What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
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13-11-2013, 09:53 PM
What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
I'm planning on coming out as an Atheist to my parents. My mother is a Christian, and my father is a Catholic. My sister is an Atheist as well, but my parents don't know that either of us are godless heathens. I'm finishing up with my education and am looking for employment. But I feel like being a closet Atheist is defeating the purpose, I really don't like religion, and I want to openly speak my mind about it. But I don't know what term to use, I feel that the word "Atheist" will feel too extreme to my parents. So I've been looking for a different way to say it. I'm worried I might be forced to go to a church or something if I use the wrong words. I really don't know how to say that I'm an Atheist. I've been dropping hints, about the immorality of the Bible and how it's not historically or scientifically correct. But they just tell me that the Bible never says those immoral things, they've never read it Shocking. So, I really don't know what term to use, should I just say "Atheist"?.
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13-11-2013, 10:28 PM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
Finish your education, get a job. Once you are supporting yourself and are an adult living as an adult then you should will be in a better position to speak up. A lot of people here have been turned away by family and friends when they came out, you have to be ready to that possibility.

I'm not anti-social. I'm pro-solitude. Sleepy
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13-11-2013, 10:41 PM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
It sounds like you should have them sit down and read the bible with you. And then ask them those questions about how it doesn't make sense.

And what Anjele said.

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13-11-2013, 11:30 PM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
What Anj said. Once you've done all those things (finish education, get a job, place to live on your own) then sure you can disassociate and eventually admit it. I wouid only do it tho if the subject comes up.

I always ask people when they say they want to come out but are unsure how...
I assume you're in college so I'll skip age (but if you say your in high school I might lose it)
Why is it so important that your parents know?
Will it hurt your parents to know you're atheist?
Extended family reactions count, how will it be when grandparents, aunts, uncles, find out?

All too often people are cut off when they come out, they forget how other people will react to it.

You don't have to answer me...these are just to think about.

Hug good luck in whatever you decide.


God is a concept by which we measure our pain -- John Lennon

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14-11-2013, 12:30 AM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
I'm going to guess that you wouldn't be comfortable with "FUCK JESUS!"

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14-11-2013, 04:02 AM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
'Atheist' does carry negative connotations to a lot of religious folks, especially fundamentalist Christians. There are a few ways of doing things. You could say "I am an Atheist" and then explain to them what an atheist really is and what impact it has on you as a person. You could soften the blow by using terms like 'non-believer', 'free-thinker', 'non-theist', etc. It's your call, just giving you a few options.

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14-11-2013, 04:17 AM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
What DL said.

Free-thinker is the safe term in SE Asia... no one gets offended that you are expressing doubt.

Of course, you could go for SATANIST and have done with it!

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14-11-2013, 07:11 AM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
I'll +1 pretty much all of the advice in this thread - don't come out unless you feel safe in doing so, especially financially safe - and think about softening your terms. Here is a bit of an off the cuff hierarchy of possible words or phrases that might help you.
1. questioning, searching, finding yourself, exploring your spirituality, considering other options
2. agnostic, unsure, uncommitted, taking a break
3. non-christian, non-believer, sceptic, humanist
4. atheist

I can't say for sure, but it might be easier on those who are hearing your message to be further up that scale. That said, you don't want to give them false hopes. Matt Dillahunty tells people who want to save him to get together and pray that whatever it would take for god to convince him that god exists, that god would do that... which lets the people in his life off the hook a little I guess.

Give me your argument in the form of a published paper, and then we can start to talk.
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14-11-2013, 08:37 AM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
(14-11-2013 04:17 AM)DLJ Wrote:  What DL said.

Free-thinker is the safe term in SE Asia... no one gets offended that you are expressing doubt.

Of course, you could go for SATANIST and have done with it!

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Now that one was funnyThumbsup.
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14-11-2013, 09:08 AM
RE: What wording should I use when coming out as an Atheist?
I think I would begin with an adjustment to my own self image. You proclaim yourself to be an atheist, but describe yourself as "a godless heathen." I believe you were kidding.
So...perhaps begin with a description of yourself as a "religious critical thinker" or "a logical religious person". And I agree with one of the posters....it is tough to go against the "family" stance on anything....particularly religion. Therefore, get your education both formal and informal; achieve your independence. Then, if the subject comes up...go ahead and declare yourself!

"People don't go to heaven when they die; they're taken to a special room and burned!" Evil_monster
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