Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
Post Reply
 
Thread Rating:
  • 0 Votes - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
13-02-2012, 02:07 PM
Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
I couldn't really find a good place for this, so I put it here. I was hoping some of (mostly, those of you who are married, but everyone is welcome to add) would give me some insight here.

So, I'm 28, not quite at that age where everyone I knew at school is getting married, but pretty close. My mother for one is dropping those hints, and it's not as subtle as she thinks. Tongue

Is there really a reason to get married any more? I have been together with the monster for about four years now but marriage never struck us as necessary. I was doing some random reading and I stumbled upon this blog of dubious authorship that seems to claim the only reason to get married these days is a religious one. So naturally I rushed here to share this with some married atheists and ask their opinions.

If you are married, could you share your reasons (if it's not too personal). If you're not, your general opinion on the subject?
And finally, should I get married? Tongue

"But the point is, find somebody to love. Everything else is overrated." - HouseofCantor
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-02-2012, 02:10 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
I'm disqualified from this thread.

[Image: dog-shaking.gif]
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-02-2012, 02:11 PM (This post was last modified: 13-02-2012 02:12 PM by germanyt.)
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
At the time I got married I felt it had a symbolic meaning. I realize now that a symbolic marriage is really not necessary. You can have the same relationship regardless. But legally and financially we benefit from being married. I suppose that is sort of discriminatory to the non married. I guess the idea economically and socially is to reinforce the family unit.
(13-02-2012 02:10 PM)kingschosen Wrote:  I'm disqualified from this thread.

Not exactly. Being married doesn't make you more Christian. So you could set the religious aspect aside.

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.”

-Mark Twain
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes germanyt's post
13-02-2012, 02:15 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
Our marriage was purely a celebration. A great reason to eat good food and party around a bonfire with friends and family. The reason we actually got legally married was purely for the financial benefit.

I've always been of the opinion that I don't need a government issued document telling me who I love. On the other hand, if telling the government who I love means I can financially benefit, then why the hell not??

So many cats, so few good recipes.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 3 users Like Stark Raving's post
13-02-2012, 02:19 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
Just occured to me that Christians shouldn't get married at all. With divorce being a sin and chances of it at 50%, why would they risk it?

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.”

-Mark Twain
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes germanyt's post
13-02-2012, 02:19 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
Well, speaking as a military member, marriage is the only way for my wife to get any/all the benefits a military spouse can get. Like, living in on-base housing, 100% medical coverage, my life insurance, permitted to move around the world with me, etc etc.

Not that I'm saying that's the only reason I got married... but it's a very important one.

(Off-topic: Kinda why legal gay marriage in the military has been so important -- although they still aren't getting all those important benefits they deserve. Pretty frustrating stuff. )
Visit this user's website Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-02-2012, 02:30 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
No real reason to marry unless one of you needs to be on the other's insurance or you want to get some kind of tax break. Not that you will but, if you split up, you each will have money issues to deal with. Money is a bad thing to deal with in any relationship, so always be mindful of it.

Marrying is ok if it is what you both want... if there is a time that is right, you will know that time.

If your gal is asking about marriage but you don't want things to change... then chances are, something's not right and marrying won't fix it. Talk it over with her.

Just stay together if that is what you want to do - ignore family - it's your relationship, not theirs.

But don't be afraid to take that chance to commit, if it's the natural course you find yourselves on. Sometimes, that commitment is the only reason some people actually work things out.

A new type of thinking is essential if mankind is to survive and move to higher levels. ~ Albert Einstein
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes kim's post
13-02-2012, 02:45 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
Yeah, religion is actually one of the last reasons to get married in my opinion.

There are insurance and financial reasons to get married.

More importantly, as a way of nurturing the bond between you and your SO.

There is also the issue of security. A person feels more secure when they know their SO is committed to sticking with them through thick and thin. If you've been with someone for twenty years you've invested in each other, and probably made some serious life-altering concessions to make the relationship work and you may depend on each other greatly. Marriage is a way of feeling more certain that this will not be abandoned, leaving you or your SO in a boat without a motor later in life. It's no guarantee, of course, and it's not absolutely necessary for a relationship to work, but it can help.

There are tax benefits. There are benefits if you SO is in the hospital.

Those are a few other reasons. But religion and societal expectations are small reasons in my book.
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
[+] 1 user Likes kineo's post
13-02-2012, 02:50 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
(13-02-2012 02:45 PM)kineo Wrote:  Yeah, religion is actually one of the last reasons to get married in my opinion.

There are insurance and financial reasons to get married.

More importantly, as a way of nurturing the bond between you and your SO.

There is also the issue of security. A person feels more secure when they know their SO is committed to sticking with them through thick and thin. If you've been with someone for twenty years you've invested in each other, and probably made some serious life-altering concessions to make the relationship work and you may depend on each other greatly. Marriage is a way of feeling more certain that this will not be abandoned, leaving you or your SO in a boat without a motor later in life. It's no guarantee, of course, and it's not absolutely necessary for a relationship to work, but it can help.

There are tax benefits. There are benefits if you SO is in the hospital.

Those are a few other reasons. But religion and societal expectations are small reasons in my book.


I hate to call it a legit reason because it really isn't. But aside from financially they only legit reason to get married is religious. So that you don't have illigitamate children.

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it's time to pause and reflect.”

-Mark Twain
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
13-02-2012, 02:54 PM
RE: Why Get Married? (A nosy question)
Well...

The only legal way I can get divorced is through adultery, spousal abuse, or prison.

But, besides religious reasons, I think marriage is an outward sign of commitment towards your wife/husband.

[Image: dog-shaking.gif]
Find all posts by this user
Like Post Quote this message in a reply
Post Reply
Forum Jump: