Why are Christians sad about death?
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02-07-2015, 03:04 PM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
Some Christians claim their beliefs will help them face death. Yet more often than not, when people are dying or bereaved, they realise how utterly hollow and disappointing Jesus’ empty promises about an afterlife really are.

I have looked after many Christians as they are dying, and they rarely talk about Jesus.
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03-07-2015, 06:33 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
(02-07-2015 10:18 AM)Dom Wrote:  The physical reaction is not the only reaction, but when the person has been a constant presence in your life at the time of death, it is the one that will dominate your life daily for some time.

If the death was violent or you were a care taker, PTSD and/or disturbing dreams are added to the mix.

If neither apply, but the person was a prominent figure in your life, you will still have the withdrawal symptoms. But predominantly you will experience melancholy triggered by memories, something that enters into the equation much later for people who experience real time withdrawal.

This is just my observations plus a bunch of reading of everything I could get my hands on when I realized that I was 'out of control", i.e. grief took charge of my life at whim it seemed. I joined groups and talked to a lot of people, too, trying to figure out wtf was going on. I found that pretty much everyone goes through the same things, but often not in the same sequence. I didn't see any difference between the religious and the non religious.

Certainly people go through the same things when they lose someone, I'm just wondering how they justify it in their minds.

"Why are you sad?" would be a silly question for someone who has just had a loved one die, mostly because we know what the reasons are and that they have to do with the absence of the person and the whole situation being unfair.
I'm just wondering, since Christians kind of "lack" these reasons, how do they figure it out in their heads without entailing any doubt?

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03-07-2015, 06:38 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
(02-07-2015 08:16 AM)undergroundp Wrote:  No, seriously.

If you were 100% certain that your dead loved one was in a better, perfect place, where he'd feel no more pain and sadness and you'd certainly see him again, then why the fuck should you be sad? Pretty selfish, right?

Well, for the fundies and some weird-ass denominations, there's an explanation: they fear their loved one might be heading straight to hell. But I think we all agree that your average Christian can't possibly believe that his beloved friends and family could ever go to hell, that place is for people like Hitler and murderers, right?

So anyway, to me, this translates as "I'm actually not really sure about heaven", which could also mean "I'm not really sure about my religion". Which is very hopeful if you ask me.

Like the others said, they really don't buy it. I mean really.
" 'Eternal rest' grant unto them" ? Really. Sleep forever ?
What does that mean ? It means "dead is dead". They just don't like to say it.
Rolleyes

Insufferable know-it-all.Einstein God has a plan for us. Please stop screwing it up with your prayers.
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03-07-2015, 07:18 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
It does demonstrate there clearly is good reasonable doubt among people.

Otherwise why not act entirely differently.



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03-07-2015, 09:40 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
(02-07-2015 08:43 AM)Dom Wrote:  Because grief has little to do with the deceased.

Grief is primarily a physical reaction. Whenever the grieving party encounters a situation that lacks the expected presence/involvement of the deceased, it triggers tension, something is profoundly different. This in turn triggers tears and the release of calming compounds.

Grief is not about the deceased, it's all about the survivor having to adapt to the absence of expected input.

Exactly. I've said for a very long time that funerals are not for the dead, they're for the living. When you lose a loved one, it's you that has to adapt.
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03-07-2015, 09:47 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
Many years ago my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer. If I knew for sure, no doubts, that she was going to go to a place that was scientifically proven to exist where she would be doing all the fun things she enjoyed, the New York Times crossword puzzle, oil painting, taking her dog for a walk, cursing Republicans, reading books late into the night, writing poetry, etc. I wouldn't have been at all sad when she died. Not one bit.

But I knew that was a bunch of hooey so when she died I mourned. We were very close. But I was very happy that she lived the life she did and passed onto me many words of wisdom, her sense of humor, book reading and I've kept the legacy of cursing Republicans alive and well too. Big Grin

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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05-07-2015, 09:54 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
I was at a funeral once for a man in his early 70s that died from cancer. His entire family was very happy and upbeat because, "Dad's with Jesus now." Even his wife of over 50 years would not accept any sympathy. It was the creepiest thing I had ever seen. This was less than a year after my son died and I knew what a hole there was in my heart. I thought it was sad that they would not let themselves deal with their own emotions almost as if that were sinful.
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05-07-2015, 10:07 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
I rather dislike the term "passed on" when referring to people dying. Passing on infers that they went someplace, like passing through a door from one place to another. My mother didn't pass on, she died and doesn't exist anymore. She isn't actually anywhere. Her energy rearranged itself in the cosmos.

Shakespeare's Comedy of Errors.... on Donald J. Trump:

He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere,
Ill-fac’d, worse bodied, shapeless every where;
Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind,
Stigmatical in making, worse in mind.
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05-07-2015, 10:15 AM
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
Full o crap, selfish, or both?

I give up! Which one is it? Tongue

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05-07-2015, 11:53 AM (This post was last modified: 05-07-2015 12:13 PM by SunnyD1.)
RE: Why are Christians sad about death?
Ian McEwan said something relating to this, along the lines of; "when you see your loved one's on a ship, and it's setting sail, you don't cry because you know (or it's probably the case) that you're going to see them again. So why don't religious people smile and act the same way when a loved one passes, if the separation is only temporary?"

Saints live in flames; wise men, next to them.
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