position. Reason must include both possibilities.

Who can turn skies back and begin again?
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01-12-2011, 06:37 PM
RE: What is your biggest regret?
Like guilt, shame, intolerance, impatience, despair, desperation, and a shitload of other negative and/or counterproductive emotions, regret is not allowed in my club. I will not permit myself to experience it. No good can come of it.

My one exception is remorse, which could have legal implications when it comes to sentencing. But only then. Wink

As it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
I will show you fear in a handful of dust.
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01-12-2011, 08:15 PM
RE: What is your biggest regret?
(01-12-2011 06:37 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  Like guilt, shame, intolerance, impatience, despair, desperation, and a shitload of other negative and/or counterproductive emotions, regret is not allowed in my club. I will not permit myself to experience it. No good can come of it.

I've heard people say this and I marvel at it. How does one do this? I can tell myself that I will allow no regrets, but unfortunately I have not found the switch that turns certain memories off. Any hints as to the process, or is this just one of those things that you can do innately and I cannot?

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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01-12-2011, 08:21 PM
 
RE: What is your biggest regret?
(01-12-2011 06:37 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  My one exception is remorse, which could have legal implications when it comes to sentencing. But only then. Wink

If by 'remorse' you mean you wish that you had not done something you did or, you wish you had done something you didn't, then we are talking about the same thing.

If it is coupled with the desire to make corrections, if possible, then we are, indeed, on the same page.
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01-12-2011, 08:34 PM
RE: What is your biggest regret?
Currently my biggest regret (I don`t usually suffer from regret as I won`t allow myself too, but ugh, this is my exception) is having convinced my wife that we should move to another city that offered more schools and had more jobs.

So as it turns out I was lied to by a member of my own family. There were NO jobs. Lots of schools though. Crackheads too. Life savings gone, credit piled high, phone shut off, moved in with the inlaws. The mennonite inlaws. Life has taken a very negative turn for me and my little family. All from one poor choice, that at the time seemed like the best one.

"I think of myself as an intelligent, sensitive human being with the soul of a clown which always forces me to blow it at the most important moments." -Jim Morrison
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01-12-2011, 09:05 PM
RE: What is your biggest regret?
(01-12-2011 08:34 PM)lucradis Wrote:  The mennonite inlaws. Life has taken a very negative turn for me and my little family. All from one poor choice, that at the time seemed like the best one.

Dude, for what it's worth, I can feel a bit of your pain with making a move to a different state that didn't turn out as promised.
But look at the bright side. Being with the Mennonites you'll never have to worry about being drafted into the army.

It was just a fucking apple man, we're sorry okay? Please stop the madness Laugh out load
~Izel
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01-12-2011, 10:43 PM
RE: What is your biggest regret?
(01-12-2011 08:15 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  
(01-12-2011 06:37 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  Like guilt, shame, intolerance, impatience, despair, desperation, and a shitload of other negative and/or counterproductive emotions, regret is not allowed in my club. I will not permit myself to experience it. No good can come of it.

I've heard people say this and I marvel at it. How does one do this?

How does one not do that?

As it was in the beginning is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.
And I will show you something different from either
Your shadow at morning striding behind you
Or your shadow at evening rising to meet you;
I will show you fear in a handful of dust.
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03-12-2011, 10:43 AM
RE: What is your biggest regret?
(01-12-2011 08:15 PM)Erxomai Wrote:  
(01-12-2011 06:37 PM)GirlyMan Wrote:  Like guilt, shame, intolerance, impatience, despair, desperation, and a shitload of other negative and/or counterproductive emotions, regret is not allowed in my club. I will not permit myself to experience it. No good can come of it.

I've heard people say this and I marvel at it. How does one do this? I can tell myself that I will allow no regrets, but unfortunately I have not found the switch that turns certain memories off. Any hints as to the process, or is this just one of those things that you can do innately and I cannot?

You just have to reclassify it as a learning curve and drop it in the “shit not to repeat” file.
You can’t go through life kicking yourself for what may have been.

A casual stroll through the lunatic asylum shows that faith does not prove anything. Friedrich Nietzsche
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