Why do I get so clingy
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20-05-2016, 03:20 PM
Why do I get so clingy
I don't cling to everyone, but I can get clingy at times. It only happens to people I've talked to. Maybe I look up to them or I have a lot in common with them. I'll get really clingy and want to talk whenever I can. I have to hold myself back sometimes. XD I'm wondering if it's because I don't have very people in person to relate to? I'm not sure. I think it's so cool when I can find people I relate to and they're really nice. It doesn't have to be a dating kind of thing. Just friends. They could probably be any age. Usually older than me, though. If I meet someone who's really cool and stuff, I'll get clingy. If they're my age, I'd probably get more competitive than clingy. Laugh out load

Does anyone know why stuff like this happens? I'd love to know because I don't know what to think.

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20-05-2016, 03:36 PM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
(20-05-2016 03:20 PM)CosmicRaven Wrote:  I don't cling to everyone, but I can get clingy at times. It only happens to people I've talked to. Maybe I look up to them or I have a lot in common with them. I'll get really clingy and want to talk whenever I can. I have to hold myself back sometimes. XD I'm wondering if it's because I don't have very people in person to relate to? I'm not sure. I think it's so cool when I can find people I relate to and they're really nice. It doesn't have to be a dating kind of thing. Just friends. They could probably be any age. Usually older than me, though. If I meet someone who's really cool and stuff, I'll get clingy. If they're my age, I'd probably get more competitive than clingy. Laugh out load

Does anyone know why stuff like this happens? I'd love to know because I don't know what to think.

What do you mean? Are you talking about being clingy with people on the forum, or that you are clingy with people you talk to in general?

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20-05-2016, 03:40 PM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
(20-05-2016 03:36 PM)ELK12695 Wrote:  
(20-05-2016 03:20 PM)CosmicRaven Wrote:  I don't cling to everyone, but I can get clingy at times. It only happens to people I've talked to. Maybe I look up to them or I have a lot in common with them. I'll get really clingy and want to talk whenever I can. I have to hold myself back sometimes. XD I'm wondering if it's because I don't have very people in person to relate to? I'm not sure. I think it's so cool when I can find people I relate to and they're really nice. It doesn't have to be a dating kind of thing. Just friends. They could probably be any age. Usually older than me, though. If I meet someone who's really cool and stuff, I'll get clingy. If they're my age, I'd probably get more competitive than clingy. Laugh out load

Does anyone know why stuff like this happens? I'd love to know because I don't know what to think.

What do you mean? Are you talking about being clingy with people on the forum, or that you are clingy with people you talk to in general?

Either.

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20-05-2016, 03:48 PM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
You get clingy 'cos you're not that confident - is my guess. I say this as a guy who used to get pretty clingy with people I was keen on. It's *very* hard not to. The way to break it is to develop confidence, and the way to do that is to realise that you're actually pretty cool yourself. And that people should damn well *want* to hang out with you - you don't need to feel like they're doing you a favour.

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(06-02-2014 03:47 PM)Momsurroundedbyboys Wrote:  And I'm giving myself a conclusion again from all the facepalming.
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20-05-2016, 03:50 PM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
(20-05-2016 03:40 PM)CosmicRaven Wrote:  
(20-05-2016 03:36 PM)ELK12695 Wrote:  What do you mean? Are you talking about being clingy with people on the forum, or that you are clingy with people you talk to in general?

Either.

People react differently to it. Take me for example. I don't mind getting a lot of attention, but usually only from one person at a time, atleast on this forum. So I wouldn't mind getting spammed from you if you did it.

When I talk to people, I start slow and carefully. When I get comfortable around the person, I know if the person likes the clingyness or not. I can spam all I want to say Revenant or Gulegon, 'cause they take maybe 80 % of the crap I say or send as something to discuss. With say, Banjo or DLJ on the other hand, I'm more calm and wait for a topic that is nice for both of us to talk about.

That's how I do it anyway.

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21-05-2016, 03:38 AM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
(20-05-2016 03:50 PM)ELK12695 Wrote:  I can spam all I want to say Revenant or Gulegon, 'cause they take maybe 80 % of the crap I say or send as something to discuss. With say, Banjo or DLJ on the other hand, I'm more calm and wait for a topic that is nice for both of us to talk about.

Don't worry. I spam poor Banjo and I'm sure DLJ has his own personal spammer too. Big Grin
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21-05-2016, 11:31 AM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
(21-05-2016 03:38 AM)LadyDay Wrote:  
(20-05-2016 03:50 PM)ELK12695 Wrote:  I can spam all I want to say Revenant or Gulegon, 'cause they take maybe 80 % of the crap I say or send as something to discuss. With say, Banjo or DLJ on the other hand, I'm more calm and wait for a topic that is nice for both of us to talk about.

Don't worry. I spam poor Banjo and I'm sure DLJ has his own personal spammer too. Big Grin

Oh well, I'm a little careful with Dale. When he's really sick, he can only answer so much. So I ask him "How do you play this?" or "What has this drummer done?". I try not to waste his time or expertise.

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22-05-2016, 03:54 PM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
(20-05-2016 03:20 PM)CosmicRaven Wrote:  I don't cling to everyone, but I can get clingy at times. It only happens to people I've talked to. Maybe I look up to them or I have a lot in common with them. I'll get really clingy and want to talk whenever I can. I have to hold myself back sometimes. XD I'm wondering if it's because I don't have very people in person to relate to? I'm not sure. I think it's so cool when I can find people I relate to and they're really nice. It doesn't have to be a dating kind of thing. Just friends. They could probably be any age. Usually older than me, though. If I meet someone who's really cool and stuff, I'll get clingy. If they're my age, I'd probably get more competitive than clingy. Laugh out load

Does anyone know why stuff like this happens? I'd love to know because I don't know what to think.

You were raised in a culture that eroded your self-esteem and told you not to think. In leaving that you've lost a lot of your relationships with friends and family.

Then you meet people who think you're a genuinely cool person and value your thoughts. It'd be weird if you didn't get "clingy".

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22-05-2016, 03:59 PM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
I used to get really clingy to women I was attracted to. This changed when I gained personal confidence (as morondog mentioned slightly above). I don't know if that's the same kind of "clingy" you're meaning, but, if it is then the only advice I have is to persevere and push through it. I was clingier to the women in my life that I loved less. Now I am genuinely in love with my perfect woman and it is the woman I have been least clingy towards. This is probably because I am so confident in my love and hers that I need not be in constant contact with her.

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22-05-2016, 04:32 PM
RE: Why do I get so clingy
(20-05-2016 03:20 PM)CosmicRaven Wrote:  I don't cling to everyone, but I can get clingy at times. It only happens to people I've talked to. Maybe I look up to them or I have a lot in common with them. I'll get really clingy and want to talk whenever I can. I have to hold myself back sometimes. XD I'm wondering if it's because I don't have very people in person to relate to? I'm not sure. I think it's so cool when I can find people I relate to and they're really nice. It doesn't have to be a dating kind of thing. Just friends. They could probably be any age. Usually older than me, though. If I meet someone who's really cool and stuff, I'll get clingy. If they're my age, I'd probably get more competitive than clingy. Laugh out load

Does anyone know why stuff like this happens? I'd love to know because I don't know what to think.

'Cause you're a teenage girl? Just guessing.

#sigh
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