Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
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13-10-2014, 09:13 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
I haven't read all of the replies, but this sounds like classic "nice guy" syndrome to me.

I'd recomend reading No More Mr. Nice Guy by Robert Glover.

Quote:A Nice Guy’s primary goal is to make other people happy.

Nice Guys are dependent on external validation and avoid conflict like the plague.

Nice Guys are guided by the following three covert contracts:

-If I am a good guy, then everyone will love me and like me (and people I desire will desire me).

-If I meet other people’s needs without them having to ask, then they will meet my needs without me having to ask.

-If I do everything right, then I will have a smooth, problem-free life.


These covert contracts operate at an unconscious level. They don’t work for a number of reasons, but Nice Guys are convinced they should.

Because most Nice Guys believe they have kept their side of the contract, they often feel helpless and resentful when other people (and the world) don’t keep their side of the contract.

Just to be clear, the book isn't about becoming an asshole. It's about teaching "nice guys" how to take responsibility for meeting their own needs and being honest in their relationships with others.

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13-10-2014, 09:13 AM (This post was last modified: 13-10-2014 09:27 AM by DLJ.)
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(13-10-2014 08:40 AM)Chas Wrote:  
(13-10-2014 08:26 AM)Mathilda Wrote:  Because we know that not all women are like that. People were genuinely wanting to help you find the right woman but you seem to be taking it the wrong way.

That's what trolls do. Yes

And so do people who sometimes simply take things the wrong way.

And also people who think that other people have taking things the wrong and want to correct them.

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13-10-2014, 09:25 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(12-10-2014 08:24 AM)Forbes Wrote:  Hi. I'm a 35 year old male and I've never had a girlfriend who is willing to serve me.

When I was a kid, my mother always told me that I should treat women nicely and do things for them. So that's what I've always done. And I like doing stuff for women.

I like buying gifts (nothing too expensive, just gestures), bringing things for them, cooking for them, helping them out, fixing things when they need fixing, running errands if it's not too much of an inconvenience, the list goes on and on and on. It's the way I've always been. I get a lot of satisfaction from doing things for women.

The problem is that they don't like to reciprocate. I had my first girlfriend at the age of 17, and since then I've had 12 in total. And without exception, whenever I politely asked them to do something, even something minor like bringing me something from across the room, their responses have ranged from doing it very reluctantly to arguing about why I'm telling them what to do. All of them have had a real big problem about it.

I've always thought that it's supposed to be a two way street. You serve them, they serve you, you help each other, and as a result you're better off with each other. like a team.

So why is it that all 12 of the girlfriends that I've had, had such a bug up their ass about something so simple and reasonable as doing something for the other person? I treated them all very well and yet they did very little for me. Like I say, my philosophy is that you should help and serve each other.

If I have no problem serving them and making their lives better, how come they couldn't stand the thought of serving me too?
Maybe your the problem.

Trouble rather the tiger in his lair than the sage among his books. For to you kingdoms and their armies are things mighty and enduring, but to him they are but toys of the moment, to be overturned with the flick of a finger.”

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13-10-2014, 09:31 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(13-10-2014 09:25 AM)Winterwolf00 Wrote:  
(12-10-2014 08:24 AM)Forbes Wrote:  Hi. I'm a 35 year old male and I've never had a girlfriend who is willing to serve me.

When I was a kid, my mother always told me that I should treat women nicely and do things for them. So that's what I've always done. And I like doing stuff for women.

I like buying gifts (nothing too expensive, just gestures), bringing things for them, cooking for them, helping them out, fixing things when they need fixing, running errands if it's not too much of an inconvenience, the list goes on and on and on. It's the way I've always been. I get a lot of satisfaction from doing things for women.

The problem is that they don't like to reciprocate. I had my first girlfriend at the age of 17, and since then I've had 12 in total. And without exception, whenever I politely asked them to do something, even something minor like bringing me something from across the room, their responses have ranged from doing it very reluctantly to arguing about why I'm telling them what to do. All of them have had a real big problem about it.

I've always thought that it's supposed to be a two way street. You serve them, they serve you, you help each other, and as a result you're better off with each other. like a team.

So why is it that all 12 of the girlfriends that I've had, had such a bug up their ass about something so simple and reasonable as doing something for the other person? I treated them all very well and yet they did very little for me. Like I say, my philosophy is that you should help and serve each other.

If I have no problem serving them and making their lives better, how come they couldn't stand the thought of serving me too?
Maybe your the problem.

Maybe the problem is all those women. I am in the Uk after all.
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13-10-2014, 09:33 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(13-10-2014 09:31 AM)Forbes Wrote:  
(13-10-2014 09:25 AM)Winterwolf00 Wrote:  Maybe your the problem.

Maybe the problem is all those women. I am in the Uk after all.

Then either you have horrible choice in women or you're so arrogant that you can't take an honest look at yourself.
Which is it?
And what the fuck does the UK have to do with it?

Trouble rather the tiger in his lair than the sage among his books. For to you kingdoms and their armies are things mighty and enduring, but to him they are but toys of the moment, to be overturned with the flick of a finger.”

― Gordon R. Dickson
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13-10-2014, 09:34 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(13-10-2014 09:31 AM)Forbes Wrote:  Maybe the problem is all those women. I am in the Uk after all.

I've heard that red haired Irish women can be extremely submissive ...
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13-10-2014, 09:35 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
Personally, i think you're trying the mr nice guy but with expectations. And i cant be sure what those expectations are given these gals aren't nice to you in return. I could see maybe a couple just being selfish but all of them? Seems odd.
So that leaves me to think its how you meet them...a specific sort of females....club types or princess kind?
I just can't really know.

Whatever the cause you need to change it up.
And maybe rethink gifts... That they're gifts without expectations.

When I want your opinion I'll read your entrails.
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13-10-2014, 09:38 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(13-10-2014 09:34 AM)Mathilda Wrote:  
(13-10-2014 09:31 AM)Forbes Wrote:  Maybe the problem is all those women. I am in the Uk after all.

I've heard that red haired Irish women can be extremely submissive ...

Then my ex is the exception that proves the rule. Dodgy

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13-10-2014, 09:39 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(13-10-2014 09:31 AM)Forbes Wrote:  
(13-10-2014 09:25 AM)Winterwolf00 Wrote:  Maybe your the problem.

Maybe the problem is all those women. I am in the Uk after all.

Sit thi doon and stop trying t' manufacture right silly cases for thi sen. Uz country is nay t' problem, thou are, quite obviously like.

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13-10-2014, 09:47 AM
RE: Why can't I find a woman who is willing to serve me?
(13-10-2014 09:33 AM)Winterwolf00 Wrote:  
(13-10-2014 09:31 AM)Forbes Wrote:  Maybe the problem is all those women. I am in the Uk after all.

Then either you have horrible choice in women or you're so arrogant that you can't take an honest look at yourself.
Which is it?
And what the fuck does the UK have to do with it?

What does the UK have to do with it? Are you a moron? The UK is known for trampy, unfeminine women. have you heard of Jeremy Kyle? There's a reason why his show is such a success. Just look at the trash he has on day after day. Same with US women. Absolute filth and trash. Try doing a show like his in the Ukraine, Philippines, Russia, Vietname, Thailand, etc.
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