Why aren't children treated like Adults?
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20-03-2012, 01:06 AM
Why aren't children treated like Adults?
Withholding information to me is the equivalent of lying, treating others differently than you do others is a form of prejudice. If kids were treated like an adult I think they'd grow up much quicker, more mature, and most importantly more intelligent.

And yet I hear cry baby wanna be mothers who haven't even developed the god damned responsibility to spank their children? Are you fucking shitting me? Do you know why we spank children? To teach them a serious lesson, if they're caught stealing when they grow up, it'll be more than 'just sit in the corner' because the corner they'll be sitting in will be in jail. If they murder somebody well hell that's not t bad because they're gonna get off scout free anyways with this gay little legal system that lawyers love to use as lubricant to fuck others in the ass and then steal their money.

But that's besides the point, people need to have a little bit of responsibility in this world, it would go a LOOONG ways.

Your thoughts?
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20-03-2012, 01:14 AM
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
I doubt that I will spank my kids. It's not in my nature.

And now, I bring you your daily dose of snark:
Why would you ever feel the need to spank a kid? You think a 3 year old or 5 year old or 7 year old can stand up to you? Would you beat your dog to teach it things? What makes you think doing it to a kid will improve their understanding?

When they get to being adult, that's when you can treat 'em like an adult Blush
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20-03-2012, 01:50 AM (This post was last modified: 20-03-2012 01:55 AM by TheArcticSage.)
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
(20-03-2012 01:14 AM)morondog Wrote:  I doubt that I will spank my kids. It's not in my nature.

And now, I bring you your daily dose of snark:
Why would you ever feel the need to spank a kid? You think a 3 year old or 5 year old or 7 year old can stand up to you? Would you beat your dog to teach it things? What makes you think doing it to a kid will improve their understanding?

When they get to being adult, that's when you can treat 'em like an adult Blush

A 3,5,7 year old aren't supposed to stand up to you, they're supposed to learn lessons from you, and it's your responsibility to make sure those lessons hit home... if you're not going to be responsible then don't have kids. If a dog bit me I'd probably bite it back, if it was a big dog I'd probably kick it.

If a bee was flying close to you and you were near it's nest with the intent to steal honey from it, do you think it would ask you kindly to stop? No it's going to sting you, and you're going to remember it stung you. That's a spanking, it's a little sting it's not like your beating the little shithead until his entire body is purple. They'll get over that sting, they'll be the same probably around 20 minutes except they'll remember that sting, and they'll know not to do it again.

I don't think we should wait for them to 'become adults' because I believe they're already adults as soon as they leave that womb. Now am I going to spank a baby? No. Am I going to spank a 3 year old? Probably not. Am I going to spank a 5 year old? Yes I am. Because then they can really start remembering things, and the lessons begin.

However treating them like an adult has a lot more to do than just spanking them, it means giving them answers to the best of your abilities, teaching them things that they should know. Lying to them about nothing... unless the lie is itself a lesson for them to learn from. It's quite understandable that if you're always truthful with them they might think everyone's truthful, and that's NOT a good way to think.

NOR do I think we should treat them differently just because of their gender, in fact I would love to see some more women with intellect and maturity. The way girls are... today... little pruny, sassy, ignorant, immature, I HATE THEM, I don't hate women but god damn I hate immaturity and ignorance as much as I hate inequality. Not as much as I hate rapists though... nothing can top my hatred for rapists. Nonetheless, we treat them equally and you'll have yourself a fine human being.
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20-03-2012, 01:57 AM (This post was last modified: 20-03-2012 02:01 AM by nach_in.)
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
I agree that we treat children like if they weren't humans, I wouldn't spank my dog, but my dog is less likely to go around an kill people if it misbehaves. On the other hand, every kid is a cosmos, so we can't lay down too specific rules on how to treat them, abuse is of course too much, but some times kids need a spank, one, make it hurt a bit, and make them feel ashamed so they understand the consequences of their actions, some other kids born more evolved Tongue

I forgot, about talking to them as adults, in some things it may be cool, but some things need to be lowered down a bit so they understand stuff in a progressive way, I wouldn't be showing a kid some hardcore porn to teach him about sex, but explaining I wouldn't give him the stork version of it either Tongue

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20-03-2012, 02:57 AM
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
We don't treat children like adults because they aren't adults. They can't understand and react like adults because they are still learning. We as adults are in charge of teaching them.
I agree that they are brought up to wuzzy. I have always treated kids (at work) much more mature than the parents would have thought the kids could take. I gave them responsibilities up to what they where able to and I gave them room for decisions (things that are not very important but give them the feeling that they can decide).
Worked very well, "my" kids didn't shout around, they asked for things, they were generally of good behaviour (of course sometimes someone steps out of line but that is when I had sanctions).
I will be happy if my kid will be embarrassed about something so it learns from it, I will not stop it fighting with other kids because it learns from it, etc etc. And I will teach it lessons too.
Kids in general understand more than most people think.
Babies already learn when and why mommy reacts to their crying.
A one year old child already knows exactly well how to get what it wants.
It is never too early to start educating your child. This does not start with 5 years "because that is when they remember things". They remember things before that and they learn before that. When you start educating your child with 5 you start too late, sorry.

About spanking:
I remember back at my college we had a psychology teacher who pretty much taught us to not give sanctions to children. I remember him drawing a "sanction monster" on the blackboard.
And he filled the monster with "negative" sanctions. I never aggreed with that. Every sanction is negative. Sit in the corner is as negative as a spank on the butt. Just the spank hurts, the sitting in the corner doesn't.
When I have my own kids I will certainly not make spanking the only way of communicating a "you can't do that". It might be a last resort, a spank on the butt hasn't killed anyone. I am not someone who spanks or does anything of that kind in general.

About explaining things:
A child always only asks as far as it understands the answer. So in general I will not explain things to the last single small detail.
Example:
Kid 5 yrs "what is war?" my answer "that is when countries are fighting"
Kid 10 yrs "what is war?" my answer "That is when the leader of the country wants something from another country and sends the military there to fight for it"
Kid 15 yrs "what is war?" And that is when I get into details about politics and the cruelty of war and so on....

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20-03-2012, 03:40 AM
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
TAS

I would tell you why I disagree, but clearly you are too young and immature. I will tell you when your grown up. Big Grin

"Belief means not wanting to know what is true"
Friedrich Nietzsche
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20-03-2012, 03:44 AM
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
Certainly children ought to be treated with respect. Snatching toys or objects from them simply because you are bigger and stronger than them only shows them that they are disrespected and can be violated at will.
They do have minds, they do understand more than they are given credit for.

Unfortunately they have emotional storms and their brains aren't developed enough to stop the storm from controlling them. I'm sure it is tough being a kid.

Child tv stars, movies stars and music stars are often treated like adults well before they are equipped to handle such responsibility. Many go off the rails later on in life. Childhood, it seems, is a very important part of growing up.
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20-03-2012, 04:02 AM (This post was last modified: 20-03-2012 04:25 AM by Eternal.)
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
Children are learning all the time. They learn more by example than they do your words. Do you not think that spanking your child could teach them that a violent reaction to a wrong is the correct course of action. I personally have only ever got physical with my children in any way when they have done so with me e.g. when the baby biting stage is going on, if my son or daughter bit me, I would bite them back (not too hard of course) because it is important that they learn to expect their behaviour to receive such behaviour in return.

You say why can't we treat them like adults then go on a rant about spanking. How many adults would you spank to make a point, do you not see the contradiction here? I do believe that boundaries and discipline are important though, I just believe there are better ways to achieve better results.

I always took the tac of complete honesty with my children, and in the interests of teaching by example, if they ever had questions I would not just answer them but we would either work out the answer through discussion or we would look into it. I noticed early on that this seemed to instil a good attitude towards problem solving and make them more reflective when faced with problems or adversity. How you go about this is of course dictated by the childs age and ability at the time.

I think it also worth noting that childhood is the only time in your life when life can be fairly simple, without the stresses that follow in later life. It is important to let them enjoy this time. Just because a child is mature doesn't mean they shouldn't let their hair down and go silly a bit. Growing up quickly is not always desirable, growing up with a good attitude and outlook is. The best way to do this is to provide a balanced and loving home, be the best role model you can be because in the early days your actions are your childs main point of reference for how to act later in life.

I also note by your tone that you clearly know that your stance is the correct one, this leads me to point out that it is important to also instil a bit of humility and open mindedness into your children. Like above with the biting example, you need to learn that how you interact will receive a similar reaction. Your opening statement reduces anyone that disagree's with you to an irresponsible cry baby. Amongst those irresponsible cry babies are some of the worlds leading child psychologists, psychiatrists and child behaviour specialists. But as we know already, you of course know better. If you decide that you don't then you are leaving yourself very little room for manoeuvre without looking like an idiot.

I agree about people taking responsibility for their actions, it would go a long way. I think to many people have children these days without fully considering the consequences. There are many that are too flippant about their responsibilities as a parent also.

Just as a footnote whilst we are on the subject of the correct way to raise kids. Please re-read your opening post as a third party who may hold different views to yourself. If you can do this you may get an insight into why usually I believe you come across as arrogant and immature.

"Belief means not wanting to know what is true"
Friedrich Nietzsche
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20-03-2012, 04:32 AM
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
I already went down that hostile road, TAS. For further insight into the forum's consensus on spanking, peruse this past thread.

"Ain't got no last words to say, yellow streak right up my spine. The gun in my mouth was real and the taste blew my mind."

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20-03-2012, 05:05 AM (This post was last modified: 20-03-2012 05:16 AM by TheArcticSage.)
RE: Why aren't children treated like Adults?
(20-03-2012 04:02 AM)Eternal Wrote:  Children are learning all the time. They learn more by example than they do your words. Do you not think that spanking your child could teach them that a violent reaction to a wrong is the correct course of action. I personally have only ever got physical with my children in any way when they have done so with me e.g. when the baby biting stage is going on, if my son or daughter bit me, I would bite them back (not too hard of course) because it is important that they learn to expect their behaviour to receive such behaviour in return.

You say why can't we treat them like adults then go on a rant about spanking. How many adults would you spank to make a point, do you not see the contradiction here? I do believe that boundaries and discipline are important though, I just believe there are better ways to achieve better results.

I always took the tac of complete honesty with my children, and in the interests of teaching by example, if they ever had questions I would not just answer them but we would either work out the answer through discussion or we would look into it. I noticed early on that this seemed to instil a good attitude towards problem solving and make them more reflective when faced with problems or adversity. How you go about this is of course dictated by the childs age and ability at the time.

I think it also worth noting that childhood is the only time in your life when life can be fairly simple, without the stresses that follow in later life. It is important to let them enjoy this time. Just because a child is mature doesn't mean they shouldn't let their hair down and go silly a bit. Growing up quickly is not always desirable, growing up with a good attitude and outlook is. The best way to do this is to provide a balanced and loving home, be the best role model you can be because in the early days your actions are your childs main point of reference for how to act later in life.

I also note by your tone that you clearly know that your stance is the correct one, this leads me to point out that it is important to also instil a bit of humility and open mindedness into your children. Like above with the biting example, you need to learn that how you interact will receive a similar reaction. Your opening statement reduces anyone that disagree's with you to an irresponsible cry baby. Amongst those irresponsible cry babies are some of the worlds leading child psychologists, psychiatrists and child behaviour specialists. But as we know already, you of course know better. If you decide that you don't then you are leaving yourself very little room for manoeuvre without looking like an idiot.

I agree about people taking responsibility for their actions, it would go a long way. I think to many people have children these days without fully considering the consequences. There are many that are too flippant about their responsibilities as a parent also.

Just as a footnote whilst we are on the subject of the correct way to raise kids. Please re-read your opening post as a third party who may hold different views to yourself. If you can do this you may get an insight into why usually I believe you come across as arrogant and immature.

Psychologists? I don't believe in psychologists, nor do I believe people need them, they shouldn't exist. But they do... do you know why? Because people fail at observing their own psychology, so they have another person observe it for them and making decisions for them, based on their observations. Sorry to say this but I'm not going to have someone else make a decision that I should have been the one to make in the first place. I mean hell if I wanted that done I'd just join a religion (it's cheaper if you don't plan on putting money in the alms basket) Child behavior specialists... don't need those either. Want to know why you're kid is misbehaving? Because you have failed as a parent. There's an easy way to remedy behavior Eternal, and that's just give them a spanking when they behave badly.

People don't spank adults, they punch them. I'm not going to punch a kid, nor would I bite them. As for knowing better, I would certainly say I know how to NOT raise a child, you can actually learn a lot when you use the power of observation, not only on yourself but on others as well! And as for my original post I retract nothing. People should be treated as they act, and maybe they'll learn a few lessons mommy and daddy never bothered to give them. I didn't base what I said out of the blue, I based it on my observations of how their children acted. Like I said, observation is a powerful tool.

If the truth is arrogance sue me. It might hurt, but I'm not one for caring about people's feelings. Tough Shit, tough life, be prepared for it. Damn cat becomes a young adult in 1 year and it takes kids 16 years to become one? Nature, the world's greatest parent. Some wrongs do deserve violent reactions, as you said, when they bit you (a wrong) you bit them (a violent reaction). Though spanking is just a sting, it's not really all that violent... at least not as violent as biting them. But the actions I'm referring to which would deserve a violent reaction as an adult I mean only the worst of actions for a human to commit, the reaction of course is execution. But that's for another topic.

(20-03-2012 04:32 AM)Buddy Christ Wrote:  I already went down that hostile road, TAS. For further insight into the forum's consensus on spanking, peruse this past thread.

I do not get angry about many things in life, this is one of the few though. Survival of the fittest, our children must be fit to survive. Even within our society Social Darwinism exists, and I include more things than just spanking them as a way of making them fit. The future of our species rests upon them, that is why it is of utmost importance to raise them properly. Spanking isn't so much about punishment, it's more about discipline.
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