Why I am Jesus Christ
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26-11-2013, 11:49 PM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ | ||||
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27-11-2013, 02:35 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
You're clearly taking those scriptures out of context..
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27-11-2013, 03:21 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
Claiming to be Jesus will only get you tortured and nailed to a cross again.
But hey, I'm willing if you are ![]() Insanity - doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results |
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27-11-2013, 03:46 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
(27-11-2013 03:21 AM)Rahn127 Wrote: Claiming to be Jesus will only get you tortured and nailed to a cross again. It's dangerous to go alone, take this! ![]() |
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27-11-2013, 03:51 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
hmm, jokes about virginity of mother.. check, jokes about hanging out with men.. check, Jokes about beastiality.. check, I see nailing jokes has been done, hmmm.. where should i start?
I thought the second coming of christ was about how he impregnated Mary Magdalene.. |
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27-11-2013, 04:53 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
(26-11-2013 05:49 PM)ALMASSAH Wrote: I am Jesus, he who takes away the sins of the world! You too huh? Welcome to the forum, Jesus! Please save me! I have sinned! I have no doubt you are Him! Also, I have a case of water in my basement, I'm running low on bread, and only have a few cans of tuna left. If you could help a brother in Christ out it would surely be appreciated. Amen! |
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27-11-2013, 05:03 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
Give a man a can of tuna, he will eat for a day, turn his water into wine and he will die of dehydration or alcohol poisoning.
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27-11-2013, 05:08 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
(27-11-2013 05:03 AM)PursuingTruth Wrote: Give a man a can of tuna, he will eat for a day, turn his water into wine and he will die of dehydration or alcohol poisoning. He didn't have a problem with it before. Not cool, man. Not cool. Besides, even if I did... ![]() |
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27-11-2013, 05:19 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
You know what, I am going to apologize for any rude statements I said in this thread.
Almassah, I believe you. You are the wisest one here, the strongest, the bravest. That is why I ask you to delve deep inside me. Almassah, reading your posts awokened a fire inside me that until now, only pornography could light. That is why I must be with you, and even if I cannot be your Mary Magdalene (which I am a reincarnation of btw) then I at least want to help ease any stress you have facing the atheist crowds. DemonicLemon <3 Almassah |
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27-11-2013, 05:51 AM
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RE: Why I am Jesus Christ
(26-11-2013 07:36 PM)Vosur Wrote: Please wait in line with all the other incarnations of Christ. They're all Christ. Don't you know? Quote:“Look, he is coming with the clouds,”Every eye will see him. Don't you see? God hasn't figured out this TV or Internet thingy yet, so he just sent a bunch of guys so you wouldn't have to drive very far. Give me your argument in the form of a published paper, and then we can start to talk. |
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